Tri Jill! Tri!

Mini Victories

2012-02-07T07:44:00.000-08:00

RESULTS!
IMMEDIATE GRATIFICATION!
NOW!
GO BIG OR GO HOME!

Sometimes I get stuck in this mindset: I decide to do something, and I want it happen ASAP. Be it signing up for a 1/2 marathon and hoping for a sub 2 hour time, or wanting to lose X amount of pounds. There is a lot of time, hardwork and dedication involves in those things, but I want it NOW.

Which is not the best way to look at the world, right?

I signed up for this Death Ride thing knowing that I need to put the time in and there will be a lot of steps to get to the point of doing this event in 6 months. Time on bike. Core. Cross training. Rest days. Hill repeats. Balancing the rest of my life and sanity.

So, I am really focusing on the RIGHT NOW and the mini victories.

Saturday was DEFINITELY a mini victory kind of day. A couple friends and I planned a bike ride in Pleasanton. My friend Gina sent us the route the day before, and I (of course) kind of glazed over it. We started our ride at 7:20ish am. The route caught part of the Cinderella ride I will be doing in March. Gina said there would be a couple climbs--most significantly a 7% grade. We hit the first hill and that felt great. Then we hit a stop sign and Gina said we were to go right. Then it dawned on me.
"Are we doing the Challenge hill?"
Gina said, "I think so."

Hmmm...the "challenge" hill is an option for the cinderella ride if you want to add mileage and hills. I did the Challenge two years ago. It was HARD. I signed up for the Challenge this year and was already having anxiety about climbing it at the end of March. And now, we are doing it today? Whoa.

So, I did it...and I think it felt better than 2 years ago! And it's early February! Mini victory----time on the bike trainer, having quality workouts is actually working! Who woulda thunk it?

Another mini victory? Having breakfast after this 50 mile bike ride and not eating my weight in pancakes,eggs, toast, hashbrowns....fill in the carb here. Sometimes I get in the mindset of "Well, I deserve this big old plate of food because I ran/biked/swam/took out the garbage."

Another mini victory? Weigh in was last night. Down 2.6 pounds...Less Jill Up the Hill is on track.

The last mini victory is I finally used my bikram groupon yesterday! Mystery of bikram is dispelled. Not sure it is for me---I kinda prefer the more warm fuzzy gentle yoga and all the sweat in the room was kinda gross.

But I didn't feel like I got hit by a truck this morning, which is ALWAYS a mini victory.

WHOA NELLY!

2012-02-02T16:20:00.000-08:00

Um, did my 2012 events just, like, double in size in the blink of an eye?

Um, am I addicted to Active.com?

Um, have I not learned ANYTHING from the past three years?

The answer to these questions is yes, yes, no.

While I did register for quite a few events, these events are ALL training related for Death Ride. Century rides are great for my training because I get the mileage and elevation (for the most part) and they are supported so I can refuel at rest stops.

The triathlon in June? What can I say, old habits die hard.

So the training...it's going. Right now it is all about getting back in the saddle. Hubby bought this way futuristic computer bike trainer thingy (don't you just love how techy I sound). I finally tried it last Sunday. It is crazy. The trainer is connected to a computer and you can download routes from the computer and from rides you did outside with your GPS. The first time I watched Hubby do it he downloaded a route from a ride in Italy. Not only did it mimic the ascent and descent of the ride, the screen (we have it hooked up to our TV) shows a simulation of the route so you are riding with cars and going past the ocean. I was yelling at him, "Watch out for that pedestrian! Don't go over that cliff!"

Anyways, for my first ride I did a 12 mile route from a ride my husband did in the real outdoors: from our house to Mt. Eden. It was pretty cool because the screen showed where you were riding in Google maps. It was pretty close to the route except I think the GPS got confused at intersections because the trainer went on a major incline at some intersections. Like, 10%! I got a lit bored looking at the google maps, so switched over to The Devil Wears Prada. The downside to that is the hills are a bit of a surprise.

I tried to do it again today on my lunchtime ride, and forgot all the instructions hubby gave me. The trainer is a Dutch product and is not super user friendly (especially for a non-techy like me!). Finally I gave up and just got on and did my usual interval workout. (side note: hubby just came home and I told him my issues. He said, "Maybe because you were using the keyboard that controls TIVO. Not the keyboard hooked up to the computer hooked up to the trainer." Seriously? Two keyboards? I think he makes things super technical and difficult to mess with my head. Can't there just be ONE button that works WHEN I want it?)

I am also trying to figure out how to mix in swimming and running with all this biking because I think the cross training will be good for my sanity and overall fitness. Which means it is good timing because Team Mermaid is starting its season on Tuesday. I am pretty excited because I am ready for Coach Heidi to be the boss of me and help me on my way to fitness breakthroughs.

Operation Less Jill Up the Hill is going pretty well. I am down two pounds my first week and --more importantly--am really diligent about writing down food consumed. Hubby and I are still on our angry rant about fast food commercials. There was a commercial for Carls Jr's "healthy" turkey burger. Hubby asked me how many points are in that so I looked it up---it would be almost half my points for a day! WHOA NELLY! That is so "healthy" Carl's jr.

The one thing that is a challenge is work. Our volunteers are ALWAYS baking in the house (which is super awesome for the clients we serve), but on the days when I have my laptop set up in the dining room it can be super tough with the smells of brownies wafting in. Here is a conversation I had with one of my volunteers this week:
Volunteer: I am making my Dangerous Dessert?
Me: Dangerous Dessert?
Volunteer: Yup. Its an apple spice cake. And then I poked holes in it. And then I poured caramel sauce over it.
Me: WHOA
Volunteer: and once the caramel sauce soaked into the cake I frosted it with cream cheese frosting.
me: WHOA
Volunteer: and then I topped it with pecans.
Me: WHOA NELLY!

Fortunately, I have had the willpower to be dessert free at work for the past two weeks. Which is pretty amazing considering we have things like Dangerous Desserts lying around.

Are you happy now, Jennifer Hudson?

2012-01-29T10:45:00.001-08:00

I am sick, sick, sick, sick. Isn't that just the Murphy's Law of event training? I had a good solid two weeks of working out, using my bike trainer, and even actually paying attention to my heart rate monitor and then last Wednesday morning I was all ACHOO! And I was down for the count.

But I won't whine. Feeling betterish now and, in reality, it is only 5 days of being out of the game. Death Ride is in 6 months. It's all good.

The bigger thing right now is this nutrition thing. I NEED to figure it out. Especially with these long rides that are coming up because I don't want to fall into old habits of having a crazy calorie laden meal and justifying it with a 4 hour bike ride. I flirted with the idea of going paleo, but I knew that realistically the militant rules of paleo would not work for me. A couple weeks ago I was flipping through my magazines and I kept seeing that darn Jennifer Hudson ad for Weight Watchers. After the third spotting of Jennifer in an US weekly, I took it as a sign. I had done WW before and it worked. It worked because I dedicated myself to it. And dedication and awareness to what I eat is definitely what I need to do NOW. Are you happy now, Jennifer Hudson?

So, last Monday I went to my first meeting. That scale...it was not good. The great thing about WW is there is no judgement. I was bracing myself for a "tsk tsk Jill, how did you let THAT happen?" Thankfully they didn't do that. The voices in my head did a little...but I tried to ignore them...

At the meeting the leader asked why I was joining again. I told her that I signed up for a crazy bike ride with crazy hills and I wanted less Jill going up the hills. I think that is my new mantra: LESS JILL UP THE HILL. I am actually pretty excited because the less extra weight I am carrying, the faster and more efficient I may be as a cyclist. This could be THE year where I have a cycling breakthrough.

It was bad timing that I got sick my first week of WW. I opted not to have my preferred snack choice when I am sick (sour patch kids) and dutifully stayed within my daily points range and tried to not be all Debbie Downer because I didn't have the energy to workout.

So, I am one week of doing WW. It's always mind blowing when you start tracking what you eat. I am sure there have been time where I ate all my points in one meal (or one trip to the movies!). It is also helpful that hubby has been watching what he eats as well. He is down 15 pounds because he got a head start on me (JERK! hee hee). It's pretty funny when fast food commercials come on because we both start yelling at the TV ("Curse you McDonald's! Nobody Should be eating that! Nobody!"). Seriously, have you SEEN that Sonic commercial? There is one item that is a bowl of tater tots covered in chili and cheese. SERIOUSLY?

Fortunately there aren't any Sonic's near me...

Thank you Team Mermaid.

2012-01-22T19:46:00.000-08:00

I am going to try to keep this one short...and (bitter)sweet.

A big chunk of this blog focuses on this amazing team I am going on my 5th(!) year of being a member: Team Mermaid. And I found it by accident! I had signed up for a 1/2 ironman triathloan and googled "triathlon training san jose Barb's race" and found out about an info night for some group called Team Mermaid. I went to that first meeting just wanting to help me with training for ONE race. And here I am, 4 years later, still inspired by these amazing women who work hard, play hard, and laugh HARDER. Every single woman on this team has drive, spirit, and a good heart. And we all are rallied on by our leader the amazing coach Heidi.

Today a bunch of us from the team met in Capitola for an open water swim...wait, what? A swim? In January? What the heck? But this wasn't any ordinary ocean swim...

Two weeks ago we lost a dear friend and mermaid teammate, Melissa, to ovarian cancer. I am still in shock. She was one of the first on the team, an amazing, funny, smart person and a totally awesome swimmer. We decided as a team to do a memorial swim for her today. We met at some benches at Capitola beach, pulled on our wetsuits, and headed out to the water. It was cold. It was choppy. But we were determined. This was something bigger than us. We didn't go out very far, and we all stopped and Coach Heidi (who was on a surfboard ) said some amazing things about Melissa and passed out carnations for us. A couple other people told some stories and on the count of three we shouted out "Mermaid Melissa!" and threw our carnations out to sea.

And then we were silent.

We stared out at the carnations lapping in the water. Some coming back to us. Some going far out. It was an overcast day with some drizzling rain, the sun barely poking out. I watched the carnations drifting and was taken by the contrast surrounding me: the water may be cold and choppy, but gazing at the neverending sea is so soothing. The softness of the carnations brushing up against seaweed. The heavy silence in the air of our reflections and mourning, mixed with the tranquil sound of waves.

I miss you Melissa. WE miss you Melissa. I am thankful for all the memories I have because we shared some laughs! Seriously, if you can't find laughter while cranking your way through 60 miles on a bike ride, you are doing it wrong. :)

I am thankful to be part of this amazing team, where we take risks continously and encourage one another on. Where we barely bat an eye jumping in the ocean in winter (OK, so we may have shrieked a little, but we still were pretty hardcore!).

Thank you Team Mermaid. You have helped me become the person I am today, and inspire me to grow into the person I will be tomorrow.

The Problem with Pink...

2012-01-16T16:00:00.000-08:00

It's 2012 and we still have issues like this. Luckily there is hope for the future with outspoken girls like Riley leading the next wave of feminism.

So, let me start with the LEGO thing. It's kinda messed up, right? One image I saw was a LEGO girl lounging in a pastel pool playset. I guess they have cupcake stores as well. Does LEGO think little girls have aspirations of being real housewives of sugar daddies (pool boy and botox kit sold separately). And cupcake bakeries? Seriously LEGO? Cupcakes are totally 2010. It's all about doughnts now. Or whoopie pies. Get with the times...

In December I was at Barnes and Noble and saw a book called: Princess Recovery: A Parent's Guide to Raising a Daughter Who Can Create Her Own Happily Ever After. Has anyone else noticed how crazy the princess phenomenon is? Seriously, at Halloween I think every single trick or treating girls was some variation of a Disney Princess.

And the really embarassing thing? I LOOOVE all the princess stuff. I love dresses. My bike is pink! I wear sparkle skirts to races. I got excited that Splash was on TV last week. Oh...and don't get me started on The Real Housewives. Oh, and my triathlete nickname is Diva.

WWGSD? (What Would Gloria Steinem Do?)

I have no idea.

There is something weird going on with pop culture right now because there is a lot of cattiness between women (see Top Model, Real Housewives, The Bachelor). Wouldn't it be refreshing if there was a reality show about a group of REAL friends who REALLY liked each other and didn't throw tables at each other AND supported each other in their lives? And wouldn't it be REALLY refreshing if people actually WATCHED the show and it didn't get cancelled after two seasons. Uh, BRAVO, are you taking notes on this?

I would love to tell you that I am going to quit cold turkey watching these shows. But. They. Are. So. Awesome. And I am an adult. I can watch what I want and separate reality from the (hardly) reality TV.

I wish I had something inspirational to say and I could quote a Whitney Houston song (I believe the children are our future...). Perhaps the take-away message is awareness. We need to be aware of the messages we send kids AND the images they are exposed to. So maybe the next time I play Barbies with my niece instead of pretending they are going to a fashion show, maybe they are business partners launching their Etsy store. Or, say my niece gets that LEGO poop party atrocity-- I could say, "Yea! the LEGO girls just finished a triathlon and now they are going to jump in the pool for a recovery ice bath. What was their average heart rate for the race?"

It's a start...

Ch-Ch-Chia!

2012-01-06T14:52:00.000-08:00

I did a wee bit of updating on my blog...most notably added all events I will be doing until the Death Ride. It was actually longer than what is posted there. I started getting a little panicky as I added the events and am a little iffy on the non cycling events. What the heck have I gotten myself into? I talked myself out of a couple events. Which, shows some level of growth and maturity on my part, right?

I found a training plan for the Death Ride that is 18 weeks long. As I was scanning it on my laptop I must have had a funny look because hubby said, "What's wrong?"

"Well," I said, "I am reading this training plan...and it just seems weird."
"Why?" He asked.
"Well, it's 18 weeks long. And it has a ride every day. Like, EVERY day."
"And?" He asked.
"Well, that's, like, a lot of riding, right?"
"Let me see that," he said as he grabbed the laptop.

I could feel my palms get all clammy and sweaty. Being on the bike? Every day? 18 weeks? The more I tried to wrap my mind around it the more I felt like my head was going to explode.

He handed me back the laptop, "Seems about right."

"What?! Every day seems crazy. What about rest days?"
"You do have rest days. Those are called 'easy rides'."
I gave him a "whatcha talkin about Willis?" face.
To which he responded, "YOU are the one who signed up for this crazy event."

I read the training plan a little more in depth. The rest days ranged from 0-20 miles, so theoretically I don't have to ride EVERY day. Phew. And the plan doesn't start until I get back from Maui in March. Phew. So I have about 2 months to get my act together.

And my current act? It ain't pretty.

The good news is--I have been on my bike. I did a 40 mile ride last week, and have done a couple short rides and some trainer sessions. I did the bike trainer last night for 50 minutes while watching season 1 of Alias. It. Was. Torture. I am going to trainer again tonight. But with a heart rate monitor so there is less cheating involved.

My running has slowed down a lot. I met some friends for a track workout on Tuesday night. It. Was. Torture. Everything felt tight and flabby---which seems like a contradiction. It was cold and dark and felt so against nature on what we are supposed to do in the winter. But I did it.

The plan until the plan starts is to increase my long bike rides each week by 5 miles. I will start this Sunday with 40. I also really really need to figure out this core thing. Oh, and use my bikram yoga groupon before it expires in March.

I tried this energy drink yesterday that I really like. It had chia seeds and cocounut water in it which are supposed to be great for something. Not sure what. Growing plant hair? Like a Chia pet? So, I think I mat buy the powder (it was a sample I got from a race) and try that on long rides since I am getting a little weirded out by the vibrant colors of gatorade. I think I am also going to look into making my own energy bars.

Hmmm...bikram yoga...chia seeds...homemade energy bars. Should I grow dreadlocks now too?

New Year's Suggestions

2011-12-29T13:34:00.000-08:00

Last week one of my friends posted this article on New Year's Resolutions and said it reminded her of me. Sad but true. I make these grandiose declarations about training and goals and overall-awesomeness only to ignore it all and not do my (unrealistic?) training.

So instead of New Year's Resolutions , I will follow the author's lead and write suggestions.
But...first let me preface this by saying this year I signed up for a Big Deal event: The Death Ride. I think a lot of the people in my life may be a wee bit concerned because my previous history of untraining (probably not a word, but who cares) could be downright dangerous for this 120ish mile 15k climbing bike ride. (The elevation chart is posted above...eeek...)

Is it possible to break bad habits? There isn't a super magical formula for this ride---it's really RIDE A LOT. Like, a lot a lot. But I do think putting together New Year's suggestions (NOT resolutions) will help me wrap my head around this beast, a training plan, and how to have a normal life AND be ready for this event in July. Not all the suggestions are Death Ride specific, but they do fit in the bigger picture of why I do these events and my desire to be a stronger person ready to take on the world.

So, here goes:

1. I will work on not talking myself out of things (or into).
Do you ever notice how easy it is to say "no" to things? Like, when my alarm goes off there is a decision involved, "Wake up" or "Snooze." "Snooze" is basically saying no to getting up and getting that early workout in. I go to bed with these high expecations of, "Oh yeah, I totally will wake up tomorrow and run 10 miles before work and make my lunch and make the world a totally peaceful place." But I always end up hitting snooze. So, I will work on NOT snoozing.

Case in point: yesterday my husband suggested we go on a bike ride. I was all set to talk myself out of it. I rationalized that I was tired, I rode 42 miles Friday and had back to back running races on Saturday and Sunday. But then I remembered I really need saddle time. I have a month before my training really begins and the quicker I get used to sitting on a bike saddle on a regular basis, the better.

On the flipside, I will work on not saying "yes" to certain things (like that first, second or third slice of cake).

2. I will work on not going too far in the future
One of my big bad habits is in the middle of my training for an event my mind starts to wander and I start thinking about the next event. This is dangerous territory as it is key to stay focused and keep your eye on the prize. What does this mean? It means try not to think about what the next big thing after Death Ride.

3. I will try to drown out the negative voices---including my own.
The fact is, there will always be someone smarter, prettier, funnier and triathlonier (not a word, but who cares?) than me. Just as it is easy to say "no" to waking up, it's just as easy to hate on myself. I recognize I need to do some serious self-care and I haven't really been super nice to myself. There is a running joke between my friends and I that I don't like my picture taken. And it's sad but true. I haven't taken care of myself as I have in the past and do not want to see the ugly truth as shown on digital images (I am talking to YOU race day photos). But the truth is, does it really matter that I am not a size 2? That I may never break an hour 10k again? Maybe there are people out there who don't think I can pull off this Death Ride or (FILL IN THE BLANKS) thing---but does that really matter? I mean, that is their issue, and I should work on figuring out how not to make it my issue.

I was thinking about this whole "no pictures" thing the other day as I was playing with my 7-year-old niece. What if she heard my inner thoughts on my appearance? What kind of message is that sending her? It would break my heart if she thought about herself that way. Deep down I hope that she sees me doing these events and it makes her have faith in herself, not be afraid to take risks, and know that she is an awesome person. Inside and out.

So, that's it. My big list. Nothing earth shattering or super specific.
I decided to limit it to 3. Three is a magic number. Anything past that can get overwhelming and then it is much much easier to just say no to everything.

The fact of the matter is, it's going to be hard. Life is hard. But pushing through the challenges (the ones you take on and the ones that are thrown in your face) is really where all the self-growth stuff comes from.

So...let's do this 2012...

A Slacker Triathlete's Christmas Carol

2011-12-19T13:14:00.000-08:00

We are getting close to the end of the year which means top 10 lists, New year’s Resolutions, overindulging and all that jazz. Because I am feeling the holiday spirit, I thought I would take a stab at writing a Holiday-themed post. And I present to you:

A Slacker Triathlete’s Christmas Carol.

We start our story with a (not so) young lady named Ji---er… let’s call her Diva. Diva had a case of the Scrooges this year. She had a pretty blah racing season despite finishing her second half-ironman and completing a 3.6 mile swim race. She had almost had a panic attack in an ocean swim in March, barely rode her cute pink bike, and discovered how totally unbendy she was by taking yoga. She didn’t feel like she was getting faster or stronger even though she placed in a couple races (it helped there were only 2-3 people in her age group for those races). Something was missing this year. And there was a dark cloud ominously hanging over her head in the ominous way dark clouds can hang.

Her friends tried to cheer her up by inviting her to ocean swims to which she would reply “Bah humsharks! Bah cold water!” and then do her best imitation of a 15-year-old boy by eating junk food and playing video games all day when she should be working out.

On a particularly dark and late night on the eve eve eve of Christmas she took a break from the Legend of Zelda and checked her e-mail, mainly to give her Wii-ed out hands some rest. She was visited by the Ghost of Slacker Triathlete’s Past. This being 2011, ghosts are way high tech and now can communicate via e-mail, Facebook and Twitter. She clicked “open” on the e-mail (cue scary music):

“Hey Ji---oops I mean, Diva,

Remember the Long Course?

We just wanted to drop you a note and let you know that the AVIA Wildflower Triathlon is turning 30. Mark your calendar and plan your training accordingly. We invite you to revisit your favorite course, connect with old friends and remember why Wildflower is known as “The One and Only.”

Diva shuddered at the memory of this race that was one of her biggest race failures, not to mention a totally disgusting sunburn. This was the 2^nd time Diva did not finish a ½ ironman and the first time she cried at a race (and these were soul shaking tears, not tears of joy). Why did she sign up for that race? Why didn’t she train? What happened to the Diva-dominator from 2008 who finished strong and, well finished PERIOD? What had she become?

The Ghost of Slacker Triathlete’s Past sent her an IM (remember, they are totally hooked into the technology. That way they can haunt multiple people a night. In these challenging economic times, ghosts have to be as efficient as possible otherwise they risk being replaced by a younger faster ghost.) that read:

“Learn from this DNF. You need to train. Consistently. And ride your bike more. Like, a lot more. Or you will repeat this failure again…and again…and again. TTYL.”

Diva was scared. So scared it took her an hour to recover and get back to her Zelda game. Diva was no dummy, she knew the Ghost of Slacker Triathlete’s Present was going to make a cameo appearance…it was just a matter of when.

She went to bed. She was in a deep sleep dreaming wonderful dreams when she was violently woken up by a needle being jammed in her brow.

“OWWWW!” Diva screamed, “What the---?”

The moonlight was poking through her window casting a light on some unrecognizable figure.

“Who are you? “ She asked “Are you a ghost?” She observed the expensive highlighted blonde hair and strangely bloated and contorted face, “You look…kind of human.”

The figure spoke, “Oh, I was a human. And then I sold my soul to be on the Real Housewives…can you hold still so I can finish up this Botox?”

Diva jerked back. “No thanks! I will pass on the botchilism tonight. But why are you here? I was expecting , you know, a ghost of the present yadda yadda…”

The Housewife rolled her eyes, or at least did her best to roll her eyes through facial paralysis. “Duh, that’s why I am here.”

“Oh my gawd,” Diva gasped. “Am I going to be a Real Housewife? I really don’t think hair extensions would work on me…and I can’t have a teeny dog. I am a cat person.”

“Shut your mouth. Sheesh. Like Bravo would ever take YOU. I am here to show you what your present has been: watching reruns of the Real Housewives or playing video games when you really should be thinking about your training plans and um….when was the last time you worked that core?”

“In my defense,” Diva said, “I don’t watch the Atlanta Housewives.”

“Whatever. Listen, I love it that you are like totally addicted to us, because I mean seriously, look at me. I am amazing. But if you want to have a good racing year at least get on the bike trainer while you watch or watch AFTER you workout. And brush your teeth before so you aren’t tempted for late night snacking. Ok?”

Diva shook her head “yes.”

“Awesome,” said the housewife, “I gotta jam now. I gotta go throw a table at someone or buy $25,000 sunglasses or try and get my own series. I can’t remember which one---too many SkinnyGirl cosmos I guess.”

“Before you go,” Diva pleaded, “Can you tell me how scary the Ghost of Slacker Triathlete Future is.”

“Oh yeah,” The Housewife said. “Him. Apparently future ghosts are super expensive so they tried outsourcing them but I guess there were lots of complaints because it just wasn’t the same. People would get all freaked out seeing their futures and it didn’t help having someone on the phone reading a script saying things like, “it sounds like you are scared. I do not know how to process this. Let me escalate that. For reference your job ticket number for this call is ‘42178 This ticket is now closed.”

“So, no ghost?”

“Nah, the CEO decided that in this day and age people can and should figure out their future themselves. OK…I am super bored now. Later.”

And poof! The spirit was gone leaving only a mist of airbrush tanning solution falling in droplets to the ground.

The next day Diva woke up, still freaked out by the siliconed encounter from the night before. Though the Housewife was vapid, mean, and maybe a little drunk, something she said resonated with Diva:

“In this day and age people can and should figure out their future themselves.”

Diva thought about this. She could either relive the past, train sporadically, and have horrible races OR she could figure out how to get back on track. Perhaps she could find her drive and motivation again and having a successful race.

So…Diva wil figure out all that stuff…just not now…AFTER the holidays…

Things to be thankful for: Triathlete Edition

2011-11-23T13:23:00.000-08:00

Seeing as tomorrow is Thanksgiving and everyone is talking about what they are thankful for and I haven’t blogged in a while I figured let’s do a thankful list. Wow. Hello run on sentence.

1. I am thankful the training season is over.

Because I am spent. Phew! I will do a more reflective post when it is closer to New Year’s , but this year was kind of all over the place with events. And it is done!

2. I am thankful that I can always change my mind.

Yes, I know I said I was done for the year. And yet why did I just this week decide to sign up for the Silicon Valley Turkey Trot after vowing last year never again to do it? Um, I never really learn my lesson. Plus, it has become my Thanksgiving morning tradition!

3. I am thankful for friends and family.

Because of this crazy sport called triathlon, I have become friends with some incredible, supportive, funny people who also call me out on things (ahem, like maybe not really training…). What are friends for, right? I also am thankful for the support of my hubby to be totally cool with these events that I do. And also, he knows when to keep his mouth shut when he is a little nervous about an event I do. And I like it that he brags to his co-workers about crazy things I do and they have this image that I am hardcore. We can keep my poser-ness a secret.

4. I am thankful for my coach.

Heidi. You rock. 2012 will be my 4^th year with you. For someone like me with commitment issues, that is HUGE. Thank you for being…just being Heidi.

5. I am thankful for heroes.

This past Sunday 3 of my friends completed the Ironman Arizona. An Ironman! That is crazy! One of them joined my workout group the same year I did. And to think she completed an Ironman. It gets a girl thinking…Anyways, these three ladies are total heroes to me. They had the courage to sign up for something CRAZY, the dedication to train for it, and the strength to complete it.

6. I am thankful there are other races.

You know, I have had my fare share of turkeys out there in terms of events. Sometimes I finish a race (or DON’T finish a race…I am talking to you Barb’s and Wildflower. I will be back some day so just you wait) and the outcome was a complete bummer. Maybe I was hoping to PR. Maybe I didn’t realize there were hills on the bike. Maybe it rained during the swim and I came back to a soggy transition. Seriously though, even a bad race is still a good race. I have learned so much from events that let me down. Most importantly, I have learned that I shouldn’t be bummed too long because I may miss that awesome event just around the corner.

7. I am thankful that I did it.

The best feeling is when I sign up for an event and am not 100% sure that it is something I can do and I DO IT. There is a fear involved with triathlons and all these events. Especially if it is something I have never done before. Could I swim 3.6 miles? Could I bike 200 miles? And miraculously, most of the time I get there. And finishing something feels FANTASTIC.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

Hey Lady, Take it Easy

2011-10-10T09:57:00.000-07:00

Ok. That's it. For reals.

I am done with events for the year.

That became abundantly clear at yesterday's Golden State Triathlon. It was a sprint triathlon and was probably my slowest tri ever. And I am totally, 100% cool with that because, to quote Austin Powers, "And I'm spent!"

I foolishly thought that this would be a cakewalk (mmmm...cake) because it was JUST a sprint triathlon.

So what went wrong? Mainly, two things:

First: Don't underestimate a race's difficulty just because it is a distance you have done before.

Second:
Don't overestimate your ability just because it is a distance you have done before. Yeah, I have done plenty of sprints before, but a lot of things can come into play that can affect your race.

For example, let's take a look at the events I did in September:

9/11/11 Big Kahuna 1/2 Ironman
Got sick the day after, did nothing for a week, and ran/swam a little teeny tiny pathetic but the week after

9/23/11 Had a work event, was awesome, but crazy busy, draining

9/25/11 Ran run portion for mermaid triathlon. Good pace considering lack of training.

10/1/11 3.6 mile open water swim

The 1/2 Ironman and 3.6 mile swim were both A races for me this year. Hmmm, probably not so good to have them spaced so close together.

So, already I was going into this race with event fatigue.

Also, last week I started a 21 day clean eating plan. It is really to help me get a hold on what I eat, limit my portions, eat foods that aren't empty calories etc. You get one cheat day a week and this week's happened to land on race day. However, I planned poorly and did not stop for breakfast on the way from our hotel in Sacramento to the start near the American River. I was too concerned with finding the venue. We kind of get lost a lot when we drive through Sacramento, primarily because there are bridges involved. I managed to find a mini Cliff Bar that I gulped down while setting up transition. That combined with my conservative eating the day before probably did not make for great pre-race nutrition.

After setting up transition I headed to the start of the race. The swim started way far away from transition (you had to cross a bridge to get there). I muttered a little "ouch ooch ouch" from walking barefoot through a park and over a bridge. I entered the water did some strokes and got ready for my wave to start. I noticed I had a little trouble swimming to the start buoy, but didn't really think much of it.

And then we were off.

The swim was tough. It was only 1/2 a mile and I totally thought I had it in the bag. I mean, c'mon! I swam 3.6 miles last weekend! I took off and noticed my arms were sore and I wasn't going as fast as I would like. And then it dawned on me: Oh, yeah. I swam 3.6 miles last weekend. I guess it may take time to recover from that. The swim was a little annoying because there were people stopping in the middle of the swimming, or doing breaststroke or backstroke butterfly. Argg!

As it turned out, there was a reason why the swim was so hard. It's called current. After the race I heard people talking about how hard the swim was because we were going against a really strong current. Oh, and those people weren't stopped on purpose in the river. They just couldn't get past the current. Yikes.

So, I finished the swim and proceeded to exit the lake. There were volunteers there to help you out while you climbed the MUDDY SUPER SLIPPERY STAIRS to get back to the park. Thankfully there was no falling. However, when I got out of the water and took my first step on the ground I got a swirly lightheaded feeling.

I was hungry.

I remember hearing the announcer saying there would be no aid stations on the bike. Eek. I got to transition, drank a bunch of water and reluctantly headed out on my bike.

Wow. How do you spell "SLOW?" Sheesh. I was dragging on the bike. And it was 3 five mile loops which made it feel even more tedious. After the second loop I started feeling a little weird. My stomach was cramping and I had cold sweats. I think I was running out of gas. At one point I thought about stopping after the second lap, but I just kept going.

Finally I was back in transition and getting my run stuff on. A man approached me, "I LOVE YOUR PINK BIKE! IT IS SOOOOO AWESOME!" He kept blabbing on about it, which ordinarily I like, but HELLO I am in transition! Then I asked him, "Are you finished?" He said yes to which I responded, "Well, I, uh gotta go because I have this run thing to take care of."

I headed out to the run. Right at the beginning there was an aid station. Hurrah! I grabbed Gatorade and Gu and it was like nectar of the gods. At every aid station I took a cup of Gatorade. I finally finished the 5k (with a record slow pace. Um...yea?) and f ound my hubby and we took off. I needed breakfast (and so did he since there wasn't food for spectators). We drove to our fave breakfast place in Sacramento and there must have been 30 people in line. FOILED AGAIN! We headed back to our hotel, dumped the bike, and walked to a breakfast place. We had to wait 20 minutes to get seated, which was fine. However, it was about 40 minutes before we got food. Sheesh!

Finally I had an egg white omelet in my belly and was ready for a catnap and watching Legally Blonde at the hotel room. It was awesome.

So, I learned a lot at this race. I hope I actually start applying these lessons. One thing I know is I will not be doing the 1/2 marathon I signed up for in two weeks. Judging from Sunday, my body is telling me, "Hey lady, take it easy."

I hope I do not go through event withdrawal. I already heard that some of my workout buddies are flirting with the idea of the Las Vegas Rock n Roll in December.

Must.Not.Log.Into.Active.com.

Slam the Dam: A Race Recap

2011-10-04T15:07:00.000-07:00

OK folks. Let's do this thing.

I signed up for this event in the beginning of the summer mainly because I wanted an excuse to go to Vegas and get out of town for a weekend. The Slam the Dam event is at Lake Mead which is the back of Hoover Dam. They have 3 different races going on: an 8k, 1.2, and 2.4 mile swim. For people wanting to up their distance they could do the Super Slam which s the 1.2 and 2.4 mile swim, or the grand slam which is the 8k plus 1.2 mile swim. I knew I had to justify this race by signing up for a distance out of my comfort zone. The 8k did not seem like a realistic goal, so I thought, let's do the 3.6. Why the heck not, right?

My two friends and I met at SFO on Friday to fly out together. Our flight was supposed to leave at 9:30 but got delayed to 12:30. That wouldn't have been that bad if we were at the cool section of SFO. Oh well. We had a short flight to Vegas, got a rental car and drove about 20 miles to Boulder City.

We stayed at the Hacienda Inn, which was...um, how shall I put this delicately. It is what you would expect for a $50 a night hotel next to a major tourist attraction. They did boast 99 cent shrimp cocktail on their marquee. I decided that probably would not be a good choice for dinner, so we drove to the town and had dinner at a brewery.

We woke up at 4am(!) and headed to the start of the race. Did I mention there was lightning the night before? It was 5:45 when we arrived at the beach and they were still setting up the race. It was so dark, I could not see the lake. Finally the sun rose and this enormous lake was in front of me.

My friend was signed up for the 8k and unfortunately hurt her ankle earlier in the week. She took a shuttle with our other friend who was her kayaker to the start for that event. She texted me they may cancel the 8k because a thunderstorm was coming. They ended up not canceling, but she decided to do the 2.4 as it would be tough to swim in choppy water with an injury.

There was a delay at the start time, so we probably started the 2.4 mile race at 8:15 instead of 8.

I don't really know how to write about swimming. The 2.4 felt long, and choppy. My mind wandered a little. The last 1/4 of the swim I was getting nervous. I didn't have a watch on and was not sure if I would make it to the cut off time to start the 1.2. Fortunately, I did! I waited around about 20 minutes to start the 1.2. At first I was thinking it would be tough to swim again after a break, but I was thankful for the break because I got to eat a banana, drink some water, and reapply sunscreen.

The 1.2 race started and I was off again. It is interesting comparing the two races. The 2.4 had less people, and felt more mellow (or at least the fast hardcore people were way ahead of me, so I dd not feel the intensity). The 1.2 had more people and had a lot of people stopping in the middle of the water, doing breaststroke, etc. At one point I was stuck behind 3 people swimming next to one another. I decided to go for it and pass them. And something funny happened. I felt stronger on the 1.2 mile swim, then the 2.4. The only issue I had was my left shoulder was acting up, but other than that I felt great. And I finished! Whoo hoo! I had never swam that far in the open water before. The thing that amazed me is that the past 3 weeks my swim training has decreased significantly, and yet I was still able to finish. Still waiting for race results to post. I seriously have NO IDEA what my time was.

My friends and I packed up and headed to the strip. It was a great weekend filled with yummy food, a massage, and Jabberwockeez--- an awesome vegas show!

Next up: The Golden State Triathlon this Sunday! A sprint tri with a 9:20 am wave start. YAY!

My Hundredth Post!

2011-09-25T15:21:00.000-07:00

Wow. 100 blog posts. That seems like...a lot...

I am struggling with the theme of this post. Should it be:
A) Race Recap of today's mermaid tri? It was a great event, but the fact I did the relay and my portion of the race was a 2.5 mile run does not seem to justify a whole blah blah-blog post.

B) The fear of this Saturday's swim event? 3.6 miles. No wetsuit. Open water. To quote Sixteen Candles, "Lake. Big Lake." Pool time since Big Kahuna? Um, one pool workout. Mainly because work has been--

C) Crazy. In a good way though. We had a big event on Friday and I found myself on-stage speaking to an audience of over 150 people. If you told me four years ago when I got laid off from the mortgage industry that I would be in the non-profit world and on a stage asking people for pledges I would have been all, "Say what?!" Don't get me wrong--it still terrifies the heck out of me being on stage addressing a crowd, but I somehow got through it.

Much like triathlons. And life...

And really, the truth is, challenges make life more interesting. Getting out of your comfort zone, pushing yourself, celebrating your successes and accepting your failures, constantly looking to the future of what is next...it's pretty cool.

A couple weeks ago I was taking a walk with my 7 year-old niece. She was talking about how she wants to be a teacher when she grows up. Then she asked me:

"What did you want to be when you grew up?"

I had to think.

"Um," I said. " A fashion designer. Or a child psychologist." (Yes, even at a young age I was all over the place. Not much has changed.)

"Is that what you are now?"

"No."

She looked at me a little disappointed. Or maybe it was surprise. "Why not?"

I thought about it. How do you explain this to a 7-year-old? I barely know how to explain it to myself.

"Well," I started slowly, "I think it is because when you get older, you start to see more things in the world. You discover other things that interest you."

She was not convinced.
"Not me. I am going to be a teacher no matter what."

"That's awesome!" I told her.

I think what is interesting that for me the adult version of "What do you want to be when you grow up?" had turned more into a "What do you want to be next?" And there are so many possibilities to that. An ironman? A person who can do one measley pull-up? A member of an improv comedy troup? A writer (like, a more than an occasional blog post writer)? A better friend? A better listener? A better leader? A better follower?

When you think about it, it's pretty exciting to think that there is a different "you" right around the corner...just depends on what path you take.

ew...i know...what's with all this positive thinking stuff. ick. What can I say? It's been a bit of an emotional week...and I think I am a hugger now...plus it IS my 100th post. I can be a little sappy, right?

Stick a Fork in Me...

2011-09-13T15:31:00.000-07:00

because Big Kahuna is DONE!

I had planned on writing my race recap on Monday when it was all fresh in my head. But then I woke up with a fever and sore throat which was a lovely combination with the ran over by a truck feeling from the race. So, I am at home now, pumped full of cough syrup, going through boxes of kleenex and finally writing this re-cap.

A couple months ago I emailed the Race Director of the event (actually, sent emails to 3 different email addresses) to change to Aquabike. My training was all over the place and I was stressing myself out. I did not hear back from them so I took it as a sign that I was supposed to do this race. In my heart, I did not want another year to go by where I didn't finish a 1/2 ironman.

So, my good friend Diane was gracious enough to attend packet pick-up with me. And of course, when they gave me my race chip and bib I saw that it said "Aquabike." I had a feeling that would happen. I kinda flipped out on the volunteer a little (not my best moment). This is basically how the conversation went:

Volunteer: Is there a problem?
Me: Uh, yeah. I e-mailed the race director to switch to aquabike-
Volunteer: So, you want to do aquabike?
Me: NO. See, I e-mailed them THREE Times (and yes, I put three fingers up) and hadn't heard back so I trained for the full (by training I mean, I swam a lot, did some bricks and posted on facebook A LOT) and now I find out they switched to aquabike.

The volunteer graciously took down my information and they said they would switch me to the full.

Fine then.

So, Saturday night I drank lots of gatorade, ate at Fresh Choice and had everything packed and ready to go in my car. I prepped the coffeemaker. I knew I had to leave the house at 4am(!) to get to transition in time and give myself plenty of time to find free parking.

Technically I was in bed by 8, but I couldn't fall asleep so I read from my Kindle. Finally around 9:30 I turned the light off. I woke up at 2 and though to myself, "I could totally get up now." but went back to sleep. Then at 3:15 I heard a ruckus and a MREOW! Our cat Lily broke into our bedroom and was going nuts. I got up and tried to steer her downstairs. She was at the foot of the stairs so I tried to pick her up. She was having none of that and strategicaly focused all of her weight to the ground making her seem like the heaviest 12 pound cat ever. And of course our kitten was going buck wild, "MWEOW MWREOW WHAT"S GOING ON? IS IT TIME TO EAT?"

I finally got everyone situated downstairs and put the coffee on. Dennis came stumbling down (did I mention it was 3:30 am) because the commotion woke him up. I got dressed, filled up my coffee maker and headed out.

I got to transition, set up my stuff and met up with my friend Molly. Around 6:15 we headed to the beach for the race talk. It was a little overcast, but the water was calm. My coach was the announcer so she gave me a pre-race pep talk. Molly and I went into the water for a warm up swim. Then we headed to the line to start. There were a bunch of people taking photographs and Molly joked that it was like the paparazzi, to which I responded, "What are you wearing? Neoprene." Yes, I use humor as a defense mechanism when I am nervous.

Our age group was the 4th to start. Finally it was our turn and we ran to the water. It took me awhile to find my stride in the water. It got a little crowded and I could feel my breath getting out of control. I remembered my talk with coach heidi earlier this week. She said that at some of the workouts she had noticed something new in me, an aggression that she hadn't see in her 3 years working with me. She wanted me to channel that aggression at this race and she called it my Big K face. So something happened within me that made me determined to school this ocean. I put power in my stroke, I knew I wanted to do this swim STRONG. It felt strong as well. In retrospect, I should have worn a watch during the swim because I really had no idea if I was going fast. In the open water I have a hard time gauging speed. I was out of the water and greeted by people cheeirng us on. I ran the couple blocks barefoot to the transition, high fived my fellow teammate who was volunteering at the event and yelled at Heidi who was announcing, "Heidi! I am here!" Before I knew it, I was on the bike. I looked at my watch and it was 10 minutes earlier than I anticipated. I MUST have had a good swim.

The bike was my biggest mental block for the event. I knew I had to get off the bike by 1pm or they would pull me. I had calculated what my MPH should be. The first half off the bike was amazing. I felt like I was at a strong pace, and the sun was starting to poke out and the view of the Pacific Ocean was incredible. Finally there was the turn around and then BAM the wind hit me. It was brutal. There were points of the ride where I was at 5 mph. My feet were starting to hurt, and sitting on the bike seat was getting more and more painful. I looked down at my garmin and it read 53 miles. I wanted to get in before noon. So, I pushed myself and broke free from the pack I was riding in. Finally I reached the bike dismount and was cheered on by my friends Wilma and Diane. I had a speedy transition and was on the run by 11:55.

THE RUN. It was bad. It was really really bad. I made sure to keep hydrated. My legs felt like bricks and it became pretty apparent I couldn't BS my way into a good run. I just wanted to finish. The run was my longest half marathon ever. At mile 12 I said to myself, "you are almost there. You can do this." The last part of the run is in the sand. When my tired feet hit the beach I knew that it was happening. I was going to finish something. I can't explain the significance of this. These past few years I have noticed my confidence in myself was declining. Not just as a triathlete, but as a person. I totally needed some Stewart Smalley in my life because I didn't feel good enough, smart enough and doggone it liked by people. As I crossed the finish line at a strong pace it was a reminder that yes, I am strong. I may not be the fastest out there or the fittest, but I am brave. I am brave enough to sign up for events that scare the crap out of me and brave enough to put on a sparkle skirt and show the world you can have fun with this too.

And you know what? I improved my time by 9 minutes from 2008's race. My swim time was 41 minutes! This is a PR for me and makes me want to break 40 minutes in the future. I maintained a 15 mph pace on my bike. Not too shabby. The run, well the run was just "meh."

But, I finished it and felt great. I was surrounded by friends and returned home to my amazing hubby who eventually support my crazy hairbrained ideas.

So there it is. The curse of the half ironman is broken. And you know what? Completing my 2nd half ironman was wayyyy better than my first.

6 Days...

2011-09-06T21:50:00.000-07:00

Until Big Kahuna Triathlon. The nerves are definitely starting to bubble to the surface. In fact, I baked two nights in a row to deal with my nervous energy. Fortunately, my husband's co-workers are more than happy to help me deal with my neurosis by taking one for the team and eating home baked goods.

So, it is what it is. I have had quite a few solid weeks of training under my belt. I did have some paranoia about the bike cut off, as I had flashbacks of being pulled from the race at last year's Wildflower. But, I will have to do the number crunching to figure out my sweet spot for mph on the bike and pay attention to that. The run...well, as my coach said, "The run will be the run."

In other news, something amazing happened this weekend. In addition to swimming, biking, running, celebrating my 5th wedding anniversary, and getting in some much needed family and friend time, I did something I NEVER had done before.

(wait for it)

I poached an egg.

Seriously, this is like an amazing feat for me. This past year I have mastered the creamiest scrambled eggs (the trick: melt butter in pan over low heat, while it melts whisk your eggs about a minute, and a tablespoon of milk and then whisk the eggs like crazy, to the point of your bicep hurting, then add to melted butter, let is sit 30 seconds, and every once in a while scrape the eggs around in the pan. slow. low heat. perfection!). For some reason I could not figure out how to poach eggs. The whites would separate and float all over the pan, or I would overcook the yolk. I even watched a Good Eats episode for guidance. One day I went through a whole carton of eggs with no success.

But something got into me Sunday morning. I wanted to make breakfast for hubby and didn't want to go to the store. I made mixed berry muffins from scratch, but used up the rest of the milk, so couldn't make scrambled eggs. I eyed the carton of eggs and grabbed my America's Test Kitchen cookbook with authority. You better watch out eggs, because today you are getting poached.

I analyzed the recipe and the accompanying picture for submerging the eggs in the water. I took a deep breath and got all the utensils ready. My skillet was filled to the brim with water and some vinegar. I set the temp high to get the water to boiling point. I took out two ramekins and cracked two eggs in both. I could feel beads of sweat forming at my forehead. Hubby came into the kitchen and asked in a cheerful voice, "What are you making?"

"I am poaching eggs."

"Whoa," he said and gradually inched backwards to make an escape. See, he was there through a majority of the poaching attempts and may still be a little traumatized by all the swearing.

The water was boiling, now time to reduce the heat. I gradually tipped the eggs into the water, put a lid on the skillet removed from the heat and set the timer for 5 minutes.

Longest. Five. Minutes. Ever.

Finally the "beep beep" came and I removed the lid, scared at what I was going to see. I carefully took rhe eggs out with a slotted spoon and placed two on a plate with a muffin and presented to hubby.

"So," I told him, "I think I did it. I think those are poached."

He cut into the egg with his fork and the right amount of yolk oozed out. He took a bite.

"Yup! Those are poached!"

Yay!

So, you are probably thinking what the heck do poached eggs have to do with a half ironman?

Well, I guess what I realized was that I poached the egg succesfully because I focused on all the steps. There is no room for error. My plan for Sunday: stay focused and in the NOW of the event. Every stroke of my swim will be deliberate.If I find myself slacking on the bike, I will evaluate my posture, ensure I am pushing through pedal strokes. On the run I will just keep my legs going and remind myself I have done 13 miles plenty of times. And that even though it feels like a long time, it's really about the same amount of time as a Transformers movie with previews in a theater (and I will repeat to myself that sitting through Transformes would prbably be more painful than the run). I will ensure that I drink water and eat enough on the bike. I have a couple friends who are making the trip to santa cruz just to cheer me on. How awesome is that?

My plan for Sunday? It really boils down to one thing: I plan to cross that finish line.

Tour of Napa Valley Ride Report

2011-08-22T10:55:00.001-07:00

I think I realized something key about my personality. I am in a state of perpetual New Year's Resolutions. Or rather, I have high aspirations for my future self. What does this mean? It means, I think that my future self will be this amazing together person, without taking into consideration the limitations of my present self.

Confused? Let me give you an example of something that happened just this morning.

While rushing out of the house to get to work, I only have my car key in my purse. The reason it is not on my regular key chain is because I took it off to keep with me during yesterday's Tour of Napa Bike Ride (more on that later). I couldn't for the life of me remember where my key chain with all my keys is. I searched my car, searched my purse, searched my triathlon bag---nothing. Just as I was about to lose it, the little light bulb went off-"Oh yeah!" I unzipped the front (mind you, rarely used) pocket of my tri bag and there they are. I distinctly remember thinking yesterday as I put them in that --rarely used--pocket, "I will DEFINITELY remember where I put these keys."

In my head, future self is much smarter than present self.

Another example would be the Tour of Napa ride which I registered back in June. I registered for the 100 mile option, thinking I would be nice and ready for it, because future self must be a bike training machine, right?

Not quite. Though I have biked pretty regularly in the last month, this year I have not topped over 30 miles. So, I decided to switch to the 65 mile option. I mean, I did 200 miles in one day last year, surely this will be cake for future self.

Um. Yeah. It was NOT cake. It was a big old slice of humble pie.

I woke up at 4:45 to drive to Napa yesterday. I met my friend at the start in Yountville and we were on the road by 7:30. We felt good. Our average mph was my goal mph and I was feeling strong the first 10 miles. And then she said, "What's that noise?"

"Oh yeah," I said acknowledging the rhythmic rrrrrring noise, "I hear that too. I don't know."

"Do you have a flat?"

"Nah, doesn't sound like a flat. I would know---uh oh, yeah we gotta pull over. I have a flat."

Twenties minutes and lots of grease everywhere, the flat was changed and we were back on the road.

And my spirit was slightly dampened.

We rode more. It was beautiful, taking us through wine country. The temperature was perfect, overcast but not super cold. One stretch of road was pretty tore up and a challenge to ride because of bumps and cracks. At mile 20 we had a slight climb. I read that there were two climbs on this ride.

We stopped at the rest stop at mile 34. I ate half a turkey sandwich and a fig newton. I was pretty beat already. My friend (whom I did Seattle to Portland with) and I were tripping over the fact that this was our first Century bike ride of the year. Last year, we were at this distance by March. And why was it so hard? So far, my theory on muscle memory is starting to lose its credibility.

We took off. It was hill time. At this point in the ride we got separated (she is faster than me). This hill was a bit of a beast. I would say it was about 4-5 miles of climbing. It was called Howell's hill and I thought it was an appropriate name considering some parts of my body were howling. The people on the ride were very friendly. Everyone LOVED pink bike. However, one guy passed me. On. the. Right. Um, hello? Oh, and another guy was riding slowly up the hill. As I passed him I looked over and saw him on his cell phone. Seriously?

Finally the hill was over and we went downhill a little. I stopped at the water stop to fill my bottle. My legs were thrashed. I got back on my bike and realized I was still in the easy granny gear and my wheels were spinning. I couldn't get a hold of my bike and gradually started to tip over almost falling into a group of hardcore cyclist who were standing around.

Smooth move.

I headed back out on the road. Now was time for the downhill. It was crazy. At one point to the right of me I could see the whole Napa Valley ( I tried to take a picture but my cell phone camera skills leave a lot to be desired). It was a long downhill, and I took it as easy as possible but at some points I was at 30 mph (for me that is fast!). There were some sharp turns and towards the end a really gnarly hairpin. There was a stop sign at the bottom of the hill and one guy looked to his buddy and said, "That was INTENSE."

Yup. It was.

The last 20 miles of the ride was pure torture. Every part of me was in pain from my shoulders to my feet. I hit some wind. Would this ride ever end? Never again, I thought to myself, will I wait until August to bike this far. Oh, and perhaps gradually I will get to this mileage. My future self will train much better.

I was at the finish and met up with my friend. We ate some food, and then headed on our separate way.

It was a great event in terms of scenery, support, and a minimal number of cars on the road. Not so great in terms of the reality of where I am at right now with my bike fitness. Next year will be a different story.

Right, future self?

Water Water Everywhere

2011-08-15T12:10:00.000-07:00

I think I may have gotten a little delirious after the event high from last weekend's awesome Silicon Valley Open Water Swim. I made an impulsive decision to register for a Lake Tahoe Swim. It was this past Saturday. I convinced my friend (I think we may be event registration enablers) to sign up as well. We went back and forth. Do we drive up Friday, do the event Saturday and come back? Do we drive up Saturday, and drive back Sunday? We wanted to bike that weekend as well, but didn't want to deal with leaving our bikes out during the swim. The logistics were hurting our brains. So we decided that I would drive to Sacramento (where she lives) after work on Friday. We would wake up super duper early Saturday, do the swim and then drive back after.

Yes, we decided to go to Lake Tahoe and back in one day.

Um, yes. We are crazy.

We woke up at 3:30(!). We actually got to Lake Tahoe at 6. Not too bad. However, the event website wasn't the most user friendly and we weren't sure exactly where it was. Her GPS took us on a wild goose chase through a campground, but miraculously we found Day parking and a trail to the beach. Yay! Except when we got to the beach, it wasn't super obvious there was an event. We finally found registration. I gave the woman my USAT card and she asked me, "Wetsuit or non-wetsuit?" My friend and I exchanged enabling glances. See, I had brought my wetsuit but I didn't want to wear it. But everyone was telling me that the water was cold at Tahoe.

But, I saw the look in my friend's eyes and I knew my answer.

I sighed, "No wetsuit."

Um, yes. We are crazy.

She gave us markers to write our race numbers on our limbs. DIY body marking--gotta love a grass roots event.

We got to the shore and gingerly stepped into the water. I may have sworn a little. It was cold! Am I a total idiot for doing this? We swam around a little bit and then got out because it was still 40 minutes before the event started. We headed to the beach for the pre-race talk. The race director talked about the courses. They had 3 options: 1/2 mile, 1 mile, and 2 mile. We signed up for the two mile. Unlike last week's event--which was two one mile loops---this was an out and back event. Here is basically how the race director described the course:

"Ok, for the half mile swim you want to swim around that buoy, at the second buoy make a right and head to the finish."

Ok, the second buoy looked close. Not too bad.

"For the one miler you want to go past the first two buoys and turn around at the third buoy."

I squinted my eyes and finally was able to see the last buoy. Um, that looks far.

"Ok, for the 2 mile swim you want to go past that last buoy and turn around at the buoy further out."

Um, what buoy?

As if reading my mind, he said "You can't see it from here."

Gulp.

Um, yes. We are crazy.

The swim started. Brrrrrr! It was a long swim. It felt long because it took a long time until the turnaround buoy was visible. I kept expecting myself to get warm, but it remained consistently cold. Then I would hit warm parts and would freak out a little. I remembered one of my friends telling me that when you die from hypothermia you actually feel warm all over. (note: I have not researched this. Just repeating what someone told me).

So then I started thinking "OMG! DO I HAVE HYPOTHERMIA?"

Well, duh, of course I didn't have it. It was just the ridiculous mental freakout that is similar to when I am in the ocean and touch seaweed: "OMG! IS THAT A SHARK?"

There were only 20 of us doing the 2 mile option and I was definitely one of the slowest. So, basically I was swimming in Tahoe by myself. Except the size of the race meant that one of the volunteer kayakers was with me the whole time. THAT was awesome. At the final buoy I stopped and he said, "Just a straight shot to the finish."

"Am I last?" I asked him.

"No."

"It's fine if I am. Someone has to be last. I have no ego issues being THAT person..." Ok Jill, just shut up and swim.

And I did. AND I MADE IT AND DIDN'T GET HYPOTHERMIA. AND I WASN'T LAST. (I was second to last).

My friend was there cheering me on. She got 1st and I got 2nd in our age group. And yes, it was only the two of us. But I happily took my pint glass that read "BIG BLUE ADVENTURES 2nd."

In summary, an AMAZING swim. . The water was clear, beautiful and tranquil. I was actually worried about the elevation affecting my breathing, but it wasn't a problem at all. In fact, I checked results today and my swim was 3 minutes faster than last week's time. WHAHOO!

OK, so the only issue with all of these events I have done is only ONE was in the ocean. I probably should snap out of my denial and get in there at some point before Big Kahuna, right?

Right.

That's Gonna Leave a Mark: Silicon Valley Open Water Swim Race Report

2011-08-08T12:24:00.000-07:00

The key to get to the podium at events? Do events where there are only three people in your age group. Yup---at yesterday's SwimOutlet.com Open Water Swim I somehow managed to get 1st place for non-wetsuit females in my age group. ME? First place? At something related to swimming? Hilarious!

I giddily accepted the bottle of Two Buck Chuck wine as my prize (seriously, how awesome is that? I may have to put that in my wine cellar to commemorate this victory. Hah! Like I have a wine cellar). The woman who got 3rd place posed with me for a picture. She was super cute because she was just as surprised as I was for placing. Her eyes got all big as she said, "Oh my gosh I wasn't even going to swim today!"

Honestly though, I didn't sign up for non-wetsuit because I thought I would increase my odds of placing. I plan to do the Slam the Dam 3.6 mile swim in October without a wetsuit because the temperature is supposed to be pretty warm, so figured I should see what it is like. I was actually a little nervous about the swim since the longest I have swam in open water was probably 1.5 miles.

Swimming without a wetsuit was AMAZING! I just loved that each stroke felt natural, I could breathe normally, and I didn't have the sore shoulder issues I have been having in my wetsuit.

I was super scared of swimming without a wetsuit mainly because of the other swimmers. For some reason the wetsuit makes me feel like I have some protection. I have a fear of someone doing breaststroke and kicking me so my knee dislocates and then I will flail around and a lifeguard will come rescue me and then I will have to go to the ER.

In my head, the wetsuit would protect me from dislocations.

Fortunately, no injuries like that. However, I didn't anticipate scratching. In the open water it is pure aquatic Armageddon and everyone gets all up in your business. I literally felt someone scratch their claws in me as they were attempting to do a freestyle stroke. "Ow," I thought to myself, "That's going to leave a mark."

The swim was two loops in the Stevens Creek Reservoir. The first mile loop was ok. I still haven't figured out how to swim faster in the open water. About halfway through the second loop the strangest thing happened. I got totally disoriented. The reservoir is surrounded by trees and everything looks the same, and all of the sudden I had a, "Where the heck am I?" kind of feeling. I can't explain it. I can only compare it to those times where you are driving home and you can't remember driving to a certain point. Minds are weird.

Of course what makes these events so great is getting to do them with my peeps. Some of my workout buddies did it, along with one of my friends whom I did Seattle to Portland with last year. Her and I actually decided to do an easy ride after the race. I forgot how hardcore she is, so our definition of "easy" differed. To me, "easy" was a 5 mile ride. To her, "easy" was 25 or 30 miles. We did 22, and kicked up the pace the last half. It was awesome to be able to push one another.

It was great to have a successful event coming from the heels of another fun event (last week's International Triathlon). 2009 and 2010 were a little lackluster in terms of my enjoyment of events. I think I was trying desperately to get back that feeling I had the first couple of years of tris. But with anything in life, trying to replicate something in the past will only set you up for disappointment in the present. I think I was way hard on myself the past couple of years thinking that success was defined by a time. I may never do a half marathon in under two hours. Does that mean it isn't worth it to do these things? Last week was the slowest I have ever done that distance in, but it still felt fantastic. It feels great to know that I can move past literally crying on the track two weeks ago to having fun at events again.

So the goal for the rest of the year? Brace yourself because it is going to sound way hippie and new agey. I just want to, like, live in the moment man. Take the water in. See the world from the seat of a bicycle. Feel myself connecting with the trail.

Oh goodness gracious. Where did THAT come from? Did I mention I have been without cable tv for 6 weeks? Perhaps my lack of reality television viewing has chipped away some of my cynicism? If I start wearing Patchouli oil, please please please have an intervention. Yikes.

Pink Bike Blog

2011-08-02T11:20:00.000-07:00

As posted on my FB status, today marks the three year anniversary of bike crash/mild concussion/awesome road rash for cred with bike shop dudes at my first attempt at a half-ironman at Barb's Race.

Rather than rehash those details, I am doing what hubby told me I should have done months ago.

Write about Pink Bike.

Last year after the grueling Seattle to Portland Bike Ride hubby decided I probably didn't want to look at my bike anymore and ordered a new PINK bike frame to build a road bike for me.

Awww, so cute, right? He must love me lots.

He does. But, I think he wanted an excuse to play bikes and have random bike parts strewn all across our living room and be all manly building something. He has jokingly referred to himself as OCT. He is not OCD. He just has Obsessive Compulsive Tendencies. Pink Bike Project gave him the opportunity to make a super matchy matchy bike with white accents (pink carbon frame? check. White bottle cage? Check? Pink Duct Tape? Check) and get all type A. I have to admit, the end product was pretty amazing. I love that my bike is super unique.

A couple of months ago as I was driving home from the Mermaid Alameda tri with pink bike on my rack, I did not realize hubby was behind me on the street before the turn to our townhouse. After we parked our cars and met each other in the driveway he said:

"That bike is really pink."

I said, "Uh yeah, I know. And you should too...you built it!"

He said, "Yeah, but when it is on your car bike rack in broad daylight...it is just...pink. Like, PINK pink."

And THAT is usually one of two reactions I get. It's either glee ("ohmagawdiluvyourpinkbikeitssewwwawesomeiwantone") or contained horror ("That is one pink bike.").

Either one works for me.

So in conclusion---YAY PINK BIKE! BOOO BIKE CRASHES!

California International Triathlon - Race Report

2011-08-01T13:15:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the California International Triathlon in Pleasanotn and I survived! Yay!

This was my first time doing this distance since the Silicon Valley International Triathlon in June of 2008. Long story short, I did this one 30 minutes slower than that one. But, 3 years ago was a different Jill.

A couple friends and I decided to stay in Pleasanton the night before since it was a 7am start. We went to packet pick up, browsed some cool shops in downtown Pleasanton, and ate at a super yummy Italian restaurant. One of these days I will do a race with proper nutrition the night before. This...was not that race.

The hotel was nice, except for the swarms of little kids in town for some sort of soccer tournament. Our room faced the pool and at 10:15 at night there was cackling, and hooting, hollering and the sounds of teenagers having fun. Yuck. I got upset and said, "They are in the pool past pool hours. This is not ok." My friend Diane called the front desk, "Excuse me, what time does the pool close? oh...11pm. Thank you." So, I got off my high horse and waited patiently for 11pm.

I will skip all the boring stuff about waking up, setting up transition, blah blah blah. Let's get to the race.

Swim: 36 minutes the swim was ok. The water was warm. My shoulders seem sore during the swim and I am wondering if it is time to switch to a sleeveless wetsuit. There were parts of the swim that got congested. At one point I felt someone grab on to my middle toe and deliberately pull it hard. What the heck? I kicked hard as if saying, "Not cool bro. Not cool." Or would it be, "not cool sis?"

Bike:1:41 minutes The bike was a little chilly with only a sleeveless bike jersey. There was a long annoying hill, and some sketchy parts of the road with glass and other fun flat-tire causing debris. I kept playing the "you pass me, I pass you" game with this one annoying cyclist. At one point I yelled on your left and as I was shoulder to shoulder with him he hammered on his pedals to go faster. Not cool bro. So I backed off, put my hand out in front of me and barked at him, "FINE! GO THEN!" And then I may or may not have mumbled some swear words. Sometimes I think the men don't like being passed by a pink bike.
I think I could have done the bike faster. I think going forward I will only have a garmin during the bike portion (past few races I have been technology free) as I think I can maintain a faster MPH.

Run: 1:14 OK...a slow 10k. But, I am a little out of practice running 6 miles after 25 mile bike. The run was hard. There were some hills, it got hot, and they did not mark any miles except mile 1. But, for the first time in a long time on a run I was enjoying myself. I mean, I was in pain, definitely need new shoes, and was drooling over a massage I booked for the following night. But I felt good (ish).

Overall time was 3:37. I am totally fine with it considering I haven't been religiously training. And, I think I kinda have a crush on International distances. They are just more interesting than sprints.

Because, in the end, aren't we all just doing this because it is fun?

2011-07-24T15:07:00.000-07:00

Oh triathlon...why can't I quit you? What is it about you that is addictive, joyful and disappointing?

This Sunday I will be competing in the California International triathlon in Pleasanton. Some interesting facts: the last time I did this distance (.9 mile swim, 25 mile bike, 6.2 mile run) was 3 years ago at the Silicon Valley Triathlon; I will be swimming this Sunday in the same exact lake where I did my VERY first triathlon four years ago. FOUR YEARS. Thank goodness I have a blog as a record of (most) of those four years. Otherwise, events may get all blurry.

I remember that triathlon. I had no idea about racking your bike and transitions and race etiquette. I remember thinking that the swim would be fine, because I swam laps all the time as a kid. But then when the race started and there were legs and arms coming at me in all directions, I was like, "Wait...what? What the heck is this, because this doesn't seem like swimming to me." The bike was ok. I had only had my very first road bike for a month, so it was still new to me. Then the run. I laced up my shoes exited the transition and was like, "Huh? What's wrong with these legs? Why does it feel like I am running in sand?" I finished the race feeling totally bewildered by the torture I put my body through in something called a "tri for fun."

So, of course I was hooked.

I was so hooked I signed up for another triathlon a month later. An Olympic triathlon. Roughly twice the distance of the sprint triathlon I did. And it was in the ocean. The OCEAN. But I did it and had a blast.

Fast forward to almost four years later. Last week to be exact. I was on the track Tuesday night with my awesome workout group for our monthly two mile test.

And I was crying.

Yes, I said it. Crying.

Brace yourself, because this is going to start getting real.

Ok, maybe not that extreme. I was actually inspired to write this after reading another tri-person's blog today where it seemed like she was having similar issues.

Sooooo. Back to the tears. The initial issue was my feet and the blisters from the dip and dash. Plus, my sunscreen got in my eyes. So, I ran the first mile at an ok pace, but my feet and eyes were burning. I turned my watch off and told my coach that my feet hurt and I was done. She looked at me, smiled and said, "Go finish." I said, "My FEEEEEET HURRRRRT." She smiled, "Run slower."

So I kept running, because when coach tells you to do something you do it. After 3+ years with her, the trust is definitely there.

Except.

My feet hurt.

And sunscreen was burning my eyes.

And, my legs were tired from the run on the dip and dash.

And then, internally, I kind of started to lose it. Kind of like this.

I wasn't mad about my feet or my eyes. It was more that I was dragging on the run. And that it is 6 weeks to Big Kahuna and my training? Yeah...not exactly happening. I kept saying to myself, "Why am I here again?"

Basically, lots of little things kind of built up over the past 5 months that made it a little too easy to cut myself some slack on the training. But then Tuesday track workout came and it looked like I was going to run two miles slower than the first test back in February. After one and a half miles I could tell I was going to lose it. And I thought to myself, "I could get in my car right now. I could quit this workout group. Why am I here? This is pointless. There is limited free time in the world and I am spending it doing something that is possibly going to make me cry?"

I told you. It's getting real.

So I begrudgingly finished my 2 miles.

Coach cheered me on.

And, then she came up to me to chat.

And the waterworks started.

I don't even know what the tears were about. I just didn't know what my problem was. Why couldn't I integrate my training workouts into the rest of my life so I could have solid race results? There are people out there with real - non-triathlon-related - problems. There are amazing women I know who can "Do it all" meaning job, families, training and I just...couldn't. Wouldn't?

Coach let me cry. (I call it my "biggest loser" moment. Meaning, if the workout was an episode of biggest loser, that week's episode would have focused on me, my breakdown and before the commerical break there will be scenes of me losing it and a voice over narrator saying, "is this the last week for Jill?") She talked me through it in the most perfect coach way. She told me to have patience with myself. And that my breakdown wasn't about tri training.

And I knew that. So, she let me acknowledge that I may have overbooked myself. I need to find the balance, and my version of "doing it all" is different from other people's. And maybe it is ok to not be able to "do it all."

When I discovered triathlon 4 years ago, it was probably (OK, definitely) because I knew I needed something. It became abundantly clear that the industry I was in was crashing and burning (see: subprime mortgage meltdown, 2007), and triathlon gave me a sense of purpose and control that I was craving. Now, ironically, triathlon was making me feel out of control.

So, I am going to cut myself some slack and figure out what I am doing. And really, the truth is I registerred for a half ironman triathlon (which I have done before) and a 3.6 mile open water swim (which i have never done before) within weeks of each other. And, perhaps that was not the wisest idea.

So, I have some thinking to do. And I know I will make the right choice.

Because, in the end, aren't we all just doing this because it is fun?

Dip Dashing Away...

2011-07-18T11:34:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the inaugural Dip and Dash event in Santa Cruz. It was a 750 yard swim at Cowell's Beach followed by a 4 mile run. And, guess what? Yours truly got 2nd Place in my Age Group. Though, truth be told, there were only two people in my age group. But I will TAKE it. Yeah baby!

Anyways, I don't really have a huge race report for this one. But here are some tidbits and random thoughts:

1. Because it was a small race, they didn't order t-shirts. Some people have beef with this. For the most part, I am pretty ambivalent about race t-shirts. The mermaid events have the best t-shirts, with nike 1/2 marathon coming in at 2nd. Realistically, I will probably be selling my race t-shirts at a garage sale for 5 for a quarter. Plus, the race organizers gave away water bottles in the goodie bags. This is way more beneficial to me seeing as I have probably lost 20 water bottles in three years. It has gotten to the point where my husband has a secret stash of water bottles so I can't lose his. For some reason I lose socks, water bottles, and sunglasses.

2. I swam in the ocean without panicking (much). I think my issue is the cold water and trying to breathe. I need to make it a point to spend time in the water 15 minutes before a race to acclimate better. But when I first jumped in my breathing was out of control and I started getting that familiar panicky feeling of "I need to get outta here NOW." But I somehow managed to push through it.

3. For some reason I thought a 4 mile run would be a great opportunity to try running without socks. Um, blister city, population: my feet. My run was brutal because my feet were on fire. DUMB DUMB DUMB.

4. This is going to sound silly, but, during the race we were running on the sidewalk so people were watching us run. I overheard one woman say to another, "There must be some sort of marathon going on." It just really bugs me when people just think a marathon is ANY distance. IT'S NOT. And people, a TRIATHLON involves (a majority of the time) SWIMMING. There are have been quite a few times where I tell people, "I did a triathlon in Santa Cruz." And then they are shocked when I say there was swimming. I don't know why it bugs me, but it does.

5. Post Race Festivities: Bloody Mary's at Ideal Cafe for Brunch and a ride on the Big Dipper. Just awesome.

6. Also, I think more events need to be on Saturdays. It is just kind of a bummer to go back to the real world the next day.

7. On Saturday, I put a race day countdown app on my Facebook page. Is it really 55 days till Big Kahuna? Seriously?

Next on the agenda: Splash and Dash 1 mile swim on Sunday at Uvas. Then in a week, it is a (gulp) Olympic Distance Triathlon.

"This (expletive) is Just Mean."

2011-07-08T06:39:00.000-07:00

Oh, Splash and Dash...will you ever get easier?

Thursday was the summer's #2 Splash and Dash, and we actually had REAL summer weather this time. What a concept!

Some interesting stuff happened since the last Splash and Dash in June: I did a tri, we went on vacation, we got a kitten, hubby crashed his motorcycle and had shoulder and hand surgery. Training was going fairly well until that last thing happened. But, life happens and I am so thankful that is all he hurt. Of course, I can't get all indignant and tell him, "You sell that motorcycle NOW" because from time to time I do crazy things like long bike rides, wacky swims, or signing up for events where I don't train. So, yeah I can't get all high and mighty.

I was all set to get to the event on time as the parking can be a little funky. As I was walking to my car from work I got a call from hubby, "Kitten is sick, She has some eye thing. We gotta take her to the vet." Which translates to "you gotta take her to the vet" since he only has one working arm right now. So, I tried not to get annoyed (it has been one of those kinds of weeks where the stress seeps out of my pores) and called the vet to see if they could take me that night. Splash and Dash 2: Revenge of the Splash was looking like it wouldn't happen. Unfortunately, they couldn't take her until Friday morning. My tone with them got all mama bear (cat?) as I said, "But she's a KITTEN. Wil she be ok?" the receptionist said, "Well, is she lethargic?" I looked down at the latest scratches on my arm from when she pounced on me, "Um, no." "Loss of appetite?" Hah! She wolfs down her wet food like it's crack. "She should be fine." So, I got clearance to splash and dash!

My focus on this event was the swim. I just need to swim straigher. If I can do that,I think my times will improve. I really focused on my breathing, my stroke, trying to catch other people's drafts, and actually swimming towards the buoy. One of the buoy's was impossible to see as it was right in line with the sun. but, my swim was MUCH better than last. Almost 6 minutes faster to be precise! Though I must say, after the first lap I started panicking a little at the fact that in 3 months I would be doing a 3.6 mile swim. That seems, like, really hard.

The run...well, that wasn't so great. As I headed out on the trail, my calves started cramping big time from the swim. It felt like I had a tennis ball under my skin that was trying to burst out. I was doing ok until the first major hill, and then my energy depleted. My legs were not going as fast as I wanted.Ttowards the end there is a mother of a hill (just seems like a big wall to climb) and this guy passed me shouting, "This sh** is just mean." Amen brother. I did the run 3 minutes slower. Oh well. But, the mermaids were there again in full force, coach Heidi was announcing, and you just can't beat how awesome it is to hear them cheering me on at the finish line. And I am ready for victory at Splash and Dash 3: the Demonic Dash in a month.

That's it for now. Gotta lure a kitten into her carrier and take her to the vet now. Good times.

Mermaid Triathlon - A Race Report, AKA Don't Mess with Pink Bike

2011-06-20T12:38:00.001-07:00

eeek...almost two weeks after the Mermaid Alameda Triathlon and now I post? Sheesh! It isn't really fresh in my mind right now, so I will do my best to summarize.

1) Coffee: Or rather, lack thereof. I wanted to be at transition at 6, which meant leaving the house at 5:15. Which meant waking up at 4:45. Which meant too much of a pain to make coffee at that hour. So, I figured drive to Jack n the Box for coffee. Aren't they open 24 hours? Apparently, not all of them. I drove around for about 20 minutes tryng to get a stupid cup of coffee. 7-11 would have made more sense. And no caffeine is not an option.

2) Goal: this wasn't an A race for me, and all I really wanted was to beat last year's time. Last year I was suuuuuper slow because I did it the day after the Sierra Century and my tushie was howling. Last year's Triathlon was the one where my so-called "friend" lapped me on the bike and yelled out, "That's what I am talking about?" Couldn't she see the pain I was in on the bike? But, I am totally over her comment...took a year...But this tri is pretty easy, flat, short distance...so I figured I could rock it. Speaking of

3) Rocks: the swim entry was brutal. The "beach" at Alameda was way rocky, and I was super afraid of slipping on rocks because coordination is not one of my skillz. We had to walk down a ramp to get in the water. Once I gingerly stepped on a couple of rocks and realized at that rate it would take me an hour to get in the water, I decided to sit down, get on my belly and scooch my way into the water. Not very ladylike. I kinda got scraped up and bloody. But I was in the water!

4)Swim: This was one crazy, bouncy swim. The waves were way crazy and my sighting was not great. Swim time was slower than last year's. Oh well.

5)Bike: Wait...before I talk about that, I need to talk to about...

6)Annoying people in transition: Despite the coffee drama, I was able to get my transition stuff ready early and on a relatively empty rack. I went to go check in with my workout group, came back and saw a very bulky mountain bike next to my pristine pink bike that Dennis painstakingly built for me. The beast was practically spooning my precious girl! And then someone else's bags and shoes were in front of my transition gear. I already have space issues, and I could feel myself getting stressed and my neck getting blotchy. And one of the pedals of the mountain bike was pressing against one of my running shoes. Uh, hello? Common courtesy people. I moved my bike a couple inches away from the mountain bike and tried my hardest not to make a snappy comment or give a dirty look. It was probably her first tri, but I didn't feel up to giving a transition area lecture. Seriously, there are a few things I value. Dennis. Friends. Family. Kitties. Pink Bike. Don't mess with pink bike.

7) Bike: so, after the swim (and after the dizziness from said swim eventually wore off...seriously that swim was crazy). I got on the bike. I haven't biked a whole lot this year, so wasn't expecting much, but I felt super fast in the beginning. I was passing people, felt strong, felt like I was going to rock the bike. At the turnaround it all became clear as to why I was going so fast.

8) Wind. Yeah, not so fast coming back. But it was super awesome to see mermaid buddies out there on the bike.

9) Honestly, I am totally blanking on the run. Oh well.

10) Post race was fun. We all hung out, got the 15 minute free massages. The ladies on Team Mermaid are such an amazing group of women, all bonded together by the wonderful coaches, Heidi and Kelly. Also, quite a few people on our team placed, which made me feel like I placed. Well, not really. But super awesome when we all cheered for them!

11) Vacation: That night hubby and I took off for a week long trip to Cozumel. It was a great trip, and the tri was a cool way to get in vacay mode.

So, for fun, here are the comparisons from 2010 and 2011:

Swim
2010 11:16
2011 11:45

Bike
2010: 51:50
2011: 44:11 (4th fastest in age group!)

Run
2010: 28:30
2011: 27:01

Overall Time
2010: 1:37:29
2011: 1:28:38

Almost 9 minutes faster this year! Not too shabby.

Splash and Dash #1--- a recap!

2011-06-03T21:07:00.001-07:00

Last night was the first Splash and Dash of the year which means one thing: it's getting close to summer time.

Except it's June 3 and I wore tights today. Tights!

Spring did not happen this year. And yesterday's race was a cold beast.

I did this race last year. It is held the first Thursday of June, July, and August at Stevens Creek Reservoir. The race starts at 6pm, is a .9 mile swim and 5k trail run. I met up with my mermaid pals at the race, and set up the worlds most disorganized transition. I pulled my wetsuit out and remembered, "Oh yeah, I forgot to rinse this off after Monday's Ocean swim" (more on that later). We got into the reservoir ( a little chilly) and waited for the race start. And then we were off.

The swim was two loops, and was a little choppy. I chose the race to try out my brand new goggles, as I had massive goggle issues on Monday's swim (again, more on that later). The Aquasphere goggles were amazing, I had never had such great sighting, though I still swam crooked. However, I didn't quite have them on right and every once in awhile water would get in.

I finished the swim and got to transition, took wetsuit off, put on a cotton shirt over my tri-shirt and headed out to the run. Yes, I said "cotton." Uh, durrrr...not a smart choice. My shirt was soaked the whole run.

The run was hard, but I felt strong. The swim was difficult too, but I felt strong. I felt my potential--that if I keep doing the workouts my coach tells me and don't have junk training days, maybe I could be race ready.

The great thing about these races is you really do get to race yourself. I can use the June race as a benchmark for the remaining races and see if I improved. Plus, it ends with pizza!

So, onto Monday's swim. I met up with some friends for an ocean swim in Santa Cruz. It was super cold in the water. When we got in, we all shrieked and put off putting our heads in until the last minute. It felt like needles were stabbing the non-wetsuit covered portions of my body. My goggles were thrashed. I think the coating came off and they got majorly fogged. I felt paralyzed and blind. My friend Diane kept asking me if I was ok. I was not ok. I could feel the panicky, hard to breathe sensation that I experience last March and told her I was heading back. I swam back, tried to control my breathing, tried not to freak out, and --most of all--tried not to get super irritated. What is up with this? I swam EVERY single day in Maui last month and was as happy as could be (seriously, my hubby nicknamed me labrador because of my eagerness to jump into the ocean). But the cold ocean here was become something to fear. I have never had this issue before.

So, the answer to this issue? Swim more. Swim more in my wetsuit and in the open water. And maybe sign up for a crazy swim as a goal to get into the water more?

Hmmmm...perhaps. I do have a swim in mind. Stay tuned. It isn't official until I register.

Soggy Sock: A Morgan Hill Sprint Triathlon Recap

2011-05-16T09:16:00.000-07:00

New rule: Any triathlon in the rain does not count. It is to merely be looked at as a long and annoying workout. However, said rule can be revoked if, by a miracle, one manages to PR during a rainy triathlon.

I, however, did not PR at Sunday's Morgan Hill Tri.

This was a tough tough race for me. Which is strange, because this is my 4th year in a row doing it. I was very cocky before the swim, thinking that all my open water swimming in Maui a couple weeks ago would give me an advantage. But alas, no. I have not gotten the hang of swimming in a wetsuit and regulating my breathing. Plus my goggles are a piece of *&#@ and were fogged the entire time. At one point in the swim I thought it was strange that I was swimming alone. So I stopped, took my goggles off and saw I was swimming pretty much right next to the island and everyone was wayyyyy far away. I got out of the water and it was pouring! Once I got to transition I saw everything was soaked. I put one soggy sock on and just started laughing at the absurdity of it and said aloud: "Are you kidding me?" The people in my transition were not as amused.

The bike was hard for a couple of reasons. I haven't biked outside all that much. Also, biking in the rain is nerve racking. I was super cold as well. Fortunately I was wearing my Seattle to Portland Ride biking jacket to keep my top part dry. I wore it the rest of the triathlon and would look down at the logo on the arm sleeve and think to myself, "Ok, so this race may not be going so well, but I was able to ride 200 miles in one day. Don't give up Jill."

The run was hard, but I ran the first 2 1/2 miles with my friend Diane. We chatted abd ate stale Jelly Bellies. That was nice.

I had forgotten how HARD triathlons are. Isn't that strange? When I was driving home I was thinking about why it was so hard. Then it dawned on me--the last full triathlon I did was the first weekend of June of LAST year. All the other events I did were either relays or Splash and Dashes. Last summer I was in full on Seattle to Portland mind frame, so it was kind of all about the bike.

It was great coming into the finish and having all my workout buddies cheering me on. That felt nice. And the burritos at the finish were AMAZING.

So all in all, a pretty good workout (NOT RACE) yesterday. But, um, Weather--- you need to get your act together ASAP. No more of these soggy sock races again, k?

Lessons Learned

2011-05-07T22:31:00.000-07:00

So...for the first time in almost 3 years I actually had...drumroll please...a GREAT race!

Three years ago was when I had a fire lit under me and was hooked on races. I did the mermaid half marathon and had a PR, had a blast at the Uvas and Silicon Valley Triathlons. That was probably the peak of my self discipline in training.

Though I have done some pretty rock and roll things (Alcatraz swim, Big Kahuna Half Iron, Seattle to Portland bike ride), those events all felt pretty difficult. Deep down I had a feeling if I had dedicated more time to training, I could have performed better.

All the other races I did were fun, but I didn't necessarily train, or partake in ideal pre-race behavior (hello Vegas half marathon!).

So, I did the Mermaid 10k last Saturday and though it was far from a PR, it was still a great race. and I actually learned a lot about myself in training, preparation, and mental focus.

I was supposed to do the 5k, but changed to the 10k as my afternoon plans fell through. Because I wasn't mentally prepped for a 10k, I didn't put pressure on myself on a specific time. But, I also knew I wanted to be ready on race day so i got plenty of sleep, hydrated, and ate well.

When the race started I still wasn't sure what I was doing pace-wise, but I just ran. And I ran fairly fast (for me) at the beginning of the race. I usually am conservative in the beginning with speed, but something clicked. And honestly, the first 3 miles felt FANTASTIC. I was running fast enough that I couldn't carry a conversation, but also at a pace that felt like I could run forever at. It was way weird.

I wasn't wearing a watch, but all the track workouts with me workput groups were for training our inner clock and being more aware of what certain paces feel like. I had a secret time in my head that I would be thrilled with, but I think I need to put more time in to break an hour for a 10k.

I think what helped me with this race was the spontaneity of the distance, and not putting pressure on myself to PR. And, learning lessons from other races that all the stuff you do the days leading before the race matter as well.

This Sunday is Uvas tri. At this point, I really do not have an idea of how I will do. I have only done a brick workout once in my training, BUT I did a ton of open water swimming when I was in Hawaii a couple weeks ago. This will be one interesting race.

If Goldilocks were a triathlete....

2011-05-05T14:10:00.000-07:00

The Mermaid East Bay run is this Saturday in Fremont. I originally signed up for the half marathon. But then I switched to the 5k because I was hosting a bridal shower in the afternoon. But then I found out this week we need to postpone the shower so I switched to 10k.

So, I am officially goldilocks. Let's hope this one is juuuuuust right.

I don't have a huge plan for it, and am not going to even think the phrase PR. I have the Uvas tri next week and that is more of an "A" race.

A-Choo! The movie/TV/post

2011-04-17T16:47:00.001-07:00

No training last week because I caught hubby's Armageddon-like cold. I haven't been THAT sick in quite some time. I mean, between the 2 of us we went through 8 boxes of Kleenex. It was also that awful sickness that seems to affect the brain, where counting and words are hard. Ugh. The one amusing part was when I would tell a joke to hubby who was feeling better, but still had a cough, his laugh sounded a lot like Muttley's .

So, instead of training and going to work, I was wiped out on the couch zoning out on TV. I watched a little Oprah, lots or Real Housewives, and some random movies. So, for the sake of having nothing triathlon related to post about--except for the fact that I went to the mall today and was exhausted by walking round trip from nordtrom's to macy's, I figured what better time than now to do some TV and movie reviews.

TV:

The Real Housewives of blah blah blah: Am I still a feminist if I dig this show? Why do I love it so much? Plus, it is kinda bad if I actually have preferences (i.e. the ladies of Miami just do not have the depth of NYC). And how awesome is that both NYC and Orange County are on right now?

Say Yes to the Dress: I got hooked on this show after going wedding gown shopping with one of my dear friends. Since I ordered my wedding dress online and got married barefoot on a public beach in Maui, the whole wedding dress shopping thing was new to me. Though I was slightly traumatized after the shopping trip (it lasted longer than my race time at Big Kahuna in 2008), I strangely became fascinated by the wedding dress experience. Say Yes to the Dress is educational (now I know what pick-ups are!) and amazing that people will spend like, $10k for a dress. Again, I ask myself, "Am I still a feminist if I dig this show?"

The Office: Will Ferrel's first episode was pretty funny. Is it bad that I am not super sad that Steve Carrel is leaving The Office? His character was kind of over three seasons again. Yeah, I can be kind of harsh. I just feel like there are so many more interesting characters (see: Kelly, Creed, Erin) on the show and Michael Scott kind of bogarts the screen time.

Shedding for the Wedding: (sidenote: what is up with the wedding theme here?) I haven't religiously watched biggest loser, but for some reason the show piqued my interest (perhaps because it followed ANTM). I can't even explain why I like this show. It was just, enjoyable. and there is something super cool about people who never thought they could be strong and active getting hooked on it and finding confidence in themselves.

MOVIES

The Romantics: I foolishly paid money for this junk on pay per view. I should have known better seeing as it had Katie Holmes in it. This film was about a group of college friends who reunite for a wedding. It was only and hour and 37 minutes long (short compared to today's epic films), but it felt lazy and tedious. The character development consisted of rehearsal dinner speeches and conversations about things that happened in the past. Um, yeah, I already saw Rachel Getting Married.

The Joneses: this is --I think--supposed to be a satirical movie. It stars Demi Moore and David Duchovny who play Mr. and Mrs. Jones. Their family moves into a Wisteria Lane-like neighborhood, and they are the perfect family. However, it turns out they are really part of a marketing plan to plant seeds in their neighbors' heads about which clothes/cars/frozen appetizers they should buy. I did manage to watch the whole movie, but I wanted it to be darker, edgier, less rom-com.

American Beauty/Ghost World: I loved these movies in my early twenties, but it was interesting seeing them now that I am closer in age to Kevin Spacey/Annette Bening/ Steve Buscemi's characters. These movies seem a little more depressing now. The first dinner scene in American Beauty where the family is so unhappy with each other was almost unwatchable. They are still great movies though.

Sex and the City 2: I was so sick and delirious I watched this stinker TWICE. And now, it's kind of growing on me. It's not Grease good, but maybe Grease 2 good.

That's all for today. Hopefully the next post will be healthier AND tri related.

Quieting my Mind? Not gonna happen...

2011-03-30T15:08:00.000-07:00

I wonder how many of my blog entries start with, "Ok, now I am back on track"? And the posts are all super gung ho and excited about triathlon training and then weeks or even months will go by without a peep from me because I inadvertently fell off the training wagon.

So, let's change it up and not even mention track and wagons and anything that will most likely set me up to eat a big old slice of humble pie.

Lets talk about other things. Like, yoga.

Ok, how come nobody told me how hard yoga is? How come my hips are so tight? How come it is so hard to quiet my mind? How come the cutest darn bag from Lululemon has to be $100? And when the heck am I going to start getting bendy? Sheesh.

Let's talk about Calendars. I am back on a calendar with my coach. It is kinda nice to have someone tell me what to do.

Let's talk about swimming. I have a feeling this could be the year I get faster at swimming. My ultimate goal is to break 40 minutes on a 1.2 mile swim. We shall see.

Let's talk about Spinervals. I kinda dig the dvds. Way more than spin class. Spin class is yucky.

Let's talk about LoseIt. I started using this website to log my food. Kinda cool. Kinda scary with the nutritional postings at restaurants now. 250 calories for a measly cookie from Subway? I could easily eat 10 of those. Seriously? And, what is up with the stupid "healthy" options? Yeah, lets have chocolate milk for kids. In theory that is good. But the size at Subway has 340 calories. That is crazy! That is a sandwich!

Let's talk about vacation exercise. I am going to Vegas for 3 days in May for a bachelorette party weekend. Is it weird that I mapped out swimming at the hotel pool Friday morning, followed by running the strip. And then Saturday forking over $40 bucks (!) so I can use a hotel gym for spinning and yoga class? Saying I am going to do that while in vegas and actually doing it are two very separate things.

Ok...I am done talking.

For now.

Go Green Half Marathon: A Race Report

2011-03-15T16:11:00.000-07:00

I initially signed up for this race earlier this year with the goal of it being a PR race. Which would mean beating my time from the Mermaid ½ Marathon in May of 2008. My first 5 weeks of training went well---I did every workout on the race plan I found in Women’s Running Magazine.

And then life happened.

I got sick. I had some late nights/weekends at work. Bravo started airing two rounds of Real Housewives (Andy Cohen, you are killing me!). I was finding running very challenging in that it felt like I was running through tar. My legs just couldn’t speed up.

I had a heart to heart with Coach Heidi and told her about my issues and how this race was not going to be a PR race, and I will treat it like a benchmark. She also said because of my past experiences (bike crash at Barb’s triathlon, knee dislocation baking cookies) she saw that I was losing confidence in my body. So she had a crazy idea. She wanted me to do yoga 2-3 times a week for a month.

Yoga? Me? Say what?!

I am not a yoga kind of girl. In college I probably would have gravitated towards it because I had a, “Oh the pretty flowers, meat is murder, everyone is beautiful” hippy dippy attitude, which has faded significantly over the years. But then, Heidi knows best. Plus yoga clothes are pretty cute.

I scanned the Club One schedule of classes to find a yoga class that worked with my schedule. I went to my first class Hatha Yoga a couple weeks ago. Holy cow! Can we say “challenging?” We did crazy poses, some people did headstands, and the instructor kept coming over to comment on how tight my hips were (hello! That is why I am here). It didn’t help that there was a Zumba class next door and I could hear Salt n’ Pepa’s “Push It” in the background.

The instructor told me to not be frustrated and you just have to keep doing it. I took a deep breath, thinking to myself, “Just gotta do this for one month.”

So, I have been sticking to the yoga for the past couple weeks. My goal is to have the natural sitting pose feel, well, natural. We shall see.

Now, on to the race report. Since I didn’t train for this race, I figured one thing I could do was work on my pre-race routine. This basically meant, don’t do any of the things I did at the Las Vegas ½ marathon. So, I hydrated, ate sensibly, got a good night’s sleep (except for accidentally setting my clock two hours ahead instead of one the night before a race that was on the first day of daylight savings). It actually worked out well to have more time in the morning because I got to drink some coffee, have some cereal and watch my DVRed Saturday Night Live (Zach Galifinakis was HILARIOUS!)

The race started at 8am at Vasona Park in Los Gatos. I met my friend Lisa, who was looking super cute in her green plain running skirt (it was, after all, a St. Patrick’s themed race). I even did a warm-up run and stretch routine prior to the race. I was ready.

The race itself was ok. It was nice to run a race on a trail I was familiar with. One thing I worked on was trying to shut my mind off. So often when I run my mind is thinking ahead, sorting through problems, planning my grocery list. I wanted to focus on the right now of this race. Are my shoulders relaxed? Is my core engaged? I even practiced a technique I learned in the previous day’s yoga class—if there is a part of you that is tight, take a deep breath and exhale through that body part. Ok, I know that makes no sense, but it kind of worked (and I am kind of afraid I am going back to my hippy dippy ways). I purposefully left my Garmin at home as I knew looking at my mileage pace would drive me crazy. I wore this Disney Princess watch my 6-year-old niece left in my car last summer and vowed to not look at the time until mile 12.

So, my final time was far from a PR (31 minutes to be exact), but it was still 11 minutes faster than the Vegas race in November. So that is pretty cool.

Namaste.

Sidelined...

2011-02-13T11:04:00.000-08:00

Training is an interesting thing. I forgot how, well, hard it can be. My last two long runs have been excruciating, going from 10 miles to 12 miles. Speed is hard to find. Last Saturday I did my 12 mile run on my favorite trail, and after mile 8 my legs just couldn't power through. I actually took some --gasp!--walk breaks!

I rarely take walk breaks. I think they leave a bitter taste in my mouth because of my first marathon training program 9 years ago. I was a relative newbie at that time, and was in the 15 minute mile group. Our program was a run/walk program and we would run 2 minutes, walk 3 minutes. The plan was to do this for the entire marathon. So, every Sunday for 6 months our group met in Shoreline Park for long runs. One member of the group would set his watch for the walk breaks, and eventually we had Pavlovian responses any time we heard a beep (run? walk? drink water?). When it came to the actual marathon, I did the run walk for the first 18 miles. But honestly, it did not feel good so I ran the last 8 miles with minimal walk breaks. I think the constant starting and stopping was very jarring on my body and the experience was not enjoyable, save for the facts that I was in Hawaii and I completed a marathon. So, after that race I secretly vowed to myself to never take a walk break again. Or do a marathon again. of course, I broke both vows.

Anyways, with last Saturday's run I was extremely puzzled as to why the long runs are hard. I mean, I did 3 --albeit far from PRs---half marathons in 2010 with little or no training. I have enough confidence in my body's abilities to know that if I roll out of bed most likely I could run 13 miles.

But, why is it so hard now?

Then my friend Diane reminded me that training is supposed to be hard. I have diligently followed a training plan for 6 weeks where I have run 4 times a week, so my body isn't the super freshest when it comes to the long runs. The point of training isn't to have a great long training run. It is to push your body so you can have a great race run.

Plus, I have learned the hard way that preparation is key. I am kind of not the smartest when it comes to training. The Tuesday before my 12 mile run I was so preoccupied in ensuring I brought my garmin to my first mermaid track run of the season, that I forgot to bring socks. So, I foolishly ran without socks and got a blister the size of a tennis ball on my foot. And I foolishly forgot to put glide on my feet before the 12 mile run, which made the blister angry like the Hulk. And I foolishly ate half a psycho donut the night before the run. And I foolishly went to bed at 12:30 the night before the run. And I foolishly forgot Gu for the run.

Yeah, I am not that smart.

But, it helped me learn the things I shouldn't do before a race. So, mentally I was preparing myself for the training 10k race that would be the Saturday after the 12 mile run. The race that I foolishly thought was still open for registration online. But it wasn't so I figured I would chance it and do race day registration.

Unfortunately, the Monday before the race i woke up with a throat that felt like it was being stabbed with an ice pick.

Awesome. I caught my hubby's cold.

So instead of prepping for the 10k last week, I was sidelined to the couch coughing and sneezing and trying to not be down on myself for not training I was . Yesterday was the 10k, and I knew it wouldn't help my recovery if I raced.

The funny thing is, when you hit a bump in the road after you find your groove, it always seems so daunting to get back on track. But I am determined to accept the reality that, yes I lost a week of training, but I still have 4 weeks of good solid training to go before the half marathon.

I think I should be back to normal by tomorrow, so...
Let's do this thing.

writer's (and runner's) block...

2011-02-01T14:12:00.000-08:00

I think I have tried 10 times to start a post but keep getting stuck. Perhaps it is a metaphor for my training right now. I am six weeks into my half marathon training program and I think Sunday's 10 mile run ranked in the top 5 of worst.runs.EVER. I did not find my groove. I even added some fun new songs to my long run playlist (Ke$ha following Tchaikovsky with a little Bye Bye Birdie for good measure? Genius!). But alas, my legs were just not moving the way they usually do. I felt like I was running through tar. Then the rain came. I wanted to just turn around, call it a day and be happy with 6 miles. However, that kind of mentality defeats the purpose of training.

So, I finished the run begrudgingly. No post-run, king of the world euphoria. I decided to make the most out of a yucky run and do all the things you are supposed to do to recover after long runs. I drank chocolate milk. I ice bathed. I foam rollered. I adviled. But the lackluster run was weighing on my shoulders, so I decided to e-mail my tri-coach (our training group starts the season today. Yea!):

Hi coach,
Are you ready for the neurosis to begin?

So I am halfway through my half marathon training program. I had a really really yucky long run yesterday. It was a 10 miler and I felt like I was running through tar. I couldn't get under a 12 minute mile.

A couple things:

My last long run since yesterday was 2 weeks prior (last week was 5k race pace).

Last week was a busy work week and my workouts weren't as diligent (did a light spin monday, 4Xhill repeats Tuesday, easy 3 mile run on Wednesday, nothing Thursday and Friday, slow as molasses 3 miler on Saturday, long run Sunday)

I ran on the sidewalk yesterday (too lazy to drive to a trail)

I even took an ice bath and foam rollered after the run and slept in compression socks

I fell off the wagon nutrition wise last week,

So, I will go back to logging on Loseit and will email it to you. But any advice or thoughts on what a bad long run means?

to which she wrote back:

Bummer for your run....you might not like what I'm going to say.

Training is HARD, it's supposed to kinda suck sometimes. If you didn't have that crappy run, you wouldn't be ready for whatever gets thrown at you race day. If every training run ran like buttah...how would you be prepared to battle all of the things you can't control on race day.

AT LEAST, you can look back and see some things you can change for the future right?? Nutrition, so elemental right?? You have to eat enough and eat right or you are fighting a losing battle.

Buck up buckaroo....rest today and let's make it happen tomorrow night. Let that run go and know you are a better runner because of it. Make the changes you need to, get the runs in and try not to think about it too much.

So...I am letting that run go. And as I posted on FB last week, to (sorta) quote Big Lebowski: "Sometimes you eat the long run. Sometimes the long run eats you."

First Post of 2011...

2011-01-09T20:50:00.000-08:00

So, a couple of big things...I am doing masters swim program (on a, ahem, regular basis) through club one and I am on week 4 of a half marathon training program...i haven't really trained for a half marathon in a couple years (I mean, I have done some half marathons since then, just didn't train). So, yeah...will be interesting to see how 2011 comes together...what with (actually) training and stuff...

half marathon: what not to do

2010-12-08T20:12:00.000-08:00

1. Do not sign up for a half marathon in vegas and expect a PR
2. Do not fly down to orange county the Thursday before, do disneyland the friday before and fly out to vegas that night
3. do not got to bed at 4am the day before the race
4. do not wear a new running skirt for the first time (hellooo chafing!)
5. do not grab the first pair of running shoes you see in your closet while packing---that was 2008's model silly!
6. Do not eat nachos, buffalo wings, sushi, lycheetinis, and cabo wabo margaritas the day before
7. do not expect your tummy to not rebel on race day because of #6
8. do not walk 4 miles around disneyland two days before, and 5 miles round trip to packet pickup the day before
9. do not forget to have breakfast on race morning
and finally
10. do not get hooked on the "deal or no deal" slot

and finally
11. do not forget to have an awesome weekend doing crazy things with friends and feeling kinda proud that you can manage to (slowly) finish 13.1 miles with no training AND vegas/disney antics.

Looking to the Future...

2010-11-15T12:48:00.000-08:00

My last post was a recap of STP. Yikes. That was in JULY. Sheesh.

My lack of posts is due to a lackluster year. Biking 200 miles in one day has been my only claim to fame for 2010. The events I did after the ride were nothing to (literally) write home about. I dealt with some annoying bouts of plantar fasciatis (aggravated by running 4 miles at the Sandman tri in August) and had a cold in October that had me on the couch instead of training for two weeks. I also took an Improv class through comedysportz for 8 weeks in September and October, so I didnt focus on race training as much as I could have. I did a half marathon in Morgan Hill last week, which was about 17 minutes faster than the Kaiser 1/2 in February, but still a pathetic race time in comparison to Mermaid race in 2008.

So now is the time to now is the time to reflect on the past and look to the future. I am gonna just say it: I did not train in 2010, and hence I had a not-so-stellar race year. Even with Seattle to Portland I only got serious about training 1 1/2 months before the race, which in reality I needed another 1 1/2 months of training. But I did finish it and I did finish a 1/2 marathon last week without having a training run longer than 8 miles since February. That is saying something, though not quite sure what is is saying.

What does the future show? Thanksgiving I will do what I always do: the Turkey Trot in San Jose. Though this year I decided to sign up for the 5k and make it a fast training run for the Vegas half marathon on December 5.

Yup, Vegas. I am gonna something CRAZY. I am flying to Orange County Dec 2, playing in Disneyland for a few hours with mermaid friends Dec. 3, driving to LA that afternoon to pick up a good friend, and the two of us will fly out to vegas together. I will race that Sunday in the rock n roll 1/2. Though honestly, I have no dreams of a PR because, well, it is Vegas. My one goal is to not hit the snooze button when the alarm goes off on race day.

Here is my plan for 2011 races:

Jan 1 Resolution Run 5 miler, Los Gatos
Feb 12: Mermaid 1/2 Marathon, San Diego
April 16: Tierra Bella Bike Ride (distance TBD, depending on dedication to get on bike)
April 17: Reservoir Triathlon, Morgan Hill (though if I do the 100 mile or 120 mile ride at Tierra Bella, most likely will not do this one
April 23 Mermaid 1/2 Marathon
June: Mermaid tri? possible long course silicon valley tri?
August 13: Santa Cruz Olympic Tri
September ?: Mermaid Santa Cruz?
Thanksgiving: Turkey Trot

Now, one thing I do know is I want to do a long course triathlon and a marathon. (hmmmm...deja vu, since that was my goal for 2010 AND 2009)
There are a couple factors in place. If I get my name pulled for NY Marathon lottery (race is in November) I will do Silicon Valley long course (it is in June, and for some reason 4 miles short of a 1/2 iron distance on the run). If I don't get into NY, I will do Big Kahuna in September and California Marathon in December.

I also plan on doing Splash and Dashes as training workouts, and may toss in some centuries for good measure.

So 2011, I say to you, "bring it..."

STP: A Slacker Cyclist's Recap

2010-07-20T16:25:00.000-07:00

STP is over! And I finished it. IN ONE DAYYYYYYYY.

Here is my recap which is probably riddled with typos as I am still a little delirious from the craziness.

I spent the night at my friends house in Sacramento on Wednesday. We left Sacramento at 8am on Thursday. I realized there would be a lot of cat herding with this group, but whatever. There were four of us doing the ride so we took two cars for all the bikes. The car ride was brutal (very traffic-y in Portland and Seattle) and we didn't get to the hotel until 10:15 that night. Fortunately, I brought my walkie talkies so we could communicate with each other during the ride. We went to a restaurant/bar for food because it was the only place in walking distance of our Seattle hotel that was open. They had happy hour so all the apps were 1/2 off. I don't what we were thinking, but we ordered tons of cheesy fatty delicious apps and had a couple beers. Hello? Wasn't Seattle to Portland in two days? I think we were in denial. We got back to our hotel room at 12:30 am (!) and went to sleep at 1:30. Who did I think I was? A 20-something-year-old? Sheesh.

We rolled out of bed around 8 and stumbled to the lackluster continental breakfast buffet at the hotel and drank some weak coffee flavored water. We then went across the street to Starbucks to recharge. We got back to the hotel room and started the packing for the ride. That was when the reality of what we were going to do set in as we giggled nervously putting our energy gels in bento boxes and packed our overnight bag that we would drop off at the start.

We then headed to downtown Seattle to do at least one touristy thing and went on the Underground Tour (it was cool, though I would have preferred stopping in some of the cute stores. And THAT is why I am a diva.) We were back to our hotel area in time for an early pasta dinner and were in bed by 8:30. Our alarms went off at 3(!) and we shoved some breakfast in our mouths, drank coffee,packed up our gear and bikes, and drove to the start at University of Washington. What is amazing is it didn't feel like a 10,000 person event, but perhaps that is because the one day people had an earlier start and left in waves. They estimate only 2500 of the participants do the one day event. We rolled out at 5 am and it wasn't as chaotic as I anticipated. The first 15 miles were beautiful. We rode around the bay as the sun was rising and I though to myself, "this would be a great place to live." Then we were on a less scenic more commercial part, which was fine. Before I knew it, we were at the first rest stop. I decided to not stop because it looked crowded and my pace felt great. I ate a gu (Vanilla-YUCK!) and drank some gatorade. At one point we hit a stoplight at a major intersection and I looked behind me and saw hundreds of cyclists. I felt like I was having lunch at the cool kids table. It was super cool.

I stopped at the second rest stop for a potty break. I spotted a man wearing La Dolce Velo bike shorts and I said, "Are you from California? I am too! I go to Dolce Velo sometimes. I am friends with Rob and Jaquie on Facebook! They are cool!" (um, did I mention I had a big coffee at the 24 hour starbucks on the way to University of Washington?) I hopped on my bike and checked the time. I had ridden straight for 41 miles in 2 hours 45 minutes. Not too shabby.

The next 30 miles were a blur. I was very amused by all the signs for small business in these itty bitty towns. One business had a sign advertising tanning AND saw sharpening. Some of the cars were aggro, but that is typical for big rides like this. On one busy road traffic was coming to a stop and I saw two fire trucks in the middle of the road. I rode slowly past and saw a girl on a gurney on the ground and two fire fighters surrounding her and talking to her. It was a very solemn moment and it made me realize I need to be extra careful on the ride. At around mile 83 we went on a bike path. Phew, right? That would be nice and safe. WRONG. My theory is people turned their brains off when they got on the path because they didn't have to deal with cars. I witnessed two separate instances where bikes crashed into each other and passed two people on there backs who must have crashed. YIKES. There was a rest stop at the end of the path with REAL BATHROOMS and snickerdoodle cookies. It was like Christmas. I felt bad for a guy who was walking on the grass and yelled, "Ew! Dog poop in my cleats!" But it was kind of funny. Oh, also on the path I accidentally knocked off my headlamp and rolled over it. As I heard the crunching noise I thought naively, "Well, I will be done before dark, right?" BWA HA HA.

Finally I made it to halfway point. 100 miles in a little under 7 hours of riding! Whoo hoo. I had a sandwich and drank some chocolate milk and hopped back on my bike. Oops...my stomach lurched a little. To quote Anchorman: "Milk was a bad choice." The next 30 miles were gorgeous as we were surrounded by trees and creeks. The Pacific Northwest is so gorgeous. I stopped at another rest stop and chatted with some fellow riders (I didn't ride with my friends as we are all different speeds). They asked me how far I was going (some people stop at mile 100, some at mile 150) and I said allegedly all the way. They seemed concerned that I was by myself, but I said, "I'm fine. It's alllll good." They were stopping at mile 150.

Around mile 140ish I started getting nervous because I knew THE BRIDGE was coming. Finally I saw the signs for Lewis and Clark Bridge and took a deep breath to brace myself. This is a major bridge with lots of traffic that connects Washington to Oregon. There isn't a separate area for cyclists, just a bike lane where if you made one wrong move into the lane next to you, you would be toast because of the cars going so fast. Oh yeah, did I mention it was uphill? It was a mile long and awful. I didn't think it could get any worse until I reached the top and realized I had to go downhill. EEEEK! I finally made it across the bridge and stopped at a gas station to get some food, water, and 7up for my nervous tummy. By this time it was 6:30ish and I had 50 miles left. I called Dennis to check in and told him about the headlamp breaking. I could tell that freaked him out a little even though he sounded calm on the phone. I got back on my bike and braced myself for the next 50 miles.

The next 40 miles were on an awful, busy highway. I started to fall apart. It hurt sitting on my bike seat. My feet were numb. There were rolling hills and cars swooping past me. As the sun started setting I had a feeling that I didn't think I could finish the ride. At this point I was pretty much all alone on the road, except for a few times when two or three cyclists would pass me. I just wanted to be home with my cuddly kitty and my hubby. At around 8:45 I passed a woman and asked her if she wanted to ride with me. She gratefully said yes and I told her she should ride in front because she had a front light and I had a back light. Two other riders joined our little wolf pack and we rode into the night. It got pitch black out there and I was on the verge of a panic attack. But we made it to Portland, went over another bridge (luckily it was a pedestrian/bike only bridge and it was amazing to ride over the water at night). We went through a hip section of downtown and drunk people cheered us on. Finally the finish line was there! They were supposed to close the finish line at 9, but some volunteers stayed around to give us our patches. It was 11pm! Holy Mole. I stumbled to my hotel in a daze. My friend LaRee got in around 8:00pm so she was already at the hotel Our friend Nancy had to get a hotel room at mile 140 because she got four flats on her ride and didn't want to risk getting a flat in the dark. Jason was already asleep on the rollaway bed in our hotel . He called a cab at mile 170 to get him. I took an ice bath, tried to eat some food, but just didn't have the energy to to chew. Laree and I watched bad tv and discussed our adventures. We woke up the next morning, had breakfast, and headed to the finish line to cheer Nancy on. She called us when she was a couple miles away from the finish because she got another flat and ran out of CO2. Fortunately someone gave her a cartridge and she was at the finish in no time flat. We were together again!
So, we hopped on a shuttle back back to Seattle that took us 5 1/2 hours, ate at the Indian Restaurant at our hotel, woke up by 5 and hit the road to go back home. I got back at 11pm last night. Fatigue is starting to hit now.

All in all, I am glad I did it. I am glad I finished something that I couldn't even picture completing. Would I do it again? Maybe. But only if I flew and took more time to explore Portland or Seattle.

Are you trying to sabotage me?

2010-06-03T16:41:00.001-07:00

Though I didn't write a lot about Wildflower in my previous post, I did want to admit to one thing that happened after I found out I was disqualified:

I cried.

Seriously, how dumb is that? It is just a race for peets sake. But once they stripped me of my timing chip and my coach hugged me in sympathy, I felt the tears prick my eyes and turned into this big baby. I wasn't sad. I was just tired and sunburnt and speechless and all I was capable of was crying.

Now that I am 5 weeks away from Seattle to Portland and my bike rides have intensified, I am finding that I just feel...like an animal. Or rather, more primal.

Ok, that sounds weird. Let me explain.

In our everyday lives, we try to be rationale human beings and keep our emotions in check. We try to be polite, we don't yell at someone meandering in the hot foods section of Whole Foods even though deep down that is what we are dying to do. We control ourselves, and don't show the world our emotions.

However, once you start training for endurance sports, it gets a wee bit harder to keep yourself in check. (please note: I wrote "once you start', this doesn't apply to the hardcore people who can sleep for three hours and then wake up and say, "Oh, guess I will ride 200 miles today" and totally be ok. I am not sure what it is like for those guys. Maybe one day I will be that cool).

When I trained for my first marathon, I became super duper emotional and irrational. The training for hours and hours was getting to me. I remember it was my turn to bring cookies to the group workout and I went off on my boyfriend (now husband) for eating some of them. To be fair, he ate like A DOZEN cookies. IN ONE DAY.

I woke up the morning of the workout to see a suspicious amount of cookies missing. Then the yelling started.
"Did you eat my cookies? I MADE THOSE FOR MY WORKOUT GROUP! YOU KNOW WE ARE RUNNING, LIKE,TWENTY TWO MILES TODAY! HOW COULD YOU DO THIS? ARE YOU TRYING TO SABATOGE ME? GARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR."

And he STILL wanted to marry me even after this outburst. Guess the lesson is, show someone your Incredible Hulk Side and if they stick around, they are a winner. Or you are a winner.

On my long bike rides I am aware of every emotion, every drop of sweat, and every pain. After 80 miles, I want to cry and hurl my bike off a cliff. My teeth feel furry from all the gatorade and gu I am injesting. I find myself grunting and making arm gestures because it is too difficult to talk to my riding partner. I am on a stupid bike and I would rather be at home watching The Real Housewives of Whatever.

But it isn't all bad. After riding 100(!) miles on Saturday, we stopped at Togos for non-sports nutrition grub. My otherwise mediocre turkey sandwich was an amazing delicacy and the sea salt and vinegar potato chips were life-altering. Don't even get me started on the oreo shake after the bike ride..sigh...

Anyways, there isn't a huge lesson here or theme to this random post...just that pushing your body for more than 3 hours is hard, but food tastes delicious.

Don't Put All Your Eggs in One Bento Box

2010-05-24T14:32:00.000-07:00

Since I guilt-tripped my friend M to update her blog, guess I need to update mine so I don't look like a hypocrite. Last blog was after the Cinderella ride, which was almost 6 weeks ago. A lot has happened since then: 4 races and 2 organized rides. I had another flippin' DNF for a half ironman. Here is the shortened version of what happened at wildlfower. I am quoting a conversation I had last week when some friends went over to my parents house. We were getting ready for the iCare classic bike ride and enjoying dinner.

Nancy: "So Jill, what happened at wildflower? I heard it didn't go so well."
Me: "Yeah, I had a slow bike so-"
The table immediately erupted in giggles and I was confused until I realized how I sounded. I played along.
Me: "Yeah, I just don't know why my bike isn't faster. I should take it to the shop and say, 'this bike isn't going as fast as I want. Fix it.'"

In actuality, it was me who was slow on the bike, not the bike itself. (Don't hate the game? Hate the player?) I learned my lesson that not training enough for a 1/2 ironman triathlon will result in a not so great race. I also learned that you should PAY ATTENTION TO CUT OFF TIMES. As in STUDY THE RACE PROGRAM. For some reason I thought the bike cut off was 3. Which meant as long as I got off my bike and in the transition by 2:59 pm, I would be golden to run the 13 miles.

Yeah, the cutoff was actually 2:45. But they apparently gave people a 10 minute grace period so it was really 2:55.

I rolled in at 2:57.

I foolishly was thinking, "Oh yeah, I got this. Wait, why is this race official taking my timing chip off? What the -"

So, I was disqualified, but she did say I could run the 13 miles if I wanted to. It just wouldn't count.

Oh, that sounds super.

Yeah, I passed and chose to enjoy an adult beverage at the spectator stands while cheering my friends on who finished.

So, whatever. I had another bust of a high profile race. It's not like this is my job. If the Barb's Crash of 2008 taught me anything, it's don't put all your eggs in one bento box. Life goes on. I could recap the Wildflower Experience, but am not really feeling it. In summary, it was a big ole' pain in the neck party with 10,000 people taking over a campground. It was cold. It was hot. It was sweaty. It was no toilet paper for one day. It was sleeping on the ground on a slanted hill. It was sunburnt. It was crazy endurance athletes. It was a man with cerebral palsy doing the swim. It was people crossing a finish line with their own story as to how they got there. It was a hard race. It was awesome.

I will try again next year.

We're on a Road to Nowehere

2010-04-12T13:57:00.000-07:00

Below is an excerpt from an e-mail exchange between me and my coach:

To: coach@getoffthecouch.com
from: Jill@slacker.com

Hi Coach, Thanks for the workout yesterday and the wildflower peptalk/scared straight talk. :) So, I am going back and forth on Cinderella. To challenge or not to challenge? At first I wasn't going to do the challenge, but now I may do it. But then I read blogs about Patterson Pass being super crazy and now I just don't know. so, 65 miles or 95 miles with crazy hills. What do you think? -Jill

To: jill@slacker.com
From: Coach@getoffthecouch.com
Do the challenge. Pretend you are at the gnarly wildflower hill and practice what you will say to yourself
-coach

(um...I kinda know what I will say to myself...and they are not fit to post in a family friendly blog)

So, yeah, I did the Cinderella Challenge. 87 miles on the bike with wind and nasty climbs. Honestly, not to sound like a jerk, but this is my third year doing this and I just wanna lecture the newbies who do not know the rules of the road. If you are slowing use a the correct gesture or announce it BECAUSE I CAN'T READ YOUR MIND. There is a bike lane there for a reason, so please use it. And seriously, do NOT PASS ON THE RIGHT! ARRRRGGG.

Maybe I get upset because I see shades of my former self in them.i.e. Riding a bike without knowing the consequences of my actions. When I think of how I rode my bike on the road in college...um, I can't believe I am still here. No lights. No helmets. Riding home from the pizza place I worked at 1 in the morning!

Anyhoo, by doing the challenge (which breaks off from the main group at mile 26ish) I got to enjoy a fairly empty ride with people who were schooled in the art of cycling. It was spooky coming into the school where the lunch rest stop was because it was empty. When I did this ride in previous years, it was always super duper crowded at the rest stops. But, I was behind by an hour and half and missed the crowds.

We rode up Patterson Pass. Hill. Big hill. But, I didn't walk. We took group photos at the top and were surrounded by the maniacal flapping noises of windmills. Downhill was scary as I cuddled my brakes desperately hoping I would maintain control of my bike.

Going back into Livermoore on the Altamant pass was hell. We hit wind and took an hour to go SIX MILES. At one point I was all by myself on an empty road and was literally singing the talking heads song, " we're on a road to nowhere...."

So, that is all I want to say about this ride. I feel that I am gradually getting stronger, but just am not getting where I want to be. It will happen. Eventually.

The plan now? Get some open water swim time in and brick workouts with major hills on the run to prep for wildflower which is in, oh, LESS THAN THREE WEEKS.

sigh.

Thoughts while on a bike...

2010-04-01T15:42:00.000-07:00

1) Dead flat squirrels are kinda gross.
2) 5 miles down, only 50 to go. Seriously?
3) Maybe that pre-ride mcmuffin was a poor choice.
4) I have to run 13 miles after this?
5) I think I have ridden 300 miles this month. Cool.
6) Was that a bug I just swallowed?
7) Santa Barbara would be a fun weekend getaway. Do I go in August or September. I should get some new dressed for that trip. That sounds so nice. Wine tasting. Relaxing on the beach....much better than being on a bike for 5 hours.
8) 20 miles down. 35 to go. Seriously?
9) I have seen some pretty cool parts of California on two wheels.
10) Maybe nasty grade isn't so nasty.
11) oooh...it is pretty nasty.
12) Relax.Relax.Relax. ACK TRUCK HAULING A TRAILER PASSING ME ON THIS HUGE HILLLLLLLL! Relax. Relax.
13) Did I seriously sign up for a two hundred mile bike ride in July?
14) Is it raining or was that just sweat pouring our of my helmet? Gross. Triathlons are gross.
15) Should I book a massage for Sunday or Monday?
16) Did I misss my turn. Its been 56 miles. Shouldn't I be there by now? Where is everybody? Where am i? I.Don't. Want. To. Be . On. This. Bike. Any. More. I will call a cab. I totally will. This ride can kiss my----oh, hey, that's where I turn. Sweet.
17) This hill is going to suuuuuuuck when it is crowded with triathletes.
18) Why don't I look like THAT in spandex shorts. I hate her. That's mean. I don't hate her. It's spandex I hate.
19) Seriously? 13 miles? After THIS?
20) What shall I have for dinner? What will be, like, the perfect food? Grilled cheese sounds amazing. Like, good grilled cheese, american cheese on sturdy bread and a chocolate shake..ohmygoshthatsoundssogoodandIwantitrightnowandIamsosickofsportsdrinksthattastelikepunchata6yearoldspartiesandsportsbarsthatlookliketheyarealreadydigestedandwhywouldtheycallsomethinggu.gross.

Short recap

2010-02-18T10:14:00.000-08:00

It has been awhile since I have blogged. Here is a short update of races.

Kaiser 1/2 marathon: slow, hard, nice weather, beautiful route.
Mermaid 10k: 1 week after Kaiser half. Legs are still feeling like I am running through mud.

I haven't had a good quality run since the Campbell Oktoberfest 5k last October. I am doing more tempo work, so hopefully that will get me to my ideal race pace.

I have found my 1/2 iron training plan. Next step is following the training plan. I also am trying to tweak the plan by combining it with my Seattle to Portland bike ride. My crazy friend who was the one who convinced me to do Alcatraz two years ago said we should try training for doing the ride in one day. 200 miles. One day. I said, "Ok." When will I learn.

As an added incentive, I told myself the first time I ride 100 miles, I will treat myself to a new Coach bag.

Will write more next week...

There is no SLOW group

2010-01-26T14:26:00.000-08:00

I hopped back on the workout train finally. A week ago Saturday I had my first meeting with the Cinderella Challenge Training Group. This is a group that has a training ride each Saturday in preparation for the all-women Cinderella Ride in April. I am planning on doing the Challenge (same route as regular ride, with an extra 20 miles of hills thrown in), because I just really really REALLY want to be a rock star on the bike. And I am so not there right now.

I showed up to the first meeting totally unprepared--I just figured it would be a "Hey, this is what to expect, lets ride the bikes a bit, Cumbaya, blah, blah, blah." Wrong! They informed us we were doing a 21 mile ride. Wha? So, I took off with the first group and we rode around Fremont and had a little hill in there. I am not a great group cyclist, and the leaders kept giving me tips. I have space issues, and group cycling is all about riding close together.

The following day I did an hour and fifty minute run at the Los Gatos Creek Trail. It was the only dry time that day, so I lucked out. My prep for the Kaiser 1/2 (which is in 2 weeks--HELLO!) hasn't been the greatest. I had originally planned on doing Hal Higdon't training plan, but the rain and cold made running outside not very appealing. Instead, I had my trainer set up and did 3 bike workouts during the week and one 2 mile run squeezed in there.

My second training ride on Saturday went well. The leaders decided to split us up in groups based on speed. I asked some of the ladies which one was the slow group anda couple were a little indignant, "There is no SLOW group. There is Fast and FAST FAST."

Fine, fine, whatever, just put me in the non-time trial style group. The ride was 32 miles, some climbing, and a bit wet. I felt pretty strong though. Or rather, on my way to getting strong. Did I mention that I really, really, REALLY want to be a rock star on the bike?

On Sunday my plan was to run 2 hours. Also on the agenda was breakfast with the hubby and going to Trader Joes. My problem with Sunday runs is I usually get a late start on them and by the time I get home, it is time to make dinner and poof the weekend is over. So, my plan was to kill two birds and run to Santana Row where I could meet Hubby for brunch. I tried to figure out a route, and the decided I would just run to Santana Row and then run around the neighborhood there it to make up for whatever time was left.

Unfortunately, I managed to get a little lost. I took one road, and knew I had to make a left on Pruneridge, but somehow got my streets mixed up. Gradually I found my way to The Row, and it took exactly two hours. I was done by 12:15, had a lovely brunch at Left Bank (why hello, $5 Mimosas), and looked at couches with the hubby at Design within Reach and Crate and Barrel.

We went to Trader Joes, Chain Reaction Bike Shop, checked out and open house in our complex, and even managed some Super Mario Brothers on the Wii. All in all, a great, productive weekend.

This week's goal is to make it to one spin class. Oh, and bike early Saturday morning since I can't make it to the group ride. And get some speed work done on the track. That's it.

Note to self...

2010-01-12T21:16:00.000-08:00

um...yeah...remember that 1/2 marathon you signed up for in February? You may want to like seriously start training for that...like, try running for more than 45 minutes...just a thought...

2010---off to a good start and not (too) slackery.

2010-01-03T12:01:00.000-08:00

Because I am all about cliche New Years resolutions, I am in full force so far in 2010. I have ran 2 - yes 2!- races this year AND did a spin class this morning. This year is going to be THE year for greatness. The two races were also a good barometer of my fitness level going into the new year.

On New Year's morning I met up with a bunch of friends to do the Los Gatos Resolution run. It is a 5 mile run to Lexington Reservoir. I have done the route a few times and was prepared for the hills. The run was ok. I wasn't fast and wasn't super slow. They only had enough goody bags for the first 300 finishers, and I didn't make it in time for a bag. Not that I was all bent out of shape---it just was a little humbling to know that I wasn't fast enough for a goody bag.

Yesterday I did the Brazen New Year's Run at Lake Chabot. I had heard about the race a few weeks ago and was THIS close to signing up for the 1/2 marathon. I slacked off though and didn't register until a few days ago and knew that a 10k would be far enough.

That race was the hardest one I have done since the Pacifica Trail Run 2 years ago. It was ridiculously hilly, muddy, and profanity-inducing. I did it in a pathetic hour and 31 minutes. Slowest 10k ever.

This morning I joined my friend Diane for a Spinning class. Yikes--60 minutes of sweat and torture. I must have been delusional or was high from exercise-induced endorphins because I signed up with 24 hour fitness again.

This week will be getting on my 1/2 marathon trainig plan and starting my swim class. I just have to be dedicated to making working out a habit.

2009: A Year of Racing that Wasn't...

2009-12-14T15:27:00.000-08:00

As the holidays are upon us and the New Year approaches, people start making there resolutions. If you are a triathlete, most likely you will be making race-olutions. What is a race-olution? For me, it is a time when I reflect on the past year, and start thinking about my goals and races for the following year. It is a time to envision PRs, crazy scary distances, and perhaps getting better at a certain sport(s).

2009 for me can best be summed up as a year of good intentions but bad circumstances. I also had a slight hangover this year from the intensity of 2008 in which I participated in 17 races. Of those races, 3 were half-marathons, 7 were triathlons, and one was swimming Alcatraz. The big events of 2008 were crashing my bike at Barb's, but eventually finishing my first 1/2 ironman at Big Kahuna.

I went into 2009 with a semi-realistic goal of improving my 1/2 iron time by attacking Barb's again. I was going to be an awesome cyclist. I was going to crush my half marathon times and finally break a 2 hour race. I was going to be a lean, mean, racing machine.

Unfortunately, 2009 turned out to be quite sucktacular in terms of races and enhancing my athletic prowess. I tweaked my back in early February, putting a damper on my training for the Mermaid 1/2 in March. The Mermaid half was a brutal race this year what with the rain and wind, and I had my slowest half ever. I squeezed in a couple 5ks in, and did the Cinderella ride again. Towards the end of April, I really started to amp up my training for Barb's in August. Unfortunately, I attempted to bake that fateful batch of cookies in May and dislocated my knee and spent my summer in physical therapy and being grouchy on the couch.

arggg. Once I was given the green light to run again, it was very tough for me to get back into the groove. I did a couple races post knee injury, but they were all lackluster. My training was sporadic, and as a result my race experiences were bland.

The problem? My heart was not in it. I also took on a new job in November and my focus turned to my new responsibility and the idea of training was super overwhelming.

So, basically, my goals for 2010 are the same as 2009: Improve my half-ironman time; be a better cyclist; and be a lean mean racing machine. It is also a time to think strategically about my racing calendar. Here is a general idea, though nothing is set in stone because life can sometimes take you off track:

January
-Start January 1 with the Resolution Run in Los Gatos. A nice 5 mile hilly race that I will do with some mermaids. I am also thinking about doing another race in Castro Valley on January 2, as my nieces live up there and would be fun to get them involved.
-Swim class at De Anza.
-Spinning class.
-Work on increasing mileage for 1/2 Marathon in February.

February
-Kaiser half marathon (no goal time. It is on Super Bowl Sunday and is a great way to rationalize eating buffalo wings and Tostitos cheese dip while watching the game)
-Mermaid 10k in San Francisco (no goal time as well, since this will be a week after Kaiser half marathon)
-Mid February start to amp up cycling
-Join Team Mermaid and torture my core

March
-Continue bike, run, swim training
-St patricks 5k in Los Gatos. Goal: 5k in less than 30 minutes

April
-Cinderella bike ride: do the long route (80-90 miles)
-TRAIN TRAIN TRAIN for wildflower
-Mermaid run---do the 1/2 but as a training run, not a race.

May
-Wildflower 1/2 marathon. Goal time: 7 hours 30 minutes. Ideally 7 hours, but not sure what a realistic goal is.
-Remainder of May take it easy to recover

The summer I would like to concentrate on cycling. My friend and I are thinking about doing a 2 day bike ride that goes from Seattle to Portland, so I will definitely need to train for that.

August: recover from bike ride and start training for a marathon in October.

September: Mermaid Olympic Tri. Goal: PR for olympic distance.
train for marathon

October: Silicon Valley Marathon. I am really wanting to do a marathon again, and I like the idea of one that is small and not far away. Goal: beat my Eugene time. Ideally, race a 4:30. Yikes!

November: recover, recover, recover. Turkey trot.

December: reflect on 2010 and maybe take it easy with yoga.

OK, so this may be a little ambitious for 2010...but we will see. I am ready to be strong again. I am ready to say, "Take that 2009!"

Watch it kid!

2009-10-16T09:50:00.000-07:00

The good news? I have ran 4 days in a ROW this week. 4! Whoo hoo! Plus, I have biked 3 times since Saturday. Yesterday I even did a gradual brick workout. I biked an hour and a half and chilled at home for an hour and then ran 3 miles to my ww meeting (yeah...back on the ww...don't wanna talk about it. Knee injury over the summer brought on a severe case of the jeans-don't-fit-any-moresies). Plus, after ww meeting I ran .8 miles to meet hubby for takeout at Panda Express (not exactly gourmet, but surprisingly low point options there). That means I worked out for over 2 hours yesterday. Hooray!

The bad news? I didn't have the guts to attempt Mt. Eden on my bike ride. Not quite ready for climbs yet.

As I was riding yesterday, I started thinking of the mantras I repeat to myself to get through a challenging workout. I find that a lot of them relate to disney or storybook characters:

Open water: Finding Nemo: "Just keep swimming." (particularly when I feel all alone out in the ocean and start thinking about the "S" word.)

Climbing awful hills on my bike: The Little Engine That Could: "I think I can. I think I can." (though, I think to myself: "I know I can. I know I can." Once I have any doubt on a hill climb, that is when I usually topple over)

The beginning part of the run after bike transition with legs like jelly: The Toirtoise and the Hare: "Slow and steady wins the race." (more like, slow and steady at the beginning so I don't bonk at the end).

Also, my getting back out there made me realize another thing: kids are so flippin' annoying. They don't pay attention and are oblivious to the world around them. When I am on a trail, I truly believe that the dogs on the trail have more common sense than the kids. In the past year, there have been 3 incidents where I have been almost seriously injured from a kids actions. TWO happened in the last week. Here are the incidents:

1) While biking home last spring I was riding on Homestead Ave, and a few high school kids were walking on the sidewalk. There were two boys and a girl and they were acting all...teenagery. The boy, who was a real winner, was probably trying to flirt with the girl and he jokingly pushed her. off. the. sidewalk. into. MY. bikelane. I screamed as I swerved my bike to avoid her and nearly ran into an SUV. The kids just started laughing.

2) Last week I was riding on Prospect road and realized I missed my turn. It was fairly heavy traffic time and difficult to make a left turn. I pulled into a high school to turn around. I was in the right lane in the school lot to get back on to Prospect Rd. and as I was going straight I saw a kid in an SUV making a left into the school. He didn't quite understand that his monstrously large vehicle needed to stay to the left when he got on school grounds and he crossed over into the right lane basically face to face with me. I slowed down my bike thinking, "He has to see me. He has to see me...dear god he DOESN'T see me!" Finally he hit the breaks when he saw me. I put the brakes on my bike and managed to not fall off. I faced him in his SUV which was a foot away from me. He just drove off with a blank teenage boy expression while all the kids who were outside just started laughing (WHAT THE HECK with the laughing? Are you kids so flipping descensitized by Michael Bay movies that you don't recognize the seriousness of POSSIBLE REAL LIFE CARNAGE?) and said, "Nice driving man." A concerned mom in a corolla who was behind him the whole time rolled down her window and asked, "Are you ok honey?" "Yes," I mumbled while the adrenaline wore off.

3) This week I made the mistake AGAIN of working out while youths are walking home from school. so dumb. I was running on Homestead darting past elementary school kids (luckily none of them had those backpacks on wheels thingies). And one boy must have recognized his friend who was 20 feet ahead of me because he sprinted past me to catch up to this guy only to stop dead in his tracks right in my path. I was going pretty fast downhill and wasn't able to stop in time and I wound up bumping into this boy (luckily neither of us hit the asphalt). And this, dear reader, is where I realized that I am truly an adult because I turned around and said, "Watch it kid!" like a crotchety old lady scolding kids playing in her yard.

Moral of the story: don't try to be near schools when kids have just gotten out. They are all giddy with the excitement of no more school and aren't as intelligent as, say, a golden retriever.

It's funny that all that time training on the couch didn't prepare me for this.

2009-09-28T12:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I did my first triathlon (non-relay) of 2009. How did it go?
Slow. Painful. Fun.Ish.

I will preface this by saying my training for this race was less than minimal. I spent a good deal of my summer recovering from my knee injury, watching Bravo on the couch (yea Real Houswives and Top Chef), and occasionally jumping in the pool or running around the track. I was on my bike 4 times this summer. Four. With no hill training.

I still signed up for Mermaid Santa Cruz because, well, just because. It was quite nice to not be super neurotic and antsy for once. I decided to pick up my bib on race day. I showed up to the race an hour before my wave was going. Usually when I race, I make an effort to pick up my race number the day before and get all my gear in check. And I try to get to the transition super early for a good spot. This race, overall I was all about the, "Meh."

Hubby was with me, which was nice. Luckily this time when I got back from the bike he didn't ask me, "Where were you? That took a long time." Yeah, that happened at Cal Poly Tri 2008. He was on the otherside of the transition area and when I go off my bike and said that to me. It didn't go over too well. Remember that Far Side Cartoon, of what dogs hear and all dogs here is "blah blah b;ah Rusty blah blah"? Well, this is the Jill version.
What Hubby Says: "Where were you? That took a long time."
What Hubby means: "I was worred about you. I thought you injured yourself."
What Jill hears: "Blah Blah Blah you sure are slow blah blah."

Maybe I should write a Men are for Mars the Triathlete Edition.

Anyways, it was nice to have him there at the finsih. We stayed in Santa Cruz Sunday night and enjoyed the Boardwalk craziness (I love how that place never changes. It still looks how it did in the Lost Boys. And so do the people.) and happy hour at Aquarius. We ordered room service and were planning on getting The Hangover on Pay per view, but it was $15. Yikes,

So, here is a short summary of the race.

Swim: hard. long. crowded. There were women in that water that I don't think ever went in the ocean. I used to think people doing breastrstroke were annoying, but people were doing backstroke. I am sorry, but how can you SEE when you are on your back? It was aquatic bumper cars in there.

transition: after the swim, you have to climb 154 stairs to the transition area. Needless to say, I took my time. No more injuries, please.

Bike: First time ever during a race that I walked my bike up a hill. I had a feeling I wasn't going to make it up the monster hill in the beginning. I was in the wrong gear going up and panic starting hitting me. I had riders on my left and riders on my right and everyone was riding crooked up this beast. I had a feeling if I fell, it would be cyclist dominoes. I dug my heels toward the ground with each pedal stroke.but.it.was.not.happening. I was only half way up the hill and I knew what was going to happen. So, I shouted to the fellow riders:

"I'M GOING DOWN!"

I braced myself for the feeling of road meeting flesh, but miracle of miracles, I managed to unclip and get my foot on the ground and stop mermaid carnage from happening. Whoo hoo. From that moment on, I vowed to walk the hills. And that is totally ok. For this race.

Run: Slow. Difficult. Uphill.

So, there we have it. I am not calling what I did yesterday a race, it was more of a weekend away with Dennis with an early morning workout.

And that is totally ok. For this race.

And I ran (not so far away)

2009-08-05T09:36:00.000-07:00

yup---you read right. Last night I went to my first Mermaid workout in 2 1/2 months (some of the ladies were eyeballing me like, "who's the new girl?"---not in a judgy way though) and -to quote Forest Gump -"I.WAS.RUNN-ING!"

Yea! My feet and lungs were exhausted, but my soul was so happy to be back on familiar turf (AKA The Los Gatos Creek Trail). I ran nonstop for about 35 minutes and briefly thought "Maybe Big Kahuna in October." Though, the aquabike and not the 1/2 ironman may be more me speed.

Last night I had the HARDEST time fall asleep. I think that my body was all jazzed up from moving and I just couldn't relax. I kept looking at the alarm clock on my bed: 10:06. 10:45. 11:30. 12:05. 12:05? As in midnight? Ugh. it is so weird when you can sleep, because you literally spend two hours doing nothing productive.

Monday and today I rode my bike to work. It is a good route (about 18 miles round trip) and the only downfall is I have bad hair for the rest of the day. Oh well.

Monday "Dress-in"

2009-06-22T08:24:00.000-07:00

A month plus of no running, and no biking, and plenty of couch time with the Real Housewives of Jersey, means a couple of things: lack of post-race endorphins; bragging rights after a 4 hour bike ride, the warmth of camaraderie amongst training buddies.

It also means one other thing: tight clothes.

I am having some issues with my summer clothes that have zippers. Some zip up, but am dangerously close to muffin top, while others get stuck half way up my back.

Pretty depressing.

So, since I am not training for anything right now, maybe I should start training for a new thing: "Jill can't afford new clothes right now." So, it is really time to buckle down and get control of the food thing, especially since I am not burning as many calories pre-knee incident.

I have always struggled with the food thing. Weight Watchers was the most successful for me, but lately whenever I rejoin I just find those meetings brutal. I am more kumbaya when training with my workout buddies, not sitting around a circle listening to people drone on about apple slices and stuff. It is just a lot to deal with after work.

I think the reason weight watchers worked for me was it made me accountable for what I ate because I had to write things down and keep track of points. So, what I am going to do now is focus on the calorie intake. It seems to lose weight, 1600 calories a day is where I should aim. I am starting today: writing down what I eat and keeping track of fat, protein, and fiber. I am also trying to figure what to eat to make me stay full and satisfied so I don't fall off the wagon.

I am also NOT going to weigh myself. I just don't feel like dealing with those numbers. So, each Monday I will do a "dress-in." I will try on the same dress to see how it fits as the weeks go by.

So far the day started out pretty good. I made an eggwhite zuchhini omelet, and had a no-sugar added carnation instant breakfast. 233 calories, 7.5 grams of fat, 21 grams of protetin, and 5 grams of fiber.

This is going to be a long day...

I miss running.

2009-06-20T18:13:00.001-07:00

Like, a lot.

new plan...

2009-06-05T22:15:00.000-07:00

Physical therapy is going well, though not able to do one full pedal stroke on the stationary bike. This made me swallow my pride and decide that Aquabike is not happening. And maybe no other races are happening this year.

Kinda sucks.

But I have a new plan.

It's time for a vacay.

So, instead of spending my money on race entry fees (ranging from $25 to $200!), hotel fees, and post-race beers---it will go towards a much needed vacation with Dennis.

I just booked a 4 day all inclusive trip to cancun for our 3rd anniversary in September. Yea!

I may still go up the day of Vineman so I can cheer all my fellow Mermaids on at the finish. They are going to rock it.

knee update #1

2009-05-31T14:40:00.000-07:00

Bad news: knee still has issues.
Good news: am off crutches.

I spent last week on crutches and it was brutal. I seriously got winded walking from the porch to my car. At least I could drive!

I went to an orthopedic surgeon on Friday. I got xrays of my knees, a new brace made of neoprene, and a prescription for physical therapy. My appointment is tomorrow, so we will see how that goes.

Yesterday was my first full day with the new brace and I decided to go swimming (arms only). I did 10 laps and felt pretty good. Today I did 40 laps. Dennis said that maybe I will come out of this a better swimmer. Could be nice.

It is definitely weird not being able to bend my left knee when I walk--I kinda feel like Kevin Spacey as Caiser Sozee (sp?) on The Usual Suspects. It is definitely weird not being able to walk fast through the grocery store. But, it was nice being able to go grocery shopping and even get ready to make dinner tonight.

I am hoping for a good prognosis tomorrow---like, with enough physical therapy I can do the aquabike at vineman in August.

We shall see...

are you serious?

2009-05-23T09:14:00.000-07:00

So...I am stuck on the couch again...on Thursday night I was making some chocolate chip cookies for Dennis' company picnic and as I was rushing to the refrigerator I smacked right into an open cupboard. Unfortunately, it was at the right angle to smack my kneecap out of place. The same knee I had surgery on 16 years ago.

Luckily I landed on my opposite side and not my head or anything. I heard Dennis say from the living room, "That didn't sound good" and then I started yelling at him "Dennis call 911! I dislocated my knee! Call 911 NOWWWW!"

I used my right arm to prop myseld up and my left hand had a tight clench on my pant legs to keep my leg from moving. I knew from experience that any movement of my leg would cause my knee to seize up. Dennis came around and saw my the outline of my knee cap poking through my cargo pants and said, "Ooh yeah. That doesn't belong there."

Suddenly there were 5 paramedics in my kitchen asking what was going on. One took a look at the kitchen and said, "Looks like someone was making cookies."

I told them what happened and they asked for all my information and took my blood pressure, checked my heart rate.

(Side note: after they took my heart rate they asked if I was an athlete because it was so low! How awesome is that?)

They used this metal gurney thing and gradually rotated me on it and put me in the ambulance. The nice EMT asked me if I needed morphine. I was actually feeling ok, and not in a lot of pain and said I would wait until we got to the hospital and they would pop it back in.

Then my adrenaline wore off and we kept hitting all these bumpy potholes in the ambulance drive over and I was moving around, in pain.
"Yeah, I will take the happy juice."

He tried to find a vein for the iv in my left arm, but I always have issues with people finindg a vein for a needle. The ambulance was nice enough to stop to pull over for him to put it in my right arm. The pain subsided a bit and finally we got to the hospital. I waited around in a room, the nurses came and took my blood pressure. The doctor came in and took a look at my knee. I was really not looking forward to him popping it back in because I remembered the pain from the first time. They gave me a nice cocktail of pain medicine and an anti-anxiety drug.

Dennis came to the room and I guess I was saying some silly things to him. This is sorta what I remember:
"Do you have a hair tie in my purse---I need to pull it up because it is going to look big."
"I just ordered a bikini ---looks like getting into shape won't be happening too soon. I wonder if I can return it...no it was super cheap so it is fine to keep it."

The doctor came back to try to pop it back in place. It wasn't going in that easily so he had someone take an x-ray. Turns out not only did it move to the left side, it also shifted up." Dennis gave me his hand to squeeze and I braced myself for the uncomfort of placing the kneecap back in its place.

Then they put this removable brace on me that goes from my upper thigh to my ankle. They gave me cruches and I tried to hobble around but the meds made me a little loopy and unstable. They put me in a wheelchair and Dennis went to go get his car. Somehow we managed to get both me and my crutches in the front seat of his tiny boxter.

So...this pretty much sucks. It is day two and I can't put weight on my foot. Poor Dennis has to be at my beck and call ("can I have some water?" "I need a kleenex." "Can you help me condition my hair."). Going up the stairs is always fun because I basically scoot up each stair on my butt.

I have an appointment with an ortho doc next week. Not sure what this will mean for my training and the rest of the race season. I got pretty upset this morning because I just can't do anything that I want to do. My friends are all facebooking about their workouts and I am just green with envy. It is interesting to compare this time around with when it first happened 17 years ago. My training has helped me immensely with getting around. I don't feel super unstable putting all my weight on one leg because it is actually pretty strong from my crazy workouts. The Thursday morning core workouts also helped with me using those muscles to help me scoot up the stairs.

So, here is where I am...I am bored and going stir crazy, but hopefully the recovery period will be short and I can get back to moving...

Workout Diary Day 1

2009-05-10T13:33:00.000-07:00

I have decided to write a daily recap of my workouts going forward. The point of this is to see if I can gauge improvements, pinpoint mistakes, and truly get on the right track for Barb's domination. I am starting with yesterday.

8 am ran a 10k fundraiser for work in Santa Rosa. It was very hilly and I took it easy as I was meeting a friend for long bike ride after. The run didn't feel great and my time was a very blah 1:06.

10:45 biked the Wine Country Century Course with my friend. It sucked. I still need to get my bike fitted after having to replace my seat and handlebars. My form was out of whack and I was getting a weird side stitch from pressing down on my tummy. The ride took forever, and my legs we tired from running 6 miles. Less than 3 months till Barb's. I need to get better on the bike. Ugh.

Today is a rest day. I may do a short run with my niece (1 mile max).

April Events: A Recap

2009-04-27T19:19:00.000-07:00

March 28 (technically not April, but blog worthy), El Toro Hike, Morgan Hill: This is the only day of the year El Toro is open to the public to hike. I had hiked it before, but never to the top. It is a great hike, but whooo---eee! The last stretch of the climb has two ropes that you hold on to because it is way steep. My heart rate was maxed out, but I made it to the top and enjoyed lovely panoramic views of Morgan Hill. Going down was a bit challenging. I slipped 5 times, but luckily had a firm grasp on the ropes. I must have looked ridiculous falling in my aqua blue running skirt and "Find Your Happy Pace" t-shirt. Fortunately I didn't take any small children down with me. All in all, a great challenge and way to get out of my comfort zone.

March 29, Training ride for Cinderella: My friend LaRee and I biked 45 miles of the route. I hadn't been on a bike seat in a month, so after two hours I was toast. We biked through Livermore and the wind was brutal! We were going 6 MPH on a FLAT road. Ugh.

April 4, Cinderella Ride: Super duper cold in the morning as we left the Pleasanton Fairgrounds. Lots of people dress up for this ride. Not to toot my own horn, but our costumes were the best. We were ladybugs. Thank goodness for the internet, because you can buy halloween costumes year-round. I had black and red knee high socks, wings, and antenna attached to my helmet. The ride was great and it finally warmed up at the end! Some of the beginner riders need to become a but familiar with the rules of the road (i.e. don't stop suddenly in the street if there are a pack of riders behind you)

April 5, Wildflower 5k: Another fun event in Morgan Hill. I probably could have gone a tad faster, but still recovering from the 63 miles from Cinderella.

April 11, Icebreaker Swim: This was a fun, non-competitive open water swim in Lake Folsom. Brrrr! The water was cold and I forgot how panic-y I can get when I haven't trained in open water. Only swam 1/2 mile---my hardcore friend did the loop twice!

April 12: Biked from my house in Cupertino to parents house in Morgan Hill. Lovely ride except for a punk kid on a mountain bike not letting me pass him on Camden ave. He was struggling up the hill, so I poised myself to pass and then he saw me and went faster. This went on for about 5 minutes. Ugh...egos of teenage boys.

April 18, bike ride in Castro Valley with Team Mermaid and Giant for Women: Super fun and great group of women.

April 19, Bike Uvas tri course with the two Gina's from Mermaid: I am only doing the run for the relay, but any opportunity for a training ride is important for me. One good hill. I love cycling in Morgan Hill

April 25, Mermaid Swim Clinic: good to get back in the open water. Was supposed to go on a bike ride after, but bike was unrideable after being scraped down the freeway.

April 26, Mission City 5k: I did this race with Dennis, and my 11-year-old niece. It was a blast because you get to run through Great America. Dennis did great considering it was his first race ever (very cute how he looked befuddled with putting the bib on). My niece, whom I did Girls on the Run with last year, did fantastic! She yacked towards the end (did the same thing last year, and Aunt Jill even made sure she had breakfast this time!)---but that just makes her more hardcore because she finished strong!

On the radar for May: The Human Race in Sonoma, Uvas relay, and Morgan Hill Mushroom Mardi Gras 5k/10k.

On a side note---I miss my bike. :( Hope the parts come in soon!

Triathlon season has begun!

2009-04-23T22:21:00.000-07:00

Seriously lagging on the blog. Perhaps I was waiting for an epiphany....like the voice over narration on "The Wonder Years" where adult Kevin Arnold goes discusses a life changing event and starts the monlogue with "and then it happened."

whoa...side note...is "Wonder Years" on dvd? I am so Netflixing that.

Anyways, April has been great and crazy. I raced 2 5ks, hiked a crazy hill, swam in a lake, and biked a little over 150 miles, turned 32, celebrated my one year anniversary in the non-profit world, and---still don't feel strong. Like, sporty strong.

I blame the triathlon training--I keep introducing a different sport while the other sport goes, wait wait, we aren't finished yet. Case in point: I probably have ran max 25 miles in April. Why? Getting back to the biking makes the running less desirable. Add jumping into the pool in the mix, and I totally stress about being slow as molasses in my freestyling.

My solution to all of this is two-fold: get back on to Calendars with Coach Heidi AND join a masters swim program.

Stay tuned for reports for April events. I swear they are coming!

FYI: the above picture of my bike handlebars was taken this weekend. My bike fell off its rack while I was driving, got stuck to the rack and was dragged on the freeway! The bike is ok, but I am out one road bike until the parts come in (seat got destroyed as well). I think I will take the folding bike to my workout tomorrow. That should be interesting.

Mother Nature kicked my bootie.

2009-03-22T17:36:00.000-07:00

Today was the first BIG race of 2009: Mermaid half marathon.

It was my slowest 1/2. Ever.

And I am fine with that.

No, really I am.

Admittedly, I did not train well for this race. My training OCD hasn't kicked in yet. I did an 11 mile run a couple weeks ago---but never really got back on track after that.

I woke up this morning, drank my coffee and ate my oatmeal. I looked out the window and it seemed like the sun was coming out for my race. Yea! So much for chance of showers---take that weatherman! It was still chilly looking so I opted for my long sleeve hoodie and running skort with capris. Usually I wear a skort and tank top for a 1/2, but was afraid of the possibly ominous weather.

So, how was the race?

Mother nature kicked my bootie. The race started in Shoreline park in Mountain View at 8:30. I decided that I would listen to my mp3 to help my untrained soul get through the race. I unfortunately forgot to change the battery. 40 seconds into the race it died. I was equipped with my garmin to help me stay on track. I did my first mile faster than antipated: 9:30. I was keeping the pace pretty well until mile 3.

That is when the wind dropped in.

OK, it sucks running against the wind. Like, really sucks. But, I tried to look on the bright side that I will be running with the wind on the way back. The wind was so brutal that I threw my ego out the door and turned off my garmin. I knew this would not be a PR and I didn't want to deal with keeping track of my pace.

So, around mile 5 the trail turned from gravel to dirt. Except, the rain we have had recently turned it into mud. If you don't know how well I run in mud, check out my trail running entry back in January.
Fortunately, the mud wasn't slippery--but it was thick. I wasn't wearing my trail shoes and it caked in my beloved pink asics. My shoes became very heavy and I was running so slow that it felt like those dreams where you try to run but can't move.

After the turn around I ran with the wind for awhile. But then the wind turned violent and into a crosswind. Then the rain started. The prickly, ice cold rain mixed with crosswinds cemeted the fact that this was not going to be my race.

I finally made it to the finish line. I didn't even care what my time was.

A couple hours ago they posted the results, and it was my slowest race ever. But I did a little research and found another 1/2 on April 12th. I think I can redeem myself.

As long as Mother Nature behaves herself.

Long time no blog...

2009-03-13T10:45:00.000-07:00

ech...been a very fair weather blogger these days.
Here is a summary of the past few weeks:

1) Ran my first race in 2009. I ran the Jenny's Light 5k the first weekend of March. It was rainy.For some reasons a 5k is almost as tough as a 1/2 marathon. I am not a short distance kind of gal---it takes me a few miles to find my groove. It was a good race for a great cause.

2) Ran the longest run of 2009 last week. I ran 11 miles on the Los Gatos Creek trail last weekend. Weather was gorgeous! Plus, I discovered a new band I like (The Bird and The Bee) and immediately bought the mp3 album from Amazon and ran to some great tunes. I am, however, a pretty slow runner. Oh well.

3) I signed up for a pre-masters swim class. I went to one class and wasn't feeling it. I think I definitely need to figure out how to get faster in the pool. I like the DeAnza classes I have taken in the past, but jumping in the Pool at 6:30 in the morning is not my cup of tea. I am not hardcore like melissa from mermaids who even swims at 6am on Saturdays. Wish I was.

4) My back is better which means one thing---I can do the core torture workouts with Mermaids. Is this a good thing? She had us do squats and jump rope around the track yesterday. It was a great workout, but I am like a little old lady when I get put of my chair right now.

5) I have a 1/2 marathon on March 22. My goal: finish it. I know that is setting the bar low, but I don't want to deal with aiming for PRs right now. This race will be a good gauge to see where I am at.

6) I need to get on my bike. For reals. Maybe ride this Sunday?

7) I think I may do a full marathon in December--the California International Marathon in Sacramento. I already booked my hotel room. Right now I am mulling over how to bounce back from Barb's 1/2 ironman in August to start training for a full marathonin December. Plus, I have to seriously start thinking about my training for barb's.

That is it for now. Toodles.

Get off the couch...

2009-02-24T12:25:00.000-08:00

So, I am officially registered for a 5k on March 1st and 1/2 Marathon on March 22nd. Guess it is time to get off the couch and stop blogging about hair and kitty condos and start running.

Yea?

The Felicity Syndrome

2009-02-20T08:59:00.000-08:00

I am totally, completely out of shape and what does it make me what to do?

Chop my hair off.

OK, let me backtrack here...

So, I started the month of February with wide-eyed optimism. I decided to join Mermaids again and get back on track with working out. We met the first Tuesday night in February for a track work out. She had us run a couple easy laps and gradually work up to a fast pace. It was tough, but I felt so good after the run. I was ready to attack my training season.

We also meet on Thursday mornings. At 6am. Yeah, seriously. But, I went to the first morning workout super proud of myself for making this commitment. After a couple of laps around the track we settled in to do our core torture (i.e. situps, pushups, and other excruciating trunk strengthening moves). We did one move holding hand weights and twisting our bodies so our hands touched our toes. Well, I guess my posture and form wasn't that great and the 3rd time I went down---SNAP! I threw my back out.

I am starting to feel my (almost) 32 years.

I spent the next two days icing my back on the couch and freaking out that I would be injured for life and never be able to do a triathlon agaon and will spend my days in a mumu watching The Price Is Right.

I can be a tad dramatic.

So, for the past two weeks I have been back to the lazy Jill I was in the off-season, trying to take it easy on my back. The problem with not working out is that it negatively affects my mood. Without those endorphins I am used to, I just feel blah...and like a blob.

It was last week when I was watching the Flight of the Conchords tand here was a music video with a girl who had hair similar to mine in a super cute cut. It planted a seed. I wanted that haircut.

I obsessed about it for the next couple of days. See, since September I have decided to grow my hair out. I go through this every couple of years, thinking I want long curly locks...all the while forgetting how long it takes to grow out. It is not that my hair grows slowly, it just grows TIGHT. If you pull a 1 inch curl straight, it almost doubles in length.

The problem with growing it out is there is inevitably an awkward period where my hair is all over the place. Right now it is in the "Weird Al" stage. Not a good look.

But the more I thought about when I chopped my hair off in the past, I made a realization. I was going through the Felicity Syndrome.

During the second season of Felicity (the beloved show on the now non-existent WB), the title character chopped off her curly locks after a major breakup with her soul mate Ben. I realized that I do the same thing--not because of a breakup, but more when something is off-kilter in my life. Changing my hair provides instant results. I was sluggish and not able to work out and craved something to get me out of my funk. Cutting my hair in a cute NEW style would be a change, So, more or less, not being able to workout and getting those mood boosting endorphins indirectly affects the length of my hair.

Luckily, my back is feeling better and I have ran twice this week. I have decided the hair will stay at this length. For now.

Now the question is---am I ready for a half marathon in less than a month?

In these tough economic times, can a girl still tri?

2009-02-04T14:06:00.000-08:00

Let's get one thing clear---it kind of sucks right now. Every evening I drive home from work listening to KGO and it stressed me out. One huge company is making layoffs, a big percentage of people are underwater on their mortgages, the state budget is wack, consumer spending is down...where is the good news?

I am feeling the pennies being pinched as well---less than a year of home ownership under my belt in this crazy economy and now I have to look around to see what corners can be cut. Which means, limiting trips to Banana Republic and Ann Taylor Loft and trying to ween myself off of Pureology's hair crack, I mean conditioner. I even asked hubby if he would consider coloring my hair from now on.

"I mean," I said, "It costs me like 90 bucks to highlight it every 6 weeks (though admittedly I push it to the max 9-10 weeks until I feel totally root-y tutti and the natural brown is at odds with the blond streaks). Plus, I am sure you can find out how to do it on-line and you are such a perfectionist it would come out amazing. I mean, look at the kitty condo."

Operation Kitty Condo is a shining example of how my husband doesn't do anything half-a**ed. We wanted to get a kitty, but he is allergic to cats and with a one bedroom one bath town home, there isn't really room for a cat to escape or have a litter box area. Thus, Operation Kitty Condo (OKC) was born. For much of December and January hubby (with help from his father) built an enclosed platform in the garage that a kitty could access from a kitty door in the kitchen. The platform is large enough to hold a litter box, kitty bed, food water and other accoutrements. Plus, the lattice enclosure lets the kitty have air, but not free reign of the garage (read: get footprints all over hubby's boxster or take naps in clean laundry I was too lazy to take upstairs). OKC also included installing a new (fire safe) garage door, and installing doors at the bottom of the stairs so kitty will not have access to the upstairs which will be a kitty-free zone for allergy-prone hubby to seek refuge. OKC was a major operation that took over our living room and had so many trip to Home Depot that it is now worth more than the blue book value of my busted up 94 Nissan Sentra.

It is actually a pretty amazing thing that hubby built, and his attention to detail secretly makes me hope he never gets into triathloning. For me, Triathlon is an obvious sport of choice because I can do lots of things at once and not burn myself out on the boredom of one sport. For hubby, I thnk he would go overboard with learning about each sport (cadence, swim drills, tempo runs, fartleks, tapering, hydrating) and it would be too much to handle. This is also why he doesn't get into wine, otherwise he would probably start building a wine cellar on our patio.

So, where was I? Oh yeah, homemade highlights. So, hubby mulled over the "highlighting his wife at home" idea.

"I bet it isn't that hard and I can probably buy on-line the chemicals they use in the salon."

"Yeah, and then you can learn how to, like, wax my eyebrows."

I pretty much lost him after that suggestion. I guess the idea of violently ripping hair off my face does not appeal to him. Oh well.

So, I will keep the buying cute tops to a bare minimum and continue my salon visits. Man, I couldn't imagine it if I was a high-maintainance girl who required regular pore extractions and manicures. The only reasons I pedicure is to have someone else cut my toenails and slough off my running-induced callouses.

But, the real question is: in these tough economic times, can a girl still tri?

Triathlons are a ridiculously expensive sport. With running you just need shoes. Swimming you need a cap, goggles and suit. Cycling you need bike, helmet, gloves, hideous padded shorts, and cycling shoes. Throw the three sports together and toss in energy bars and race entry fees that range from 60-300 bucks, and you've got yourself a sport that seems blatantly at odds with the financial crisis of 2009.

But, my salon visits and triathlons are things I will not compromise in these times. I won't race as many races as I did last year, but I think that the benefits of the tri far outweigh the negatives. In times like this when everything is upsidedown and uncertain, it is refreshing to have a goal that is constant. You sign up for a race and spend your free time training for it. The race happens and you go on to your next race. It is riculously logical, but challenging enough to not be boring.

I found triathlons when I was in a fragile state: I was a manager in a mortgage company experiencing the most gruesome part of the subprime meltdown of 2007. Rates were constantly going up as loan amounts went down and brokers were pledging their undying hatred of me. As a manager of account managers, I was the one brokers asked to talk to so they could blame someone for their customer's rate soaring to 13% after one unfortunate rate hike. Mind you, I wasn't the one who made the rates go up, but I was the last person in the office a broker had to go through to complain about how much our company sucked. Our office closed about a month after that time.

I found and loved triathlons because it was such a refreshing contrast to the greedy, slick and hasty mortgage industry. It was something totally selfish to do: concentrate my time and efforts to finish a race I had no dreams or delusions of winning.

Every single race I have done has taught me something. My first triathlon taught me what the sport is all about. When I did the LA Triathlon I was amazed that I could swim almost a mile in the ocean without having a Jaws-induced panick attack. Barb's triathlon taught me that failing at something you work hard at is always a possibility. Finishing the Big Kahuna two months later made me realize that failing once doesn't mean you give up forever.

In these uncertain times, everyone needs something like a triathlon to keep them grounded, hopepful, and less jaded in this world that seems to be in a constant state of suck. What can I say? Endorphins are my therapy.

The Food Post

2009-01-26T08:14:00.000-08:00

Today was a very "Monday" Monday, so when hubby asked about dinner I felt lazy and said , "Fresh Choice?" Plus, I had a coupon. So, when he got home, we piled in my Sentra and headed to the Land of Salad Bars. We had just left our townhouse complex when I said, "Aw man." Hubby asked why and I told him I left the coupon at home. We both said in unison, "It's too late. We've gone too far."

After I had eaten my salad, I headed to carb corner (also known as pasta, potato, and bread section). As I spooned some mac and cheese in a bowl something seemed different. There were the usual signs above the foods, but what was that writing below "Yankee Doodle Mac and Cheese." Wait? Is it telling me the fat and calories? I ran over to the pizza section--140 calories for a square? One little square? I could eat 4 of those. I think in the past I have eaten 4 of those.

Ok, so yeah, we knew this day was coming: restaurants displaying the nutritional values. Fresh Choice is just ahead of the curve (or regulations---whatever comes first). Ordinarily, I would think this is a good thing--a step in the right direction of a healthy America and lowering obesity rates. But tonight I didn't want to know how many calories were in that hunk of bread pudding.

So this brings me to the long overdue Food Post.

In my just slightly over a year blogging, I have avoided this topic. Why? Because being consistent with eating well is perhaps even tougher than triathlon training.

I wish that I could be someone who looks at food as just fuel for the body and eat nuts and spinach and high in omega 3 or good fat fishes. I mean, I do try to eat my veggies and fruit but eating well is something I have struggled with my whole life. I love food. I love chocolate, cheese, bread, meats! I crave that pint of Fat Tire after a triathlon. All of it. I have tried a couple eating plans--best success with weight watchers, but the group meetings became a bit much--too much talk about feelings and leaders with no personalities. I did the special k diet the summer I got married (though that is kind of cheating because motivation increases with impending nuptials). I keep trying to do Special K, but all that cereal is kinda tiresome. I have never tried Atkins or South Beach. I know what my problem is--I just need to eat. Less. And Move. More.

I think what my problem is that I think that everything needs to change all at what: diet and exercise. So then I go all in and try to keep up with a crazy new work out plan and eating less carbs and more proteins and veggies. I last about two days because it seems overwhelming and hopeless. And then I say, "Screw it." And buy a slice of chocolate cake from Safeway for dessert to share with Hubby and skip my workout.

So, right now I am going to focus more on the moving. Last week I exercies 5 out of 7 days (last time I did that was probably August!). As I continue to workout like this, I will be mindful of what I eat, and then probably late next week I will step back and examine my eating and how I can fuel my body the right way.

Darn you Fresh Choice.

Out of My Comfort Zone

2009-01-24T17:36:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I had to decide between running a 10 mile race in San Juan Bautista or joining some friends for a casual run in Aptos. Here was my thought process in choosing:
1) I was pretty antsy to run my first race of 2009
2) It would be nice to see Coach Heidi at the trail run
3) Can you really say "no" to a 10 am race start time
4) Going over highway 17 in this weather was not appealing
5) Neither was forking over 25 bucks for a race entry fee

In end I chose the trail run because of the money and it would be easier than 10 miles.

I thought wrong.

Right before I left for my run I went to the garage to put my shoes on. I didn't see my trail running shoes and had a slight feeling that I probably should wear them (the facebook event invite was titled "muddy trails await" but the shoes were all the way upstairs which seemed to far. Only now do I see the irony of being too lazy to get my shoes upstairs before I go on a run.

So, I put on my lovely new pink asics and headed off. I didn't have breakfast, so I stopped by McDonald's for a small coffee and egg mcmuffin sans Canadian bacon (I know! I know! I think it is time for a nutrition blog entry) and headed for Aptos.

We met at a place where you can access a trail at Nicsene Marks. I hugged Coach Heidi as I was excited to see her and we were off. Once we hit the trail i thought to myself, "Holy crap Jill. What did you get yourself into?"

It was straight downhill and super muddy. It was my--a super klutz with balance issues--worst nightmare. I took a deep breath and concentrated on every step of my run. We were running for about 3 minutes when we hit a creek that we had to run across. I followed my friend Gina's lead and bounced across rocks in the creek, trying to make it seem like I knew what I was doing. I pretended I was an REI model and my trek was all part of a photo shoot to sell trail running skirts. Except I don't think America's Next Trail Runner Model would step right into the deep part of the creek soaking her new shoes.

So, running through muddy trails is probably one of the most challenging things I have done. Usually running is a time for me to shut my brain off and listen to some awesomely crappy songs in the privacy of my mp3. But with trail running, you have to concentrate on everything. The trail, your stride, other runners, critters--everything! I haven't concentrated this hard since beating Ganon in the Legend of Zelda Wind Waker. I was definitely out of my comfort zone.

I was wheezing and sliding and after 50 minutes we turned around. Then the inevitable happened: I bit it. I wasn't careful in a step and then woosh---I was sliding down a ravine. Luckily the mud was pretty thick and my sliding was slow so I was able to stretch my arm far enough to reach coach Heidi's husband hand. But as I tried to step up it got super slippy. It all happened in slow motion and part of me felt like I should just keep sliding. But then I looked down thought two things: "hmmm, that is kinda far down. Not quite sure how I would get back up." And: "Dude, didn't this happen to Kate on Lost when they were running in the jungle away from an Arctic bear or smoke monster thingy?"

Luckily the guys pulled me up and I thanked them profusely. We continued my run and I realized that I was super muddy--and it was kind of a cool feeling. I still can't believe people do crazy 50 mile trail runs.

After the run, I went to my car and drove home. On the drive I though about how important it is for me to get out of my comfort zone in my training. It is challenging and it increases my skills as well as boosts my confidence in myself as an athlete---something I have been lacking in the last couple of months.

I think training season has officially begun.

Stuff I Dig (AKA : so this is where my money went)

2009-01-12T14:13:00.000-08:00

Last summer Runner's World featured a whole spread on running skirts. They had various reviews, a bio of the founder of SkirtSports, and articles from runners who were for or against running skirts. There were actually a few letters from readers in the issues following the spread either ranting or raving on running skirts. Some argued that running isn't about looking pretty, and if you wear a skirt you aren't taken seriously. Some swore by running skirts being super comfy and flattering.

And what are my thoughts on running skirts?

Um...I just did a tally in my head and I own 7.

I guess I am pro skirt.

I know---7! I am a little embarrassed at this number. But in truth, they aren't all running skirts. One is for triathlons and another is for cycling. I just got running skirt number 7 from Athleta.com (if you haven't visited their site, go now! They have cute, cute, cute clothes!). This skirt is different from the others because instead of little shorties underneath, it has capris, so it is perfect for colder weather. My favorite running skirts are actually made by Target---crazy, huh? I love them as they are comfortable (not too snug and not too loose), the shorts don't ride up, there is a pocket for key/cash/id, and they are cheap (I don't think I paid more than 20 bucks for either of them).

I love running skirts because there is something playful about running in a skirt. It reminds me of recess and wearing shorts under my dresses so I could play on the jungle gym. There is also a lot more freedom of movement with the skirts.

Plus, I am totally a girly-girl when it comes to workout stuff. Some girls dream about taffeta layers on wedding dresses and strappy manolos. Me? I love flowery cycling jerseys and the color pink. I am a little obsessed with pink---but more as an accent color. I have pink handlebars, a pink ankle road id, pink yoga headband and mat, and (new!) white and pink Asics Gt-2130s!

Why do I love the girly stuff? I think it is partially because some of the stuff associated with triathlons can get rather grueling and pink is a reminder too not take things too seriously and just have fun.

Change of Plans

2009-01-11T17:12:00.000-08:00

So, my whole plan of starting a 5 week half marathon training program was not the smartest idea. I did manage to run 8 miles last Sunday---which felt good---but running 5 miles on Tuesday and Thursday did not seem feasible. Here is my new plan:

I downloaded Ryan Hall's 10 week half-marathon training plan from Runnersworld.com. The plan outlines each day what you are supposed to do and there seems to be a lot of variety to hold my interest. I decided to scratch the Kaiser half-marathon because driving all the way to the city just to turn back after did not seem appealing. My goal is to beat last year's time for the Mermaid Half-Marathon. This year's race is on March 22nd which is a good amount of time for me to get back into shape in a smart way.

I also would like to improve my 10k time on the way and am planning on doing the 10k race in Campbell on Valentines Day. I have done that race before and know the trail very well.

Other plans:
1) Use my 24 Hour Fitness Membership: I will try to make more of an effort to do yoga, pilates, and spinning on my cross-training days

2) Cycle on the weekend day that I don't have a long run. I cycled with some Mermaid friends yesterday and it was a gorgeous day. I really want to get stronger on the bike and need to get more time in the saddle this winter. Plus, I think it may be time for aerobars ---those kind of scare me.

3) Core training: I will do more core work and also arm work as I tend to neglect those parts in my training.

4) I will also check out an intro to masters swimming class at one of the community centers in February. Our pool will be heated in March, so this may be a good jump start to getting back into the water.

5) I still want to learn to surf. Don't know when that will happen though.

Nice to meet you, 2009

2009-01-03T20:17:00.000-08:00

This is the blog entry that is all about reflecting on the past year and looking toward the year ahead and blah, blah, blah.

What can I say about 2008? It was pretty good. I did a 1/2 ironman, swam alcatraz, and got a mild concussion and awesome crazy road rash after crashing my bike. And now it is the beginning of 2009 and guess what? I am back to the not-very-much-in-shape shape I was in this time last year.

So, what does a Jill do to get back on that proverbial horse? She signs up for races.

I have decided that the motivating factor for me to train, is to have a race to train for. I am going to sign up for the Kaiser 1/2 marathon on Superbowl Sunday in SF. It is a month away and a race I have never done before. Plus, Super Bowl treats will taste yummy after 13.1 miles.

Yesterday I decided to google a "train in a month 1/2 marathon plan" and guess what? The internet is not as useful as it once was. I basically got every web page that had the word "1/2 marathon" and "month" in it. One guy posted something about not being a runner and wanting to train for a full marathon in a month and asked in a forum how he should train. He pretty much got a lot of "Don't do it dude" posts.

So I found a 9 week training plan and will be starting it at week 5. I enterred all my future runs in my outlook calendar at work and now it feels like I have something to work towards.

I went on my first run of 2009 yesterday. I hit up my usual trail in Campbell and decided to multitask and get a pound of coffee after my run. So, I zipped up my running jacket and put my atm card and key in one of the pockets and my mp3 in the other and zipped up the.pockets
Or so I thought
After my 3 mile run I headed back towards my car which was parked near downtown and got a weird panicky feeling. I shoved my hands in my pockets and my panic was confirmed---my ATM card and car key were gone!

I headed back to the trail to retrace my steps and looked all over for the key and card. No luck. I used the phone at a bookstore and called Dennis to let him know about my situation. He said he would leave work immediately and go home to find a spare key. He asked me where the spare key was.

"Um," I said, "I don't know if I have one."

I then walked to the bank to cancel my card and had time to spare before Dennis met me. I went back to the trail to look again. No luck. My first 3 mile training run turned into a 3 mile run, 4 mile walk.

Fortunately Dennis found a spare key and I was able to get into my car and drive home. So far, I am not too impressed with 2009.

In addition to the Kaiser 1/2 marathon, here are the other events I plan on doing in 2009:

Mermaid 1/2 Marathon
Tierra Bella bike ride (either metric or full century)
San Jose Olympic triathlon
Big Kahuna

It is a tough decision, but I don't think I should be as race crazy as I was before. I would like to do one "destination" race this year, but that depends on our travel plans.

So, tomorrow I am going to attempt 8 miles. I think I need some better tune-age in my Mp3. Any music suggestions?

The Winter Squishies

2008-12-20T13:18:00.000-08:00

I just came back from a 3 hour bike ride and the reality of just how out of shape I am is on my shoulders. I originally started with 9 other women and we were going to do a casual ride from San Jose and around the Morgan Hill reservoirs. I huffed and puffed my way up Bailey Road at about mile 5, fearful that my legs and lungs would turn against me at any moment. I made it up the hill, but at the first rest stop I told the other women to go on without me. I didn't want them to have to wait for me at every stop. So, I continued on and rode through Morgan Hill and the Coyote Creek Trail, all the while thinking, "I used to be able to do this faster and more efficiently." Not so much today. In fact, that first killer hill wasn't even that bad. I did it twice last year (once in a training ride and once in the San Jose Triathlon) without any problems. But today I felt like that scene in Knocked Up where Seth Rogan is taking a spin class ("I'm breathing like James Gandolphon over here.").

The truth is --- I have been a lazy, lazy girl. The winter is supposed to be about base training, strengthening your core and all that. The only thing I am strengthening are my fingers playing Guitar Hero. Plus---I have a major case of the Winter Squishies.

The Winter Squishies occur when one moves less, and eats more. What happens is that body parts that used to be firmer are now squishy. I mean, I know I am not going to be Heidi Klum or anything, but with this economy and all I don't think I can afford new (bigger) pants.

So now what? Do I need a goal? A race to sign up for? A commitment of working out a certain number of days a week and eating the FDA recommended servings of fruits and vegetables a day?

I will ponder this some more...and hopefully not eat anymore cookies.

Full Circle?

2008-11-13T20:10:00.001-08:00

My last triathlon of 2008 was last Saturday in Catalina. Not my worst race, but not my best.

Let's do the whole full circle thing and show a side-by-side comparison of my FIRST 08 triathlon in March and then this one.

Swim:
Cal Poly Tri March 08 800 yard: 18:33 Catalina Tri 1/2 mile swim : 16:40

Bike:
Cal Poly 14 miles 1:10 Catalina Tri 9 miles 50:21
Run 3.1 miles 40:17 Catalina Tri 3 miles 35:29

Hmmm...what does all this mean? From numbers alone, it looks like not a whole lot of improvement was made in 8 months. But, when I look at some of the races sandwiches into those, I see a much stronger racer. My race results are like a richter scale: slow in the begining with peaks and valleys of improvement in the middle, then back to mediocre.

As I have mentioned before, it is time for a race break. I did sign up for Turkey Trot---but that has become my Thanksgiving Tradition. But now it is time for reflection on racing for 2009 as well as focusing my attention on other things, like painting the living room or cleaning the kitchen.

I feel like my foundation is there, but there is a missing link into making me a stronger athlete. So, this week I have gloriously not worked out and I think it will be a good time to refocus and recharge.

Any suggestions?

What is it about races that make it a more appealing hobby than, say, scrapbooking?

2008-11-04T08:27:00.000-08:00

A couple weeks ago I was talking to a good friend about weekend plans. I told her that I was going to do the Nike 1/2 marathon and the Catalina triathlon a few weeks later. She then asked me:

"So, how many more of these things are you going to do?"

In all honesty, I was pretty miffed about this question. Though it may not have been her intention, the way she phrased it made it seem like races were just a phase for me. But the thing is, I hope that races aren't a phase. I hope to still be doing triathlons in my 70s and have my age proudly magic markered on my slightly liver-spotted calf.

My friend just didn't get it. So, I responded in a very adult-like fashion:

"I dunno, how many more times are you going to go to the mall and buy shoes?"

Ouch. OK, maybe that was a slightly passive-aggressive response. I never said I was perfect, right?

Perhaps my hyper-sensitivity to my racing being just a "thing" is that deep down I fear that it is a pointless thing to do. I have done over 10 races this year, spent probably more money on gear than my car is worth, sacrificed time with friends and family and tried to jam race t-shirts I will never wear in my overly stuffed dresser. I swim in disgusting water, have calloused feet and STILL can't run a sub 2 hour 1/2 marathon.

Why am I doing this?

What is it about races that make it a more appealing hobby than, say, scrapbooking or yoga?

I tell you why I do this:

Races force me to be a control freak.

2007 was not the greatest year for me. I turned 30 and went through my first layoff. The layoff was rough for me because I spent 3 years at this job, moving my way up the famous corporate ladder and finally found myself in a position where I enjoyed what I was doing and felt like a valued contributor to the company. And then that job security got ripped from me as abrupt and painful as Steve Carrel getting his chest waxed in the 40 year old Virgin.

I spent November and December of last year sending off resumes, trying to find a new career path (I was in the sub-prime mortgage industry---and we all know how that little tale ended) and ultimately felt like I had lost my wayand direction in life.

Then I found the Barb's Race triathlon on-line and signed up for a half ironman at the end of December of last year. I may not have known what I was going to do with my career, but at least I had something I could work towards: a goal, a challenge--something that forced me to test myself and gain the sense of completion.

Training for Barb's forced me to discipline myself in ways I hadn't done in a long time. I am a kind of "fly by the seat of my pants" gal and here I was plotting all my workouts on my personal and outlook calendars. I diligently did my brick workouts and put personal plans on hold so I could work toward my goal. Deep down I feared that maybe a half-ironman was aiming a little too high for me. Whenever I told people what I was doing, their reaction was of disbelief. So instead of facing my fears of failure, I took a different path: I signed up for more races. I think that I signed up for more races so I could be in a constant state of race chaos and not have time to think about the possibility of not finishing the half ironman I signed up for.

Two weeks before Barb's I experienced the quiet before the storm. I didn't do any races during those two weeks and I was forced to acknowledge that this race was really happening and I may or may not finish it. The fear of not completing the race was because for 8 months it was ALL I could talk about to anyone. It consumed my world. If I didn't do it, it must mean I was a big fat failure. So, on race day I jumped in the water at the start of the race determined to make it happen. Determined to finish this challenge.

And then I crashed my bike. Just like that, it was all over.

It is a bit ironic that I signed up for a big triathlon because I wanted control over something, but the end result was a lot like being layed off. I put my time in, worked hard and challenged myself, but something out of my control (i.e. crack in the road, subprime mortgage meltdown) changed everything.

Luckily, I was able to finish the Big Kahuna a month later. I was also able to find myself a new career path. I have learned through my training that things don't get done unless you have a clear path, and even if that path abruptly ends, you have to get through it.

I learned that failure isn't an excuse to not get back on the bike.

short and not super sweet

2008-10-19T19:47:00.000-07:00

so...the nike women's 1/2 marathon was today. It was ok. It was my slowest half ever in my 2 1/2 year history. And that is OK. I think at mile 8 of a race I realized that this is not gonna be me PR and I had two choices: take walk breaks or keep trudging along.

I don't do walk breaks.

Here are my race lessons:
1) Don't assume that just because you have ran a 1/2 in 2:02, you can do it again without training. 31 year old bodies don't quite work that way.

2) Though the race was enjoyable, it was a little too Corporate America for my taste. Though Tiffany finisher necklaces wrapped in blue boxes with white bows, jamba juice smoothies and nike schwag are nice---it is rather off putting in these strange economic times. When I run because I am going to get all this "stuff," it overrides the true reason I run: it makes my soul feel good.
Props to the race organizers because it was well organized and efficient. I am glad I did this race because it is another one to check off.

A lot can happen over 7 months...

2008-10-17T20:28:00.000-07:00

Sunday is the Nike Women's 1/2 Marathon. Yes, I was one of the very fortunate 20,000 women chosen at random by a lottery to participate. This is the 5th year of the marathon/1/2 marathon and it is definitely a "to do" race for Bay Area female athletes. This is the race where you get a tiffany finisher's necklace handed to you by SF firemen dressed in tuxedos. I actually have never done this race, but entered the lottery last March (about a month into my 1/2 iron training).

The problem with registering for a race seven months before the event is the fact that you don't know where you will be in the future. A lot can happen over 7 months. Take me, for example. Since March of 2008 I have: had a total career change into the non-profit world; trained for a crazy endurance event; found out what my core was and tortured it; bought my first house with the hubby; had a half marathon PR; raced another 1/2 a month later NINE minutes slower; became obsessed with Gossip Girl; swam to the Presidio from Alcatraz; went back to my (almost) natural hair color; completed 7 triathlons only to crash my bike at my BIG one and received a mild concussion mixed with my first DNF; and FINALLY finishing a half-ironman and now...

I am kinda tired.

Tired of moving. Tired of packing my tri-backpack and fretting over whether I packed the right shoes. Tired of eating weird food like chicken broth with sirachu sauce and peanut butter check mix the night before a race. I am wondering what the hack happened to my mojo.

Thursday I had my last workout of the year with coach Heidi and she (as usual) had very helpful words:

"I think you should take 6-8 weeks off from racing. And that includes training. You can do yoga, go for a bike ride...but you are raced out."

And she is so right.

Unfortunately...I have this Nike race on Sunday. And the Catalina triathlon in November. So, basically from November 8 to the end of the year I will be a race-free Jill.

At first I was doubtful. I always loved doing the Silicon Valley Turkey Trot. Would it be horrible to miss it this year?

The answer: of course not. Do I need ANOTHER turkey trot t-shirt? nah. If I really want to be a part of the race, I can always volunteer.

This Sunday's race, however, I have NO clue how it will go. My training has been either sporadic or non-existent. The last time I ran over 6 miles was at the Big Kahuna and that was more of moving my legs to avoid passing out then it was running. I have decided that this race will be my "casual attitude" race. I am not going to stress about it and just feel fortunate that my name was picked to run 13.1 miles for a tiffany necklace.

There are worse ways to spend a Sunday morning, right?

Have I become Mr. Big?

2008-10-02T11:24:00.000-07:00

On Sunday I did the Mermaid Triathlon in Santa Cruz. I was looking forward to this event because it is put on by the group who helped me train for my 1st half-iron. Mermaid events are awesome because they are all women, super supportive and you get great race t-shirts and finisher necklaces.

This race, however, was not my best effort.

I don't know what the heck is going on with me---but my motivation is not as present as it has been in the past. Since the Big Kahuna 3 weeks ago, my training has been pretty non-existent. I just look at my bike and think, "ugh!" Isn't that terrible? I am like a bad boyfriend. I loved my bike when it was shiny and new and jazzed it up with pink handlebars and accessories. I worked hard to get better, but I didn't work as hard as I should have. I didn't take the time to get to know my bike, to know how to ride it safely. And once things got rough and I had a bad bike crash, my feelings for my bike started to fade.

Have I become Mr. Big and is my bike Carrie?

Anyways--back to Sunday's race. My coach suggested I sign up for the Mighty Mermaid which is the same course, but you do it twice. Of course I signed up for it because I am stupid and do things without thinking about them. That is how I found myself jumping off a ferry near Alcatraz.

Here are some highlights from this race:
1) Swim was good. I didn't maul any sea life this time. Doing the course the second time is kind of strange. I had to exit the ocean, run under the pier and then jump back in. I miscalculated the depth of the water and landed on the sand. ouch.

2) You have to run up a bunch of stairs to get to the bike transition after the swim. THAT SUCKED! It must have been 180 stairs. ugh!

3) The hills on the bike were tough but I powered through them. I still hate that feeling of finishing the bike and seeing all the other bikes on the rack. Oh well.

4) The run was ok---I just didn't have my fire. Where did my speed go?

Fortunately I didn't set unreasonable goals for this race. I wanted to have a good time, cheer my friends on and be inspired by women of all ages and sizes challenging themselves.

I have decided that my last triathlon of 2008 (Catalina in November) is going to be the race where I push myself. I am ready to finish strong and fast!

So...that pretty much means peeling myself off the couch. Rats.

It is one thing for ME to doubt myself...

2008-09-10T10:30:00.000-07:00

Now that the tri racing season is almost over, I have to think about what my next goal is. I talked to my coach yesterday about my frustrations of being a sucky cyclist. Her suggestion?

"I think you should take up mountain biking!"

After I stopped laughing in my head, I though: "uh---heck no."

I had no, I repeat, NO desire to ever get on a mountain bike. I watched the Exterra Tahoe triathlon on TV last year and watching the cyclists tear through single tracks made me almost yack. I am a bona fide klutz who knows her limitations.

But then my coach went on to tell me that on a mountain bike, you really have to trust yourself because if you stop trusting your body, then you go down. She reasoned that it would really improve my confidence on the bike.

"Would it?" I thought to myself.

And then the seed was planted...the same type of seed that made me sign up for Alcatraz. That seed is evil, I tell you.

But would we have room in our garage for ANOTHER bike? Then I started thinking about how much cuter mountain bike clothes are than road cycling. I was already envisioning myself all decked out in REI's fall fashions.

I let the idea marinate overnight and then I told Dennis.

"Heidi thinks if I pick up mountain biking it will make me a stronger cyclist."

His eyes kinda bugged out of his face, which I anticpated. That is the "Jill has one of her crazy ideas" faces. (I wonder if we are a Lucy and Ricky for the millennium).

He coughed, "Uh yeah....I am not sure about that....you will probably hurt yourself."

Oh.No.He.Did.Not.

It is one thing for ME to doubt myself, but when someone else doubts it---I just want to do it even more.

Later this morning, I sent him an e-mail:

"I hope you realize that you doubting I can mountain bike only eggs me on."

He wrote back:

"Ha ha...I already looked up some women's mountain bikes this morning."

I smiled at the words on my monitor.

Millenium Lucy loves her Ricky. He eventually comes around and is her biggest supporter.

What next?

2008-09-08T18:31:00.000-07:00

So, it is over. 7 months (9 if you count when I registered for the race), 2 bike helmets, 2 pairs of shoes, 7 race swim caps, one bike crash and mild concussion and I finally finished my first half-ironman yesterday. How do I feel? In all honesty---relief, mixed with mild disappointment. I liken finishing the race to graduating high school. There was all of this preparation, anticipation, buying of special outfits but when it is all over, I just think two things:

“I could have done it better.”

And:

“What next?”

Except, the day after graduating high school I didn’t feel like I got hit by a bus.

Three weeks ago I signed up for Big Kahuna triathlon in Santa Cruz because I wanted closure from my bike crash and DNF from Barb’s Race. The problem was, I didn’t exactly train very well post-Barb’s. I was on the couch because my shoulder hurt for a couple weeks and then the idea of training more seemed…exhausting. I think I was just spent from training so hard in June and July and when August came with not finishing Barb’s it just seemed unappealing to train more. I was at my peak 5 weeks ago, and suddenly I just felt blah.

I came to the race in a totally uncharacteristic fashion. Usually racing is the one time I get a little type A---specifically triathlons. The multi-sports mean you have to have everything packed and ready to go for swimming, running and cycling. My biggest fear is that I am getting my transition ready and I pull out two left running shoes. If you know me well, you know this is a big possibility.

At the Kahuna, the only time I got mildly OCD was when I couldn’t find my helmet number. Other than that, I was pretty calm and collected. I only had two goals: not to bite it on the bike and to finish before they closed the race.

So, here are some key points to my race, from start to finish.

1) Jumping in the ocean at sunrise in Santa Cruz on a clear morning is very awesome.

2) Clawing through slimy seaweed, however, is not.

3) ¾ of the way through the swim I smacked a fellow swimmer on accident. Except when I looked up, I realized it was a seal.

4) Whoever designed the transition from swim to bike at this race is a cruel person. Running barefoot ½ mile on Santa Cruz sidewalks is not fun.

5) When you take time off from cycling---the crotch is the first to go. The bike ride was torturous and I felt so out of shape.

6) It felt like I was the last cyclist at the end of the bike portion. When I got to the transition zone, it seemed like all the bikes were there already.

7) The run was the first time in my 8 year racing history where I felt like I might puke.

8) Whoever decided to make the last ½ mile of the race end on the sand is super duper cruel.

9) Having to zig-zag through children playing on the beach may have even been tougher than the bike portion.

10) The best part of the race? Having Mermaid Coach Heidi as the announcer at the finish line. As I ran through the crowd she said on the loudspeaker: “There she is ---Jill! She trained since February and is finishing her first half-ironman!” Heidi, aside from my husband, as been a major supporter of me since February and it felt very fitting to have her close the journey she helped me begin.

11) 7 hours and 54 minutes or so (I can’t remember the exact time) is a heck of a long time to move my body.

So, it is over. I keep waiting for the sense of accomplishment to hit me, but I just think about bits and pieces of these past 7 months and try to put them together to make something whole. Yesterday was very humbling…I was in the very bottom portion of finishers. But, I was also relieved when I got off my bike in one piece and no flat tires. Yeah, it sucks to run a half marathon in 2 hours and 45 minutes when I did one in March in 2:02, but I also didn’t swim 1.2 or bike 56 miles before that race.

I remember going to a swim clinic in Santa Cruz last year with only one sprint triathlon under my belt. I saw these people pulling their wetsuits on and I asked them if they were there for the swim clinic.

“No,” one of them said. “We are training for Big Kahuna”

I was in awe. I knew that was something I could never do.

And you know what? Sometimes if feels pretty awesome to prove yourself wrong.

Frugality Beats Sanity.

2008-08-24T20:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday morning at 6:10 a.m. I was in San Francisco on a cable car barefoot in a wetsuit. Fortunately, I was not alone.

Six weeks ago, I signed up for the Alcatraz challenge and the day had finally come to do it. I got the idea from my friend LaRee who sent me the link for the race with the message: "We should do this."

I briefly skimmed the race web-page and thought, "Well, that will be after Barb's half-ironman, so I will probably want to do another event. And really, how difficult could a 1.5 mile swim in the bay be?"

As I started the registration process on Athletes Lounge, it did seem funny that I had to initial three disclaimers. Usually, most races have the whole "don't sue us if you die" or " no refund" disclaimer, but this one discussed bridges and other crazy things. I just shrugged and typed in the "JM" and quickly e-mailed my friend I signed up.

It wasn't until I started telling people about this swim and listened to their responses that the actuality of this event sunk in.

Here are what the basic responses were:

"What?"
"Seriously?"
"Why would you do that?"
"Brrrr."

These responses struck me as odd because when I told the same people I was doing a half-ironman they kind of shrugged their shoulders. I mean, this was JUST a swim.

I blame my naivete on not knowing anything (except for the whole island prison thing) about Alcatraz. I have never even done the tourist audio tour of the island. This race was not on my "to-do" list of athletic events. Marathon in another country? Perhaps. Swim in the bay? To quote Bart and Lisa Simpson: "Meh."

My biggest concern before the challenge was, "Can I do this?" Of course, under usual conditions I can swim 1.5 miles in a pool, but this time was different. My shoulder was still not feeling 100% better since my bike crash at Barb's. Last Wednesday I finally got in the pool after almost 3 water-free (except for showers) weeks. I felt ok. Plus, I already forked over the $100 to participate, Frugality beats sanity. The race was on.

So, that is how I found myself riding public transportation in a wetsuit. Me, and a bunch of other people took a ferry a few hundred yards from Alcatraz to do this crazy swim. It still seems crazy to me. I mean, I literally jumped out of a ferry and swam to the Presidio. Me. I don't usually do crazy things like that.

The swim kicked my booty. I have no idea how far I swam because there is kind of a crazy current in the Bay. The race director said it was a 1.5-1.8 mile race. I was definitely unprepared for the crazy waves slapping my body every few seconds. Plus, the participants were pretty spread out so there were times when I was swimming by myself. There were also time where I didn't see anyone behind me and I thought, "Am I going to be the last person out of the water." I swallowed my pride and reasoned, "Well someone has to be last. Maybe I will even get a cool prize." Honestly, I just wanted to finish this beat.

And I did. And I was 42 out of 56 in my age group. I jumped off a ferry in the San Francisco Bay and swam to shore in an hour and 6 minutes.

And you know what? That is kind of cool.

It was cool because I was still smarting from my Barb's race DNF and in the back of my head I worried that I was on this bad karmic train and would never finish a race again.

But the good news is-my spirit is back and I even signed up for another half iron-man in 2 weeks. I may be a little out of shape due to lack of training since my accident, but I feel in my bones that I can finish a half-ironman. Even if it means perhaps coming in last.

"

I wonder...

2008-08-11T14:52:00.001-07:00

If I will be healed in time for the Alcatraz Challenge on August 23. And also, can sharks smell fear?

Did they have to make it red?

2008-08-05T11:02:00.000-07:00

I am on the road to recovery and able to dress myself again. Yea! The bad news: my wound is leaking on my dress. Gross. Maybe I should have gone with sleeveless today.

My shoulder is fine except when I move it. Luckily the headache is gone, so I probably haven't done a whole lot of damage to the brain.

I couldn't resist the urge to look up my result for the race. I did the swim in 42:16 which isn't too shabby considering I didn't realize the race was even starting. But right below my name on the results web page were the dreaded initials:

DNF

Did.Not.Finish. Seriously, did they have to make it red? Knock a girl while she's already down and road rashed why don't ya?

(BEWARE: Ranting Section)

This sucks! It really does! This was supposed to be my race. I was so ready to have this major accomplish under my tri shorts and what do I get? Bump on the head and a shoulder resembling prosciutto.

ok...done ranting. I can't be positive and zen-like all the time.

"What's my name?"

2008-08-04T10:30:00.000-07:00

I can’t believe Barb’s race is over. It came and went so quickly—even though it was way back in December when I registered for my 1^st half-ironman triathlon.

Looking back, I think I put more time and energy training and preparing for this race than planning my own wedding---but that is just because I was a lazy bride. Barefoot on a public beach in Maui was much more appealing than choosing hideous bridesmaid gowns.

I camped with my mom, sister-in-law and three nieces the week before Barb’s. We were in this great little town of Duncans Mills and our campsite was right on the Russian River. We played cribbage (Google “cribbage” if you don’t know what it is), swam in the river and made s’mores (by the way--peanut butter cup s’mores are delish).

One day I took my 4 year-old-niece Susie to the restrooms and we decided to run back. She was wearing flip flops and suddenly fell on the road. She started crying and I did a quick assessment to make sure there were no broken bones or skinned knees. I helped her up and wiped away her tears. I told her she was fine and not to worry because Aunt Jill falls down a lot when she runs (see blog entry “Greatest Hits” for proof).

“Why do you run then if you fall?” She sniffled.

I thought about this. I couldn’t tell her, “Well, your aunt is kinda foolish, huh?”

“Well,” I said as I grabbed her hand, “Just because we fall doesn’t mean we stop doing what we love.”

Dennis finally got to the campsite the Friday before the race. We drove to the race packet pick-up and the nerves I suppressed all week finally came bubbling to the surface. Was I really going to do this? What was it going to feel like? How long would it take me?

Dennis calmed me down and we checked out the expo and went to the course pep talk. My nerves changed into excitement and I knew that I was ready to do this race.

We woke up bright and early to head to the race start at Johnson’s Beach in Guerneville. My race OCD was in overdrive as I kept checking my transition bag to make sure I had my bike shoes and helmet. There was no parking available and I told Dennis to just drop me off and I would meet him at the finish. I was pretty freaked out as he drove off because I felt all alone. Luckily as I was walking towards the beach, I saw one of my friends and we chatted nervously. I set up my transition area and squeezed my wetsuit on so I could jump in the river and do a warm up swim. My friend and I swam a little and then headed back. I accidentally knocked her in the head with my arm and we started laughing because the race hadn’t even started and she already got hit in the head. When we were back on shore I heard “Jill!” I turned around and saw my coach Heidi and was so relieved. It was too hectic the night before the race for us to meet up and I was so glad to see her before the race.

We went into the water again and she calmed my nerves by telling me it was going to be a great race. We headed back onto the shore oblivious to a volunteer trying to get us back in the water. Finally we noticed her.

“Are we supposed to get in the water?” I asked.

“Uh, yeah,” she said, “The race is starting now.”

Heidi and I made a mad dash for the water and heard the starting horn go off.

“Oh my gosh,” I though to myself as I started swimming, “This is it.”

The swim went well. It was an out and back which seemed more difficult then the Catfish swim from a couple of weeks ago because that swim was more of a triangle shape. The swim felt good and finally I saw the last buoy and ran to the shore. The best part of the swim was the volunteers who helped take off people’s wetsuits. Shimmying out of a wetsuit is the hardest part of the bike transition and it was nice to have people order me around and tear my wetsuit off.

As I ran to my bike I heard. “Yea Jill!” and I turned to the crowd of spectators and saw one of my friends from the training group holding a sign that said “Go Jill!” I was truly touched to have my own sign. I waved at her and she shouted our team motto: “Dominate!”

The bike started off well. A lot of people passed me, but around mile 17, I was passing people. I had done the bike route before and knew that I had a ways to go. But—I was feeling good.

That is until mile 22.

I am not sure what happened, but I think my mind wandered and I wasn’t paying attention to the road. The road was bumpy and one part was higher than the other. I guess my wheel was right between the raised part of the road and the flat and my bike lost control. I tried to steer it in the right direction and everything was in slow motion until my body hit the ground.

Everything else is kind of a blur.

Somehow I got up, but I don’t know if someone helped me. My vision was going in and out and it was a very out of body experience. Someone asked me if I was ok and I said yes, I want to get back on the bike. I wanted to finish the race. I couldn’t see anything but kept talking. A man told me to rest and guided me to a place to sit down but I had a difficult time balancing. Suddenly, I heard my name:

“Jill are you ok? Are you ok?” It was my friend whom I met up with before the race. At least I think it was---I still couldn’t see anything.

“Yeah,” I mumbled, “I am fine.”

Luckily there was a man who owned a bike shop in Santa Rosa who was helping people repair bikes, I sat in his truck as people discussed whether they should call an ambulance or take me to the medical tents at the finish line. I felt floaty and discombobulated, but just wanted to finish the race.

The man packed up my bike in his car and said,” You can’t finish –your bike is in no condition to ride. Also,” he said holding my beautiful new pink helmet, “this thing is cracked and you cannot wear it.”

The cracked helmet explained my floatiness—I had a mild concussion. We drove away and I tried my best to remain coherent.

“How is my bike” I asked him.

He started laughing, “That is a sign of a true triathlete—worried about your bike. Your bike is fine”

I smiled weekly and suddenly felt all the pain my body endured. I looked over at my left shoulder and saw blood and road rash. It seized up when I moved and I wondered if it was dislocated. My left thigh felt like it was on fire and the fingers on my right hand were banged up from the gravel and starting to look raw. I was glad I remembered my bike gloves that day.

Somehow I made it to the medical tents at the race finish and was examined to make sure I didn’t dislocate anything or do damage to my head. A doctor came up and introduced himself before examining me I called Dennis’s cell phone and left a message. He was with my mom at our campsite and I knew he didn’t get reception. I had someone call the campground so they could let Dennis know where I was (it was a good 3 hours before I was expected to finish). I told the person calling the campground to make sure they know I am OK because I knew my mom would freak out if someone told her I got hurt at the race.

The doctor came back again and asked how I was doing. I said fine.

"What's my name?" He asked me.

Crap. I don’t even remember names on days I don’t crack my helmet.

He said, “It is Mike. Remember that, because I am going to be asking you that for the rest of the day. Do you know why?”

“Yeah,” I said, “to make sure I didn’t scramble my brain.”

It was about an hour until Dennis picked me up. We gathered my stuff from the run transition and I know I must have looked pathetic with my arm in a sling. My head was killing me and it was pretty depressing seeing the finishers with their medals and smiling faces. Honestly though, I was much more concerned about my brain hemorrhaging and felt lucky I didn’t hurt anything else or that I didn’t take anyone down with me.

I am so glad Dennis was with my mom when the campground employee told them I was hurt. He is so rationale and I guess he told her that if I was really hurt I would be in the ER, not the medical tent.

Dennis packed up our stuff and drove home. It was a miserable drive because I got nauseated on the back roads and Dennis wouldn’t let me fall asleep because of the whole head injury thing. Plus he kept asking me what our address and phone number was to make sure I was still with it. I finally got to shower when we got home, but it was too painfully to take off my sports bra that we had to cut it off. I must say I am pretty impressed with how durable Zoot tri shorts are---they didn’t get torn at all from the fall.

It has been almost two days since the accident. My shoulder is staring to feel better and the huge welt on my thigh is going down and turning colors. It feels strange to be slightly immobile and confined to a couch because the last 2 months I have been a non-stop training machine. I must admit, I am a little heartbroken about not finishing the race. It was my first DNF ever, and I figured that it would happen eventually. I planned for so long for this race and it was pretty much all I could talk about.

But, honestly, it wasn’t like I was trying to win the race or that it would be the last half-iron EVER.

There is a half iron in Santa Cruz at the beginning of September and if I am feeling better toward the end of the week, I am definitely registering.

After all, just because I fell doesn’t mean I am going to stop doing something I love.

"You aren't going back to your hippie days, are you?"

2008-07-22T08:40:00.000-07:00

The other day Dennis and I were chilling on the couch, drinking coffee and entertaining ourselves (me: watching "My Life on the D-List"; him : reading the news on his laptop). He chuckled out loud and I paused the show to ask him what was so funny.

"Well, I am reading this article from the New York Times ----hey I am not going to finish the story if you keep rolling your eyes."

I couldn't help the roll. I love to tease him about when he quotes NPR or the New York Times because if it came from anyone else besides him, it would seem undeniably pretentious. Luckily, he is the smartest person I know so I can cut him some slack. It is cool though because I often quote US Weekly. We balance each other out.

"Sorry," I said, "Continue."

"Well, the writer of the article discussed how 'narcissist' is the new buzzword and everyone is all self-absorbed with Facebooks, MySpace, blogs. The author believes they really they aren't being narcissistic, they are just being jerks."

"Heh heh," I said weakly, "Funny."

As I thought about blog posts, uploading race photos to MySpace and how I talk about my triathlon training with everyone I run into, I started to wonder something: "Have I become narcissistic?" Or worse: "Am I a jerk?"

I think back on the past couple of years and, to quote Bobby Darrin, I'm beginning to see the light.

I am living in this little bubble where I think everything is about me and that people should revolve their lives around my actions. Plus, I think I have developed a bit of a chip on my shoulder and have a low tolerance for other people's actions. I tend to get worked up when someone cuts me off on the freeway, drives in the bike lane while I am in it, doesn't move on the trail when I shout "On your freakin' left!" I get irritated when people stand too close to me in Starbucks, I shudder when people bring children to restaurants and they start screaming. I can feel the stress working its way into my body and it doesn't really create sustainable energy (i.e. "that driver just flipped me off and I am so angry at him right now that when I get home I am going to take a nice long run." That doesn't happen. Usually I marinate in the anger and complain to Dennis about it.)

I think most of all I need to be more accepting of people who aren't used to cyclists or runners. if someone doesn't make room for me, I shouldn't scowl at them. What is that going to prove?

Last week my friend Jen and I went to Baskin Robbins for ice cream. We were enjoying our treats outside and saw this lady walking toward a car in the parking lot. She got really upset that someone had left their dog in the car with the windows rolled up. In fact, she got so upset that she went into Baskin Robbins and demanded to know who owned the car. She then yelled at the woman who owned the car about how she needs to roll the window down so the dog had air. She then got super worked up and continued to rip the lady a new one by talking about animal cruelty and then proceeded to use a ridiculous amount of obscenities. The owner of the car went outside to roll the windows down and the woman said to her in a very sarcastic tone: "Thank you very much for rolling down your windows. Thank you." And then she got a crazy look in her eye as the soccer mom went back into Baskin Robbins, "What? What are you looking at? Do you want to take a go at it?"

Meanwhile Jen and I were silent, avoiding any eye contact with the crazy lady. The crazy lady's friend finally convinced her to leave, and when it was safe I turned to Jen and said, "Um, I seriously thought this was going to turn into an episode of Cops."

Jen laughed and said, "It's nice to know that she is concerned about the well being of someone else's dog yet doesn't care about dropping F bombs in front of her daughter." Oh yeah, the crazy lady had her own 8 year old daughter with her as well. Classy.

"Do you think if I talked to her about that, she would laugh about the irony of the situation or she would try to kick my butt? "

"Probably kick your butt," Jen said.

"Hmmm...your right." I thought about it, "Do you think I could take her? I have never gotten into a physical fight before. I mean, if it came down to a self defense situation---I bet I could probably get down and dirty. I wouldn't be able to throw a punch, but maybe throw some kicks in or pull hair and scratch."

"You may have a bit of a chance," Jen said, "You have been working out a lot lately. I think my strategy would be to ask her 'What's one plus one?' and when she stops to think about it---bam! I kick her in the shins and run away."

We laughed into our ice creams and started talking about The Real World from the early 90s versus the skanky Real World now

Now that I think about it, what separates me from this crazy lady? When someone doesn't make room for me on a trail or on Foothill Expressway, I give them the dirtiest look or a gesture that says, "Thanks a lot,jerk wad." The crazy lady's approach to get the woman wasn't the most effective way to go about the situation. She could have calmly told the woman that it appears she may have forgotten to roll her windows down and the dog probably needs some fresh air. Then the woman would have said, "Oh my goodness! I can't believe that, thank you so much for your consideration." Instead, the woman was threatened by the crazy lady and probably was thinking, "Dang, I wish I didn't leave my pepper spray in the car with the dog." Maybe I need to be more like a rational human being and less like the crazy lady.

The evening after the NY Times conversation, Dennis and I were at a restaurant having dinner and I shared my revelation with him.

" I decided something today."
"What's that?" He asked before taking a sip of his Mojito.
"I decided I am not going to get annoyed by stupid people anymore."
After he almost snorted out mojito because of his laughter he said, "Come again?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. I feel like lately I have become more cynical and less tolerant of people. Like what good does it do to get worked up over someone who takes up the whole aisle of the pasta aisle in Safeway with their cart? Maybe they are cooking this great dinner to meet their future in-laws and they are stressed about the cooking. I need to be more tolerant of other people's journeys."

"Your not going to go back to your hippie ways, are you?"

"No way---I am totally going to keep showering and won't be listening to The Dead or anything. Well, I just feel that me grunting my annoyance or rolling my eyes isn't going to solve anything. It is not going to make people feel better about cyclists when we flip them off if they cut us off. I think I need to be friendlier to people when they aren't considerate. I think a smile and a 'excuse me, on your left' may be a good start. It is amazing how much more receptive people are to a smile than a scowl."

"This is true."

"So, from now on I am just going to let go of my anger and focus my energy elsewhere. I want to be a nice person again."

"Sounds like a very good goal. Now can we get the check and go see Batman?"

I agree and think that going to see the movie at the mall is a great place to test out being more tolerant of people. Usually the mall is filled with zombies dazed by all the products marketed to them. The trip to the mall went well, I smiled at people, said excuse me and noticed something interesting. If I go into a situation with a positive attitude, chances are I will I come out of it with the same positive attitude.

It has been three days and Optimism is beating Cynicism in the fight for my outlook on life. And actually, it makes driving not as annoying when I don't brace myself for people being stupid.

Now I just have to figure out how to make this positive thinking work for my triathlon training...

"I don't want to do this anymore!"

2008-07-21T08:16:00.001-07:00

It is officially less than 2 weeks to go until the big Barb's Race. The Vineman 70.3 was on Saturday and I checked out the results on-line, to get a sense of where I may be. I won't utter any goal times out loud until after the race for fear of jinxing myself.

My training is becoming pretty intense. For the past week, my workouts have been lasting 1-3 hours! that is like watching the newest batman plus all the million previews! I am tired and sore, yet have a lot more energy than I have had before. Plus--- food has never tasted so good! Yesterday after the Catfish swim Dennis and I went to breakfast and it was such a party. I was taking bites of my omelet, slathering jam on toast, piercing my fork in Dennis' Benedict and told him: "I am having such a fun time!"

The Catfish was a swimming-only race where you can choose to swim a 1.2, 2.4 or 3.6 mile swim in the Stevens Creek Reservoir. I signed up for the 1.2 because I wanted to know what 1.2 in a lake setting felt like (plus, I need more practice getting in and out of my wetsuit.) in preparation for Barb's.

I decided to call it a practice swim and not a race, because my RACE is in two weeks and I have my enthusiasm on reserve. Plus, as noted previously, my workouts have been getting intense and I definitely didn't have nice fresh legs for a race.

Dennis and I left at 7:00 to head to the race. We biked from our townhouse to the start---about 5 miles. I was also wearing my tri-backpack filled with my wetsuit, goggles, swim cap and towel. As I got on my bike, I could only think one thing: "Ouch!" It was my 4th day in a row on a bike, and certain unmentionable body parts were protesting the torture. Oh, wait, I was thinking two things: "ouch" and "brrrr." Funny, I thought it was supposed to be warm in California in July. Not so much at 7 in the morning.

We arrived at the reservoir and I stumbled into my wetsuit. Note to self---wetsuits are hard to put on when slightly sweaty from biking. I kissed Dennis goodbye and headed to the start. He found a good spot where he could watch both the swimmers and the bikes.

It was a water start, which meant you get in the water first and just kind of bob around until they start the race. I surveyed the buoys to visualize the turns and the distance of the race. Funny, 1.2 miles in a lake doesn't look all that far. It must be an optical illusion.

Unlike triathlons---which start in age group waves---it was going to be a mass start. I bobbed to the back of the pack as I didn't want to get in anyones way. I was not there to win the gold.

Speaking of which---there was a girl in the race who will be competing in the Olympics this year! How cool is it that I was in the same water as a future Olympian? Her race at the Olympics is the 10k open water swim and she wants to do it in 2 hours. Yeah, that is 6.2 miles of swimming! Rock star.

Anyways, the race started and bam! Pure anarchy. I have always been somewhat cautious about the open water swim in triathlons because of all the appendages flying everywhere, but this was like no open water swim I have done before. They should have called it the Sardine swim because I felt like we were a bunch of sardines squeezed together swimming. I had people swimming on top of me, pushing me, pulling hair (ok, maybe not pulling hair as we were all wearing swim caps)...It felt like an extreme sports version of "Lord of the Flies." I saw these two women frozen in the water eying the insanity and one said to the other, "I don't want to do this anymore!"
Luckily, I did not panic. I did, however, have to chuck my personal space issues out of the reservoir. I am not really a hugging person, nor do I like close talking people---but I had no choice today. Eventually the group spread out and I was able to maintain a good pace. I didn't go fast, but I really concentrated on my stroke and breathing. About halfway through the race it got a little congested again. I had one guy swimming on my right and a woman on my left and they were both coming towards me at a fast pace. I slowed my pace and let them both pass me and I watched them crash right into each other. Ouch. That is going to leave a mark. I am actually surprised Open Water Swimming isn't a bigger spectator sport as football--there is kind of a lot of physical contact and (though unintentional) violence.

1.2 miles is a long time to swim in the open water---the furthest I had done was .9 in the Olympic distance triathlons. I finally made it to the finish and got out of the water, wondering what my time would be. The clock had a little over 42 minutes on it. I was pleasantly surprised, as my goal was to do it in under an hour. All in all, a great practice swim. Maybe next year I will do the 2.4 distance.

I have learned a couple things about open water swimming these past few months:
1) Don't drink lake water unless you want parasitic pets in your system. Mmmmm...gardia...deelish...
2) Find a discreet way to spit in your goggles to defog them
3) Breastroke kickers are scarier than sharks.

Greatest Hits

2008-07-16T07:40:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I entertained my training group by telling a very embarrassing story regarding me, Foothill Expressway and my helmet. It made me realize that I have kind of A LOT of not so flattering stories involving me on a bike, in running shoes and possibly in the water. Some are athletic and some are not (i.e. riding a bike because I didn't have a car). So, in no particular order, I present you: "The Greatest Hits on Bike, Land and Water that Have Made me the Well Formed (klutz) Woman I Am Today." So enjoy, and if you totally bite it some time and are embarassed, refer back to this post and know someone bit it harder than you.

1) bike (recreational): While riding through University of Oregon's football stadium parking lot on the way to my apartment, I stopped looking in front of me for a minute. It was dark so I couldn't see things very well. For some reason I decided to look up and saw a rope used to divide parking spaces right in front of me. I slammed on my breaks, which didn't help with the bungee effect of my torso making contact with the rope and I fly off my wheels. Skinned knees: check. Bruised ego: check.

2) bike (recreational): same parking lot; I got off my bike to go through a gate and was face to face with this disgusting looking creature that is reminiscent of the Rodents Of Unusual Size from the Princess Bride (except the size of this dude wasn't very unusual). I slowly backed away from the hideous thing and he lunged toward me while making a warrior sound (o.k., I think it was just a small hiss) as his claw grazed my oh so stylin' Dickies overalls (cut me some slack---I was in college and my fashion sense wasn't quite fully formed yet---I promised my husband years ago that I will never wear overalls again). I screamed like someone attending the prom in Carrie right after she went all crazy telekinetic and jumped on my bike. Turns out the creature was the dreaded eco-system-destroying nutria that love to roam around marshy areas in Eugene and terrorize curly haired girls wearing overalls.
I still shudder at the thought of that claw.

3) bike (recreational): Let me preface this story by telling you that I was not a sporty kid. I wasn't even allowed to ride my bike past the end of my street, so as an adult I lacked coordination on two wheels. So, one time I rode through Eugene with some friends and we went up this hill. My friends in front of me got up of their seat to pedal up the hill. I thought, "Hey, that looks cool. I am going to try it." Next thing I know I am crumpled on the ground and my friends look back and freak out because they think the truck that stopped behind me hit me. Nah, just me being me.

4) Running: I am 10 and at sleepaway camp playing a very intense game of Capture the Flag. Even back then I had the habit of not looking in front of me while moving. So, while running for the flag, I made contact with a tree trunk that was waist level and spent the rest of camp with a huge bruise in a place where bruises NEVER should be.

5) Running: About 8 years ago I was running around my parents' neighborhood. There is a point where the sidewalk ends and you have to get off the curb and land on the street. It is early into my run and (warning: kinda gross) after 10 minutes of running I usually have to hock a loog.Because I am not the best athletic multi-tasker, I do the deed without realizing it is time to jump off the curb. See #3: "crumpled on ground."

6) biking (workout) While riding on Foothill Expressway two years ago (post-college cruiser but pre-rocking pink handlebar road bike), I noticed this male driver totally checking me out. He wasn't even trying to hide it as he cranked his neck to ogle. I rolled my eyes, wishing that a girl could just work out in peace. I turned into the left lane and we are both stopped at a light. The dude had the nerve to roll down his window to talk to me. What kind of tired pick up line is he going to use? I look over at him and he said "Your helmet is on backwards." Luckily my light turned green right after he spoke and I rode to a parking lot to flip my helmet around, totally embarassed because I was riding like that for TWO HOURS!

7) swimming: last year I went to an Open Water Swim Clinic in Santa Cruz. I had to rent a surfing wetsuit at a surf shack on the beach. The store dude helped me pick a size and I went to the restroom to grunt my way into the wetsuit. I looked in the mirror and thought, "I look ridiculous. Oh well." I went to the main part of the store and asked the store dude what he thought. He said while barely stifling a smile, "Well, it is on inside out. And backwards."

Are you noticing a theme here?

That is it for now. But don't worry, I am sure there are many more stories to come because as long as I am moving, I will surely be falling.

soundtracks, rantings on circle swims and mini to major freakouts

2008-07-03T08:46:00.000-07:00

Underwater Mp3 players are the best. I finally tested mine out yesterday with a 1700 yard swim. I probably looked ridiculous because the headphones are oval shaped and rest from the cheekbones to the ears. That combined with goggles and my "Oh Snap!" swim cap (yes, that is what is written on it in swirly letters) makes me look like quite the rock star.

Speaking of rock stars, finding songs for swimming was quite the fun little challenge. I didn't want anything from my running Mp3, and you definitely can't sprint in the water like you can when you run (so no testosterone music AKA Beastie Boys, Suicidal Tendencies and Guns and Roses). So, my swimming mix consists of such greats as "Gone Daddy Gone" (Violent Femmes, not Gnarls B.), "Heaven is a Place on Earth" and "Beyond the Sea."

The sound is ok, considering you are underwater. The quality reminds me of my old aqua blue cassette boombox that I used to listen to my Huey Lewis and Whitney Houston tapes.

There is something surreal about being underwater with music. I feel like I am in my own movie.

I have not been able to , however, enjoy my Mp3 and fancy lap counter because for the past 3 weeks the dang pool in my complex is being repaired. I am going to various community pools in the area, but they are packed. Nothing is better than having my own lane, but on Wednesday I circle swam with 3 other people! Not a quality workout. I was so distracted about my pace that I couldn't keep track of time. ugh! That pool better be fixed soon or I will be one angry trijill.

I think the root of my short fuse anger is most likely my mini freak outs about the race. It is seriously 3 weeks from tomorrow. I am having a hard time envisioning what those 13 miles are going to feel like after I ride 56 miles. It feels like forever since I ran 13 miles---though it was only last May. What will the swim feel like? Why does my body feel so tight lately?

Reality is starting to hit me as far as what I signed up for and I am gonna be honest...

I am pretty scared.

I am such a winner...

2008-06-30T20:47:00.000-07:00

because before I left for my training ride yesterday I checked myself out in the mirror and realized I still had my race number on my helmet. From a race that was two weeks ago. And I was riding for the last two weeks with #473 on my head.

So, that is why other cyclists were smirking at me and one driver asked if there was a race going on.

Awesome.

Reality

2008-06-30T20:25:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I rode the Barb's Race course. Well, I rode the course plus an extra 15 miles because it doesn't start in the same place. So, yesterday I rode more than I ever have in my life: 71 miles. My bootie is somewhere in Healdsburg right now.

The ride wasn't too bad. Rollers and a nice hill at mile 46 to keep you "honest in your training" (quoted from the Vineman website). It was nice to see the course and know where the heck Guerneville is and now I can visualize race day. Visualizing that 13 mile run after 56 miles on the bike is still quite difficult.

One thing I am noticing is that some people have strong opinions on cyclists. These opinions aren't very favorable. On my long 71 mile (c'mon---I have to mention this HUGE accomplishment one more time, right?). I realized the struggle cyclists face when they ride. People are honking, annoyed and agitated at a procession of two-wheeled athletes sharing the road with them. I made the mistake of stopping outside Guerneville to ask a tasting room owner if I could use his restroom. He spent a good 10 minutes lecturing me on how he doesn't like non-customers to use his restroom, my shoes will ruin the floor, cyclists will find out his place is a rest stop and BOOM! his company is destroyed (wow! I sure have a lot of power!). Then he openly admitted that he is bitter about cyclists and was sued by one because his tractor hit a woman on her bike. Because my bladder was ready to burst, I didn't have time to think quickly, but maybe I should have suggested that he started riding so he can acquire some chip-on-shoulder-reducing endorphins.

As I type this, I must say, I am getting worked up as well. I guess I was naive and idealistic thinking the world would embrace me being active and doing my part to break the stereotype of "lazy Americans." This is not the case. There is a whole subset of people who see me on the road and it creates rage in them. They feel I shouldn't be there on THEIR roads.

whew...ok...let me find my center and not focus on the anger. I guess I am frustrated because I don't know how to fix this broken relationship between drivers and cyclist. Yeah, some cyclists are jerks just as some drivers are idiots.

But serioursly folks--this division needs to stop.
We need to figure out a way to co-exist safely and free of bitterness.
Any idea?

Crunch Time!

2008-06-25T12:45:00.000-07:00

I am in serious withdrawal. I vowed to myself that after the Mermaid Triathlon on June 15^th I would NOT sign up for any more races until after Barb’s. I am jonesing right now to put on a bib and timing chip and go!

Luckily the Mermaid went well considering I was at the race at 5 am to volunteer, forgot my goggles AND my hat. I was 3 seconds away from finishing in the top 10 in my age group. 3 seconds!

I am starting to stress about the big race big time. Usually my stress dreams involve me finding out I need to go back to high school to take a class or seeing the school bus coming and not being able to get dressed. Last week I had a dream that I was trying to get to a race, but every 7-11 I went to was out of Gatorade and I arrived at the start as the last wave was getting in the water. Ugh.

I have a little over a month to go and my coach is ramping up my training hardcore. She sent me my calendar for the last two weeks in June and I started laughing when I read it. Seriously, this must be a joke. Then I remembered that I signed up for a half-ironman and training for it won’t magically happen with a little fairy dust.

In order to track my progress, I decided to start a training journal for this crazy workout regime.

Here it is so far:

6/18 Swim 2300 yards in morning; Run 44 minutes; speed work:

Swam at De Anza before work Went ok.

Ran at Rancho San Antonio after work. Was nice to be back on this trail. Hot as heck though. Legs still recovering from two weekends in a row of racing. Hard to sprint. Almost got stung by a bee when I took a drink from water fountain. Glad I put Journey on my Mp3.

6/19 Bike 1 hour 45 minutes moderate pace

Started at Lake Almaden Park after a meeting in South San Jose at 5. Annoyed at little kids in bathroom because I needed to change and they were hogging restroom doing who knows what. Super hot ride. Road down Almaden to Uvas road (25 miles round trip). Tooshie was tired on bike seat. Need more time on bike.

6/20 Morning: Swam 2500 yards; woke up at 6 to swim in my complex’s lap pool; super awesome to be only one in pool. Got bored and had a hard time counting 90+ laps. Ordered underwater Mp3 and lap counter from Amazon.

Evening: Ran 55 minutes with 6 1 minute sprints; hot, hotter mchottie! I was melting and thirsty. Note to self: running on El Camino sucks rocks.

6/21 Bike 3 hours 15 minutes; moderate pace. Drove down to Morgan Hill at 7:30. Biked Uvas to Hellyer to Santa Teresa. Bored by Santa Teresa’s flatness and wind. Decided to take Willow Springs road for kicks and giggles. Oops…pretty steep. Survived the hill and road past mansion where Junior prom was held. Felt pretty smug about being in better shape at 31 then at 17. Rode through downtown Morgan hill past high school to Cochrane and back to my car. 42 miles. Tooshie still hurts.

6/22 (Oh my gosh! Does this ever end?)

Swim 2600 yards (104 freakin’ laps); ran 1 hour 45 minutes immediately after swim. Swim was boring---Mp3 player please come soon! Legs felt wobbly after swimming. Almost got ran over by minivan who ran a stoplight. Swore a little. Ok…a lot. Worked at a health fair until 1:30. Played softball from 3:30-5:30. Had lots of energy from morning workout. Didn’t suck as much as I usually do at softball. Even caught a ball and went home twice!

6/23 Rest Day. Thank goodness. Baked 8 dozen cookies and a ladybug shaped cake for my Barb’s Race Fundraising. Wondered if 4 hours of baking counts as cross-training.

6/24 Biked an hour and a half with ( 7 )3 minute sprints. Chain fell off going up Mt. Eden. Luckily did not bite it. Finally felt strong on bike and tooshie did not hurt. Whoo hoo!

The rest of this week will be more of the same, finishing with riding the actual 56 mile bike course for Barb's as a training ride. Hope my tooshie can handle it.

that feeling of doubt...

2008-06-13T12:06:00.000-07:00

"What the heck am I doing here?"

That is what is going through my mind every time I race. No matter how well I trained/ate/slept/caffeinated, this thought floats in through my subconcious.

I am sure if I met a version of my 20 year old self, I am sure she would say, "What the heck are you doing?" I couldn't even run a mile at 20. I couldn't even get out of bed before 10 on a weekend day, let alone get up at 5 a.m. to jump in a disgusting lake.

But here I am, completely addicted to the feeling of completing a race. After a race I feel euphoric, but before a race I feel nervous and--worse---inadequate.

As I waited by the shore at Almaden Lake at last week's triathlon, my insecurities rushed over me. Even though I have aquite a few events under my race belt, I still feel like an outsider. I am sure compared to the average joe out there, I am fairly athletic. But surrounded by all these amazing physical specimens kinda humbles a gal.

I blame the tri clothing. It is the most unflattering to normal 31 year-old bodies like mine. I am not kidding myself thinking I am a supermodel, but I wish I didn't feel quite so hideous sucked into all that spandex. I wear the tri bike shorts and a tight fitting top, and these pro's are surrounding me in in similar outfits and I think, " So that is what you are supposed to look like."

Don't get me started on the wetsuit. Once I manage to pull that thing on and shove my curls into a swim cap, I don't feel like an athlete. I feel like a condom.

Another thing that is humbling is being passed by people in older age groups. Whenever someone passes me I always check out the age bodymarked on their rippling calf. These 45 year-old women are rock stars and have amazing bodies. Why can't I be like them? Why is this starting to feel like middle school gym class all over again? Why can't I have a body that is jiggle free and have a nice bobbing ponytail when I run?

How did this happen? How did I get excited about signing up for a race, only to get to the running part and have a major case of the Jan Bradys ("Marcia, Marcia, Marcia")?

My coach asked me why the run is the toughest part for me, and perhaps it is some of these negative thoughts I am having. This is going to sound awful, but I am going to go ahead and say it: I feel like everyone watching me is wondering, "what the heck is she doing here? She's no athlete?"

As I type these words, I realize that THIS needs to stop. I need to stop berating myself for not being perfect. It is kinda rude for me to think these thoughts about my body, considering it has put up with a lot of races and training and hasn't protested once to my abuse.

So, at tomorrow's race day, I vow to not compare myself to the 12% body fat woman gliding past me or feel smug when I pass a 24 year old on my bike. I am going to swim, bike and run my way into positive thoughts and find my center and all that jazz . As I am running, I will think to myself, "Jill you are a triathlete. And that is pretty awesome."
And I will kick it into high gear when I see that finish line, so I can hear the cheers of the spectators. They love a strong finish.

And so do I.

San Jose Tri: a new PR!

2008-06-10T12:00:00.000-07:00

The San Jose Triathlon held at Lake Almaden on Sunday was a pretty good race for me. I was hoping to improve my last Olympic time which was the LA triathlon in Sept 07. I did that race in 3:30. I did San Jose in 3:06. Whoo hoo---24 minute improvement! The most significant improvement of the race was my swim. I did LA in about 44 minutes and I did SJ in 29 minutes.

The swim was a nice smooth course and I only got kicked a few times (and I only kicked a few people on accident).

The bike went fairly well. I am trying to push myself harder, but I just need more time on the bike. There was a lovely long hill up Hellyer road, but luckily I have already gone up that hill on a training ride with Velo Girls.

The run is still where I fall apart. I did the 10k in 1:04, which seems slow considering the Uvas tri I did 5 miles in 48 minutes. I guess we will get to the root of this eventually.

Tonight I am treating myself to a post-race massage. I am pretty excited.

Next up is the Mermaid Triathlon in Fremont this Saturday. This is a smaller race, but my plan is to go hard and fast. This will be my last race until Barb's on August 2nd. After Mermaid, it will be time to kick up my training. Yikes.

The Season to Tri

2008-06-04T08:16:00.000-07:00

Though I had my first triathlon of the year in March, I believe May definitely woke me up for the tri season. After a brutal half marathon in the beginning of the month, somehow I managed to do better than expected at Uvas.

First the learning experience of the race:
1) Pick up race packet the day before, NOT on race day. If you do race day pick-up, a chain of events unfolds ( see items 2-5).
2) Get to event early to park because you may have to wait in a long line for race day packet pick-up.
3) Make sure you have enough time to "go" before the race. You may not have time if you wait in line for race day packet pick-up.
4) Keep twisty ties and safety pins in transition bag, because race-day goodie bags may be missing them.
5) Give yourself plenty of time to get transition area organized.

The race was chaotic in the beginning. I waited in a line forever to get my packet and bib. The corral was unusual because instead of "first come, first serve", each participant was assigned a space, but there wasn't an organized system for figuring out where your spot was. Trying to find my space in a sea of 900 triathletes was quite stressful.

Once we started the race, it was smooth sailing. The swim went well. The bike ride went well, except for a brutal hill towards the end. The run sucked--which is to be expected. My legs still aren't used to the transition from biking to running. All in all, I was satisfied with my time.

Let's do a fun comparison. Here are my race results for the march triathlon:

total time: 2:17:34    swim (.45 mile):  18:33   bike(14 miles):   1:10:36  run (3.1 miles):     40:17

Here are the Uvas Tri results from a few weeks ago:
total time: 2:18:34 Swim(3/4 mile) : 25:46 bike (16 miles) : 57:30 Run(5 miles) 48:21

The Uvas race was a bit longer than the Cal Poly one, and I was only 1 minute slower.

I think I am ready for the San Jose International Triathlon this Sunday. It will be my first Olympic distance this year, and it will be interesting to compare to LA triathlon's results from last year.

How Jillly got her groove back!

2008-05-27T10:53:00.000-07:00

It is amazing how much one weekend can change a girl's attitude.

I started the month of May with the not-so-great Sacramento half-marathon and trying not to think of the Uvas Triathlon in mid-month. My last triathlon in March was an embarrassment, and I had a hard time visualizing myself at this next triathlon.

On a personal non-racing level, I was not looking forward to the month of May. It was turning into one of those times where everything explodes: not only was work becoming insane as I had to prepare for 3 huge events with a total of 450 people attending, but my husband and I also put an offer on our first house! The double stress and obligations put a small snag in my training plans and I was getting a little nervous about Uvas.

The day before Mother's day, I participated in the Human Race with a team from work. Part of me was thinking about registering for the 5k or 10k and running the race, but I decided that my spirit---and wallet---needed a break from competing. So, instead of competing, I did something I hadn't done in a looooong time: I walked a race! It was a great experience, because I was surrounded by people united for one reason: to bring awareness to stroke. Our team dedicated the race to a stroke survivor and her caregiver/husband. I believe this was their 7th year doing the race, and it was inspiring to see her get out of her wheelchair to walk across the start and finish lines. I know the stroke survivor's story and how far she has come to get herself to cross that line and it definitely puts things into perspective.

On Mother's Day, I was talking to my 10-year-old niece about running. My brother had mentioned that she likes to go for runs and I immediately decided that I wanted to do a race with her. I invited her to be my buddy for the Girls on the Run 5k , a race put on by a non-profit that works with teaming up mentors with young girls to help with self-esteem and learn about running. We ran to the computer and logged onto Active.com and my excitement started to build as we selected our t-shirt sizes. I couldn't wait to run a race with her---maybe now I could get a family member to do these events with me. So, who cares that the race is a day before Uvas!

My niece and I had a blast. I loved playing the role of Coach Aunt Jill and took her out for dinner the night before (carbo-loading at Pasta Pomodoro). We laid our race clothes out on the floor the night before and set the alarm for 6:00. I woke up right away, and let her sleep in a little. Since I am not a mom, I didn't quite take into consideration the preparation involved with a 10 year old. I was already nervous about parking and packet pick up, so I rushed us to the car. She said something about breakfast, and I told her we could grab something on the way. I didn't have enough time for a Starbucks stop, so I gave her some Luna Moons ("They are like candy for athletes" is what I told her). She ate some of them and we made it to the start line surrounded by 1200 athletes (3/4 of whom were under the age of 18). We ran through Vasona Park and were given beads at each mile. I told my niece that if she needed to walk, we would walk. I told her if her body is telling her something, she must listen to it. We stopped at water stops and I was amazed at how well she was doing. However, around 2 1/2 miles she said the infamous little kid words: "I don't feel so good." And I said the infamous adult words: "Are you going to throw up?"

I will spare you the rest of the story. I rubbed her back and asked if she wanted to walk or just go home. She said she would walk and finish the race. As we walked, I told her that now she is a real runner---even though she got sick, she still made the decision to finish the race.

The crowd cheered us on at mile three and soon we saw the finish line. I looked at her and said, "This is it. Let's go all out and finish this strong." We sprinted to the finish line and I was so excited to see that look in her eyes of determination and pushing herself to her limits. I recognized that look as I have had it before many times. She told me she had fun, but next time she needed breakfast. I smiled sheepishly and agreed while mentally I started thinking about all the races we could sign up for.

After I dropped her off, I thought about how amazing it is to be in an event like a run or triathlon. I have been surrounded by people who all have goals set just for themselves, be it completing their first 10k, running an ultra-marathon or finding the strength to get themselves out of a wheelchair to cross a start line. How awesome is it to be surrounded by people all determined to improve themselves?

As excitement poured through my body I knew one thing:

I was ready for Uvas the next day.